"While Readers Digest....Writer's Cramp." a Poem Inspired by Always Exploring

Writing can be a wearisome task......

I get punch drunk from the punctuation,

my fingers get so flustered that they

often become dangling participles,

Far too often they swerve and miss a verb,

or turn a comma into a coma.

They are always on their periods,

so they can be quite touchy...these fingers.

Like exclamation points of flesh

they dot the i's that I script, but

the blood that rushes through them is Type-O.

I before E often has me going

AAAYYYYYEEEEEEE!!!!!

Paragraphs wind up in need of

paramedics when I am done.

Apostrophe's are my Catastrophes,

I can't adverbs so far too often

I just subtract them.

But hey I am just a writer, not a righter,

that should be an editors job.

My pronouns are complete amateurs (spelling???)eeks!!

and my nouns are but one letters removal away

from being nun, and that's a mother that

is anything but superior!

My royal typewriter has been abdicated

and now sits pauper like and

paperless in my basement,

My word processor has been canned,

thus I am forced to use a computer,

a PC which stands for Pretty Complicated/ crap.

They gave me Microsoft to write with

but it's hard, and whatever micro brain

designed it should be deleted one pixel at a time.

I write hubs while my brain sits

spinning its wheels and then I desperately

try to attach them.

Some are too short to be published,

and others take so long to load

that my butt has to go wagon off to bed.

I suppose I could use spell check

but then I feel like a warlock

making sure my curse will work.

I am no Dickens but I do beat

the dickens out of this keyboard

which never really seems to unlock for me.

Sometimes writing reduces me

to a childlike state, and I am left

to play with my mental blocks,

building castle from the ruins of my stone soul.

I have immense kingdoms that I don't care to revisit.

You have inspired me to write this silly ditty,

and I will post it and give you credit,

but don't try to spend it,

it's only worth ten seconds of fame

and then you'll be back to 'always exploring"

more profitable opportunities.

A dictionary eases the ditsy friction in my airy head.

A thesaurus is my bible when I want to make my

script-sure. in closing I should probably add

some footnotes, but I hate having to wash

all that ink off my toes.

I would leave you an appendix,

but the docs took that twenty years ago.

an autobiography would be nice but you would

wind up cruising my warped mind in an Edsel.

I never metaphor that I didn't like

but they don't come around that often.

Much like me lately, but this long piece

should make up for my recent absences.

Great work begets great work,

Thanks for sharing.