We’ve all seen movies like “Gladiator,” and know that this type of entertainment comes at the wellbeing of those performing. The only difference is that they’re now massively compensated for putting their minds and bodies at risk.
..."No matter how cute the kids, a certain percentage of them were definitely spawned by total mud whistles."
..."I enjoy writing, crocheting, photography, and long walks on the beach at sunset (just kidding)"...
..."Hear me out! Do I want to change ANY of you? No."...
..."When I replay it in my mind it looks like a WWE Smackdown. I can only imagine what it looked like from other people’s perspectives"...
"And just like that, you go from justifiable verbal momicide (patent pending) to irrevocable maternal guilt. Why are we wired this way? "
"He just fidgets and kicks, elbows and bounces for no reason whatsoever. It is much like what I imagine would result if the Tasmanian devil had ADHD and a nasty crack habit. "
..."I cannot help but believe we were both experiencing some rather unbelievable déjà vu at that very moment, as again my tiny plastic car unceremoniously bounced off of the back of his truck."
..."Say, if you were never more than seven to ten feet away from a koala bear, for instance. Sure, they’re adorable, but that would definitely be suspicious, correct?"
"I was being dragged through mud, mulch, and pine needles, which is even less pleasant than it sounds. Now I had to find a way to regain control...."
..."The next day, the snow continued to make travel risky, but by then I was like an animal stuck in a bear trap, and ready to gnaw my own leg off in order to have ten seconds to myself"....
....As for you, with the unvaccinated child: The one that you use to so eloquently argue, “But MY child hasn’t gotten any of these things!” Yeah, I’m talking to YOU....
..."Teenagers should not be allowed to congregate in groups made up of more than 3 people outside of school. I was either 16 or 17 years old. The exact details of the night are rather hazy"...
..."there was deafening silence, I think I may have even noticed a little tumble weed blow through. I’m not going to lie, I admit that I enjoyed basking in the terrified stillness of my children."
..."here you have this tiny, innocent little person, and despite all of my shortcomings, she trusts me so fully, so completely..."