The Meat Industry is Horsing Around with British Consumers! (Verse).

"Hell on Earth" The Horror of the Abbatoir

The scene in slaughter-houses recently can't be improved by the death of thousands of horses
The scene in slaughter-houses recently can't be improved by the death of thousands of horses | Source

The Scandal Grows as Hundreds of Food Items Contain Horsemeat!

Eat Your Cheval, Ros-Beefs!

“We’re sorry, we’re sorry, we’re sorry, of course,
There wasn’t much beef but plenty of horse.
It wasn’t our fault, we’re victims you see
That you thought it was lamb, but found more gee-gee.

It’s all over Europe, not just here at home
It’s getting more equine close to the bone
We asked some of our shoppers of meat bought today
“They had fish and chicken: of beef they said “Neigh!”

It’s infected our schools; our kids eating horse
And cantering home with their homework of course.
No wonder the riding schools are missing their steeds
The abattoir’s bought ‘em for Tescos vast needs.

The racehorses are traveling much faster these days
The losers are soon found on Sainsbury’s bays.
Poor old Dobbin no longer pulls ploughs
He’s competing in sauces with Hereford cows.

We’re trying to blame all the mess on the French
Before the judges in Britain have us by the bench
They’ve hated us dearly ever since the great row
When we gave a few thousand a dose of “Mad Cow.”

The shares of the ‘supers sink fast on the ‘Bourse
These bloody “ros-bifs” just won’t swallow our horse
But we’ve got a plan and are now packing boxes
Asda burgers next week will have portions of Foxes!”

Copyright R Challen

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Comments 18 comments

WillStarr profile image

WillStarr 3 years ago from Phoenix, Arizona

I suspect that we are going to be saddled with all sorts of unbridled horse humor after this.

Voted up and meaty.

bac2basics profile image

bac2basics 3 years ago from Spain

Bob this is outstanding, neigh classic , honestly it gave me a really good laugh, especially when I got to the tail end !! Voted up and sharing.

diogenes profile image

diogenes 3 years ago from UK and Mexico Author

Hi Will: it's been going on for years...of course, you old mountain men wouldn't be fazed by a nice couple of mustang chops!


diogenes profile image

diogenes 3 years ago from UK and Mexico Author

Hola Anne:

They don't eat horse in Spain, do they, but goat is often on the menu, no?

Bob x

old albion profile image

old albion 3 years ago from Lancashire. England.

Hi Bob. First class and so quick off the mark. I really enjoyed it. Well done.

Voted up and all.


bac2basics profile image

bac2basics 3 years ago from Spain

Hola Bob.

Yes they do, but not as much these days I don´t think. I have never seen goat on any menu´s though, but Rabbit is very popular here and I remember one morning waiting for a lorry to pass the end of my track so we could drive out onto the main road, it was filled with lovely cuddly white bunnies and I just started to say to my Hearty " oh look at the lovely bunnies " but stopped when I realised it was heading for the abattoir, shame.

diogenes profile image

diogenes 3 years ago from UK and Mexico Author

Hi A;;"

Old Albion

Anne (again)


Thanks for visit and kind comments


Jools99 profile image

Jools99 3 years ago from North-East UK

Bob, now it's my turn to chant! Brilliant! I canter wait to share this with my Aunty Winnie (wah,wah,wah....). Shared all over the shop etc.

diogenes profile image

diogenes 3 years ago from UK and Mexico Author

Hi Jools...we'll be competing for Nation's top bard soon!


xstatic profile image

xstatic 3 years ago from Eugene, Oregon

Wonderfully funny! I have followed this story wondering when it would be trotting across the Atlantic . perhaps in our imported meat products.

diogenes profile image

diogenes 3 years ago from UK and Mexico Author

I'll bet you it's there by now and just waiting to get discovered.


xstatic profile image

xstatic 3 years ago from Eugene, Oregon

I was afraid of that!

rasta1 profile image

rasta1 3 years ago from Jamaica

An interesting method of expressing a controversial topic.

tillsontitan profile image

tillsontitan 3 years ago from New York

Now when my friends say "night Mare"

I usually return a stare

With things progressing as they are

I'd better run in to my car

Lest I be taken for a horse

And slaughtered on the spot of course.

Loved your poem Bob, your irony is certainly not lost! The scary thing is it seems to be spreading so I would say farmers hide your horses!

Voted up, useful, funny, awesome, and interesting.

elayne001 profile image

elayne001 3 years ago from Rocky Mountains

Our Tongan friends and family love 'em a bit of lo'i hoosi (horse mixed with taro leaves and coconut milk) - the more the merrier! Perhaps you can reroute the meat to them. My brother loves to ride his horses and told my husband to stay far away from them!!

justmesuzanne profile image

justmesuzanne 3 years ago from Texas

This is so horrible. This is what We the People of the United States paid Ken Salazar, former Secretary of the Interior to do for years and years. He stole our horses from our public lands and sold them to his cronies for pennies on the dollar so that they could be shipped off to be brutally slaughtered and eaten. Horses that are auctioned often fall prey to slaughter as well.

Voted up and useful!

tonymead60 profile image

tonymead60 3 years ago from Yorkshire

Well done, what a funny verse, there were some really funny jokes circulating too. They compared Tesco Burgers to others and they won by a neck, sort of thing.

I have not since the sixties bought meat or produce from supermarkets, prefering to support local butchers, because it tastes better. I think people who buy food at Tesco just hate their families giving them such rubbish.

cheers Tony

Au fait profile image

Au fait 3 years ago from North Texas

Excellent verse and quite funny! Wait 'til you hear what's in store for us on this side of the pond. Yes, I plan to write about it if I just live long enough. Better even than pink slime.

Up and funny! Will share.

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