The Other Side of the Counter ~ It's No Good

A: Take the suggestion?
B: Stare at the cashier and the Service Desk clerk who gave it to you like a gormless twit?

If you chose "A" then congratulations. You are a functional human being.

 I am not intolerant of this woman because of Fibromyalgia, so hold off your hate comments based on that line. I understand that Fibromyalgia is a very serious illness and I know people who suffer from it and yet, are on a level of functioning far above this woman's apparent capability.

 A woman comes through my line. About two customers back she's fiddling with her Iphone and bragging to her friend about how cool it is and that she was able to afford it even though she gets a check every month from the government because of her Fibromyalgia.

So she finally gets to my line and as I'm ringing it up she starts telling me about her Iphone all the while playing with all of it's features.

I polietely ring her up, make small talk, the usual and send her on her way. About five minutes later she comes back to my register as I'm ringing someone else out.

Iphone lady = IPL
Me = The Artist Suffering for his Craft

IPL: Did you see my Iphone?
Me: *Looking all over my checkout area while still ringing out other customer* No, I'm sorry, I didn't.
IPL: I left my Iphone somewhere. This was the last place I remember it.
Me: *thinking*Oh, no. *Outloud* I'm sorry, it's no where here and I'm sure someone would have handed it to me if they found it.

Mind you I have absoultely no faith in humanity and I am completely doubtless that if I were to drop a 300 dollar Iphone even for a second on the counter of my store I would lose it almost immediately. I really did feel bad for the customer. She started looking at the magazine rack and around the floor, lest she dropped it.

When I was done ringing up my customer I went into my pocket to get my cellphone, thinking I would call her phone and see if we could hear it ringing. Unfortunately, there is a store policy in place that says I'm not even supposed to have my cellphone on me when I'm on the clock.

Me: If you go to the service desk they can call the phone from there.
IPL: *Stares at me blankly then leaves the store*
Me: *thinking* Okay...

 A few minutes later she comes back into the store. The lady on the service desk walks back towards my register with her and helps her try to find the Iphone in the exact same places. I'm more than certain that the Iphone is not here and with it's very loud blue covering I'm pretty sure I would notice it if it was near me.

IPL: I know I left it here somewhere.
Service Desk Lady: (SDL) Well, I don't see it here, I'm sorry.

IPL walks away again.

Me: SDL, I suggested she call her phone from yours.
SDL: That's a good idea.

But before the idea could be implemented IPL left the store yet again. But not before returing to the store to look, you guessed it, near my register. It was really almost like she was accusing me of stealing it and/or hiding it. But fine.

SDL asks me to go and round up the carts in the parking lot. Since IPL is still looking for the phone, I decided this would give me a loophole opportunity to use my cellphone since I was outside and helping a customer.

Me: What's your phone number?
IPL: *Gives me phone number and I dial it while she returns to her car where her friend is waiting.*
Me: *Hearing George Thorogood's Bad to the Bone suddenly* Ma'am! By any chance are your Ringtones set to Bad to the Bone?
IPL: *Calling back* No!
Me: *Still hearing that distinct ringtone coming from one of the shopping carts* Are you absolutely certain that Bad to the Bone is not on your phone as your ringtone?
IPL: *Comes back towards me* Well, my sister set it up, so I don't know.

Okay. The only phone number I dialed was hers and when I dialed it again and followed it to the the flap in the seat of the shopping cart, lo and behold, there it was!

IPL was so relieved. Of course this could have all been solved if she had just had the service desk ring her phone like myself and Service Desk Lady suggested to her.

Damn, I'm underpaid.