My Neighbor Is Like Mrs. Kravitz


Nosey Neighbors

Nosey Neighbors we all have one or had one sometime in our life. It is the person that is all up in your kool-aid and doesn't have any clue on the flavor. It is the person that will follow you around like a lost puppy to find out what is going on exactly in your life. They are not satisfied until they get information , in which you kindly say " It Ain't None Of Your Business!" You are outside weeding your yard and they will slow down and come to an almost abrupt stop to see what you are planting, or better yet what you are wearing. They peep over your fence like Mr. Wilson when you are in your birthday suit sun bathing by your pool and when you notice them and wave, they break their neck trying to crawl down from the chair that they are on. Go ahead grab your newspaper in your nice fleecy white robe ,as the peeping Mrs. Kravitz has her blinds cracked open to see what you are grabbing!! "Hi Mrs.Kravitz!!" you say in your early morning sexy voice, and wave.The blinds lickity-slip snap shut and you find yourself wanting to flash her but what the hell, the pervert across the street may enjoy it to. Leaving for the grocery store? Oh no, can't do that , as all of a sudden you find yourself hitting your brakes and hear a tap-tap on your window. "Hi.are you going to the store?", she asks as she is trying to poke her neck into your driver window, and watch her eyes zoom around as if she is looking for something , that you are hiding from here. "I am going to the store, what is that you need?" I ask, getting ready to pop her bozo the clown nose. Would I really do it? Of course not I am a lover not a fighter but it certainly sounds great. She replies, " Oh never mind , I can't remember what I needed." At this point my head spins like Linda Blair in the "Exorcist as I release my foot from the brake. What in the hell is wrong with that woman I say to myself. Nosey, Nosey, just plain Nosey! Returning from the story , she waves you down , "Now what?" I say to myself. "Yes, what it is it?" "What happened?" I pull into my drive, open the garage and bolt through the house to the back door. "Damn It." I yelled I forgot to turn the hose off and the pool over-filled. The entire yard is flooded, oh God my husband is going to kill me! I turn off the water and peep over the fence, "Thank You, Mrs.Kravitz for letting me know what happened." Now that killed me, nosey as she is she certainly looked out for me. The next time she peers over my fence I will ignore it because maybe just maybe she wasn't being really nosey, she was just making certain that I wasn't damaging my skin.


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Comments 28 comments

jjrubio 7 years ago

You are so funny!! I never had a neighbor like that. But I did catch my neighbor watching me change in front of my window...on several occasions. PERV!!!

Good Hub AE!!!

AEvans profile image

AEvans 7 years ago from SomeWhere Out There Author

We have one seriously only her name isn't Mrs. Kravitz !!! There so many nuts our cup runneth over...:)lololololo :)

jjrubio 7 years ago

LOL....I know what you are saying <LOL

AEvans profile image

AEvans 7 years ago from SomeWhere Out There Author

It is funny isn't it??? lololololol :D

mayhmong profile image

mayhmong 7 years ago from North Carolina

So this is what you two been up to! Busted!jjrubio, you should of either moon the perv or shoot the bird at him.AEvans, well done my friend! Guess some neighbors are just lonely like Mrs. Kravitz.

One of my worst neighbor gave away our cat and her new born kitten which I get to claim after being catless for 7 years. :(

What does it matter, I'm going to bed. profile image 7 years ago from Europe

You sun bath in your birthday suit? I want to be Mrs. Kravitz :))) Oh I love the new photo. Is that really you???? I'm in love!!! I mean I was in love with the last picture but, but, Oh my goodness I'm blabbering like a 15 year old on his first date :)))

AEvans profile image

AEvans 7 years ago from SomeWhere Out There Author

May: I am so glad that you apreciate it and it is sad about the cats, yes we all have a Mrs.Kravitz and good nite sweet dreams..:)

Zooloot: I don't know what to say but thank you and if you were as nutty as my neighbor I would have to knock you on your nogging. lolololololo :)

Benjimester profile image

Benjimester 7 years ago from San Diego, California

Haha, that sounds brutal. If I had neighbors like that, I'd definitely walk around the house naked. Being a guy, it's easier to get away with. Good luck. Hope you don't have to kill her.

Feline Prophet profile image

Feline Prophet 7 years ago from India

Hehehehe, AEVans why do these things happen to you...first the tub, then the neighbour! :P

AEvans profile image

AEvans 7 years ago from SomeWhere Out There Author

Feline, It seems has been my luck and I was so gracious to share the stories, but they don't happen all of the time. I feel like a news reporter when something breaking happens I must share.lololololo :)

Benji: If you walked around our house naked, she would probably attack you .lolololo :)

Feline Prophet profile image

Feline Prophet 7 years ago from India

Keep them coming AEvans...we love your stories! :)

Hawkesdream profile image

Hawkesdream 7 years ago from Cornwall

Thanks for the laugh, it's so true haha

TheSandman 7 years ago

That's very funny, but I live in the wrong neighborhood, nothing like sun bathing naked in the backyard or changing in front of windows happens around here. Or I'm just not observant/peeping tom enough enough LOL

AEvans profile image

AEvans 7 years ago from SomeWhere Out There Author

Feline: I love to share them, well some of them..lolololo

Hawkesdream: It is and we have all had at least one in our lives.

Sandman: You are probably not observant enough, and actually mind your business. I don't know if that is a good or bad thing..lololol :)

C. C. Riter 7 years ago

I don't have a neighbor like that. too bad, I'd have to do something to entertain her.hehe

O, you need an o; " the pervert across the street may enjoy it to." sorry, I tho't ya might need it, can't help it. had fun with ya's last nite, woo-hoo yer neighbor was watching too.

mandybeau profile image

mandybeau 7 years ago

My friends had a neighbour that wandered around in the altogether, she was a Nudist, trouble was she was huge, and nobody really wanted to look. I guess she didn't see herself that way tho.

great Hub


Lisa HW profile image

Lisa HW 7 years ago from Massachusetts

Great Hub.

When my husband and I moved into a house we were horrified to see tht the next door neighbor (an elderly lady) actually sat in the window, looking out (seemingly) all day long. She watched us coming and going to and from the car. After living there for a while, though, she and her husband turned out to be the kindest, sweetest, best, neighbors we've ever had. She wasn't as nosy as she appeared, made my kids goodies and yard Christmas ornaments, and did any number of things; and her husband offered to bring in our dog when it was icy and they knew I was expecting my daughter. They looking-out-the-window thing continued; but we came around to realizing they couldn't learn much more than what time we came and went. (When I brought my daughter home I got ready to hold up the pink balloons and pink blanket, to let her know I had had a girl. Having her in the window had kind of grown on us, I guess. :) )

AEvans profile image

AEvans 7 years ago from SomeWhere Out There Author

Mandy: Thanks for commenting and enjoying the hub. :)

Lis HW: Your story is great and in some way I have grown to enjoy our neighbor just a little more. Writing this and seeing her now enlightens my heart.:) She inspired me to write about her.:)

jjrubio 7 years ago

good morning BFF....

AEvans profile image

AEvans 7 years ago from SomeWhere Out There Author

jj: Good morning !!! ":)

eonsaway profile image

eonsaway 7 years ago from New Mexico, USA

Fun to read with icing on the cake cartoons.

AEvans profile image

AEvans 7 years ago from SomeWhere Out There Author

eonsaway: It is a true one and I am glad that you enjoyed the read.:)

ftgfmom 7 years ago

This was just to funny. I thought I was going to fall out of my chair when you said your head started to spin. rofl.

AEvans profile image

AEvans 7 years ago from SomeWhere Out There Author

ftgmom: The story is true and I am glad that I could make you laugh. :)

Peggy W profile image

Peggy W 7 years ago from Houston, Texas

Maybe if you did not show up for a few days, she would actually contact the police to make sure that you were OK. (At least hopefully she would do that.) In that have your own security guard watching over you! (Trying to put a postive spin on this!) Fun hub with your descriptions and cartoons.

AEvans profile image

AEvans 7 years ago from SomeWhere Out There Author

Peggy W: That would be nice and I would hope that she would do that:)

Dobie 6 years ago

an old apartment manager/caretaker was weird like that. he would always watch with binoculars who was coming or going into apartments. he would call cops almost everytime my daughter had a friend over because he didnt like them or whatever. my boyfriend came over one day and as i was letting him in, the caretaker burst through the door and said he was not allowed on the property. he was also caught spying in peoples apt windows. but he said he had a right to do that because he was the apartment manager and he is keeping an eye on the neighborhod. finally after the umpteenth time of residents telling the landlord if they do not get rid of him he would have lawsuits on his hands.

AEvans profile image

AEvans 5 years ago from SomeWhere Out There Author

Dobie: OMG! It can give someone the eebie, jeebies when there neighbor is nosey. Yours certainly is an interesting one. Thank you for commenting.

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