Crazy Laws in Florida and Fun Facts – Part Tw0

Did you hear about the crazy fart law?
Did you hear about the crazy fart law? | Source

Crazy Laws in the Cities of Florida and Fun Facts – Part Two

The fart law? The elephant and the parking meter? Sex with porcupines?

Which one of those crazy Florida STATE laws made you laugh the most in Part One? Whichever … get ready for more hilarity reading these crazy dumb laws enacted in the CITIES of Florida.

Key deer
Key deer | Source
My car just needs a little work.
My car just needs a little work. | Source

Crazy Laws in the Cities of Florida

In Big Pine Key – It is illegal to molest a Key deer.

This small deer species is often friendly but please do not take advantage of them. If you know what I mean.

In Cape Coral City – A $50 fine will be levied on anyone who allows a couch to sit in their carport.

Do not allow your couch to be a slouch. Teach it to stand.

In Daytona Beach – The molestation of trash cans is banned.

Somebody has to protect those poor, abused, defenseless trash cans.

Maintaining a car on your property which is no longer in use is prohibited.

I guess that means rednecks are not welcome.

What’s a redneck, you ask? … “You might be a redneck if your parents met at a family reunion.” – Jeff Foxworthy, comedian

Why would anyone want to give me away?
Why would anyone want to give me away? | Source
Maybe we should rethink our swimming attire.
Maybe we should rethink our swimming attire. | Source
Mobile ice cream cart
Mobile ice cream cart | Source

In Destin It is illegal for an owner of a store to allow another person to pass out free ducklings in front of the store.

Why ducklings? Why for free? Why such a weird law?

A law states that a cat that viciously chases passers-by is a ‘bad cat’.

It was probably a cat from Colorado* who refused to wear a taillight that inspired this law.

* See “Crazy Laws in the State of Colorado.”

If you wish to go swimming in the ocean, get dressed in your hotel room.

I would suggest you wear casual clothing rather than your best clothes that could easily be ruined by the salt water.

If you like to ride your bicycle in Destin, do not lean it up against a tree in a cemetery.

It is illegal to drive over graves in a cemetery.

If you notice an ice-cream man attempting to sell his cold concoctions in a cemetery, call the police immediately, for that is illegal.

Do you think that the folks in Destin seem to be overly concerned with cemeteries?

Or with potential retribution from disturbing their inhabitants?

Don't mess with me -  I'm protected.
Don't mess with me - I'm protected. | Source

In Hialeah – Ambling and strolling is a misdemeanor.

Better run like he!! when you are in that city.

In Key WestChickens are considered a ‘protected species.’

The folks at Kentucky Fried Chicken are in a whole mess of trouble.

In Miami Beach – No one may bring a pig with them to the beach.

Wait a minute! You can’t talk about my girlfriend like that.

In Pensacola – A woman can be fined (only after death), for being electrocuted in a bath-tub because of using self-beautification utensils.

So … who pays the fine? Just wonderin’.

In Sarasota – If you hit a pedestrian you are fined $78.

Is that with or without an automobile?

You may not catch crabs.

Stop snickering… you know what I mean.

In Satellite Beach – Persons may not appear in public clothed in liquid latex.

Whoa! Were citizens really appearing in public covered with liquid latex?

In Tampa – Women may not expose their breasts while performing ‘topless dancing.’

Sort of like semi-topless dancing.

Lap dances must be given at least six feet away from a patron.

Is that a physical possibility?

Women can be fined for falling asleep under a hair dryer. The salon owner can also be fined for this horrible crime.

What the …?

Water rat
Water rat | Source

And this one has to be one of my all-time favorites:

Florida law forbids rats to leave the ships docked in Tampa Bay.

Sounds like a plan. Just one question. Who informs the rats?

In Broward County – Persons may not be “inappropriately attired” who work at hot dog stands.

I know the specific reason for this bizarre law. Not long ago, the owner of a chain of mobile hot dog carts located at busy traffic intersections employed beautiful, young, nubile women wearing only bikini bras and thongs to sell hot dogs.

Traffic accidents soon became a daily occurrence.

If you missed “Crazy Laws in the State of Florida and Fun Facts – Part One” read it NOW!

“An optimist laughs to forget. A pessimist forgets to laugh.” - Anonymous

Overseas Highway
Overseas Highway | Source
Islamorada - Florida Keys
Islamorada - Florida Keys | Source
Megalodon shark tooth
Megalodon shark tooth | Source
Sailfish
Sailfish | Source

Fun Facts and Illustrious Information about Florida

The Overseas Highway is a 127.5 mile route (U.S. 1) from Miami to Key West which traverses the Florida Keys and includes the famed Seven-Mile Bridge.

Note: The 7-mile bridge is actually 6.79 miles.

Islamorada is billed as the Sports Fishing Capital of the World.

Note: The name, Islamorada, or purple island, came from early Spanish explorers. Want to sound like a native? Then pronounce it ‘aisle-a-more-AH-dah.’

Key Largo is known as the Dive Capital of the World.

Venice is known as the Shark Tooth Capital of the World. Collecting prehistoric shark’s teeth has been a favorite pastime of visitors and residents of the Venice area for years

Note: C.megalodon teeth are the largest of any shark, extinct or living. This shark lived during the late Oligocene epoch and Neogene period, about 1.5 million years ago, and ranged to a maximum height of about 60 feet.

The largest teeth are more than 7 inches in height.

Stuart’s nickname is the Sailfish Capital of the World.

Note: Sailfish may grow to more than 9.8 feet in length and weigh over 200 pounds.

Boca Raton Resort
Boca Raton Resort | Source
White sands of Siesta Beach
White sands of Siesta Beach | Source

Boca Raton in Palm Beach County means rat’s mouth in Spanish. But the words mean more than that to a sailor. ‘Boca de Ratones’ is a term used to describe a shallow inlet of hidden sharp-pointed rocks which might scrape the cables of a ship.

The longest river sailboat race in the world is the Annual Mug Race held on St. Johns River. The course runs 38.5 miles from Palatka to Jacksonville.

Important: Your sailboat mast must be less than 44 feet high in order to clear all the bridges along the course.

Siesta Key Beach won an award in 1987 for having the finest, whitest beach sand in the world. It is 99% pure quartz crystal and is therefore cool to the feet.

Ernest Hemingway posing with sailfish
Ernest Hemingway posing with sailfish | Source

Ernest Hemingway lived in Key West from 1931 to 1939. His home is now a museum and popular tourist attraction.

Note: Sloppy Joe's Bar in Key West was Hemingway’s favorite watering hole.

Key West has more bars per capita than any other place in the U.S.

Walt Disney World Resort encompasses 30,500 acres – it is approximately the same size as the city of San Francisco.

Note: Every day an average of 210 pairs of sunglasses are turned in to the Disney Lost and Found.

Mickey Mouse has more than 290 outfits ranging from a scuba suit to a tuxedo with lights. Minnie has more than 200 from cheer leading outfits to evening gowns.

U.S. post office 7x8 feet - Ochopee
U.S. post office 7x8 feet - Ochopee | Source
Police station / phone booth - Carabelle
Police station / phone booth - Carabelle | Source

Florida is the only state that borders both the Atlantic Ocean and the Gulf of Mexico.

Ochopee has the smallest post office in the U.S. It used to be a storage shed for a tomato farm which was converted when the original post office in the general store was destroyed by a fire.

Carabelle has the smallest police station in the U.S. The police phone had been located in a call box bolted to the side of a building. To keep officers dry when it rained, the phone was moved to a retired phone booth.

Cassadaga, home of the Cassadaga Spiritualist Camp, is known as the psychic capital of the world. A large number of psychics and mediums reside there.

Sweetwater was founded by a troupe of Russian circus midgets whose bus broke down. I kid you not. In 1938, these former circus performers acquired lots in the ‘Sweetwater Groves’ tract and built mini-scaled homes. For years, Sweetwater was known as the ‘midget community.’

Polished moonstone gem
Polished moonstone gem | Source
Just keep driving south!
Just keep driving south! | Source

The state gem for Florida is the moonstone.

Note: The moonstone does not occur in Florida but following the Apollo 11 mission in which astronauts launched from Cape Canaveral landed on the moon, the state designated the moonstone as the state gemstone.

The moonstone does not occur on the moon either.

Significant Statistics

Number of people who move to Florida each day – 1,000

Number of hotel rooms in Florida - 370,000 plus

Number of campgrounds – 700 with 100,000 campsites

Number of people who camp in Florida each year – 6 million

Miles of sand beaches – 663

Loggerhead sea turtle
Loggerhead sea turtle | Source
Zebra longwing butterfly
Zebra longwing butterfly | Source
Manatee (sea cow) with calf
Manatee (sea cow) with calf | Source

State Symbols

State nickname – The Sunshine State

State reptile – Loggerhead sea turtle and American alligator

State motto – In God We Trust

State fruit – orange

State beverage – orange juice (what else?)

Note: Florida produces about 75% of the oranges in the U.S. and 40% of the world’s orange juice supply.

State butterflyzebra longwing

State bird – mockingbird

State pie – Key lime pie

State song – Swanee River by Stephen Foster

State tree – sabal palm palmetto

State fish – Florida largemouth bass (freshwater) and Atlantic sailfish (salt water)

State flower – orange blossom

State mammals – Florida panther and manatee (sea cow) and porpoise (bottlenose dolphin)

I love living in Florida but every summer I am reminded of this quote:

"August in Florida is God's way of reminding us who's in charge." – Blaize Clement

© Copyright BJ Rakow, Ph.D. 2015. All rights reserved. Author, "Much of What You Know about Job Search Just Ain't So."

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Comments for Crazy Laws in the Cities of Florida and Fun Facts - Part Two 25 comments

fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 18 months ago from Beautiful Upstate New York

Doc.....Remember...don't bring your pig to the beach.....and you misunderstand the lap dance.....The dancers are all secretaries, holding their lap-tops as they dance..... I wonder who is in charge of holding the rats captive aboard while the passengers leave the ship?

And finally, Do you have any idea how a trash can might be molested?

I've always known Florida is a tad off the beaten path...but I didn't think it was this twisted! ...UP & FUNNY!


billybuc profile image

billybuc 18 months ago from Olympia, WA

I think it's only fitting that Florida has two segments in this series. Sex with porcupines? Ummm....Ummm....I'll be squirming the rest of the day. Molest a deer? Ummm....ooooooh.....I'm never, ever going to Florida!


Ericdierker profile image

Ericdierker 18 months ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

I guess we just have to accept that we are the ones that elect people that make up such crazy laws. I can just see some of the folks at council meetings demanding that the trash has rights too.


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 18 months ago

I think a couch in a carport is a cozy set-up.


drbj profile image

drbj 18 months ago from south Florida Author

Re your kind inquiries, Paula, please be advised: 1) My pig enjoys mud more than sand so the beach is not an option.

2) Thank you for your clarification of the lap dance. So the laps are laptops! Who knew?

3) From my vast experience on cruise ships I can affirm with certainty that on every ship there is a Hotel Director, a Food and Beverage Director and a Rat Director to control vermin traffic. Some of whom on occasion may be of the homo sapiens variety.

4) As to your query re the molestation of a trash can, I hesitate to respond since this is a family-oriented site. ;)

If you have any further questions, please do not hesitate to write.

Yes, Florida is twisted but then again, aren't we all?

Love your comments - always - and the Up and Funny.


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 18 months ago from Beautiful Upstate New York

DRAT!......I just can't get you to incriminate yourself in the least!!

Without my twisted mind, I would be a terminal bore and I'm afraid life would simply not be worth................ hanging out with people like you!


drbj profile image

drbj 18 months ago from south Florida Author

As a Florida resident, Bill, I can attest personally to the bizarre quality of many of its laws. If you are squirming re the porcupine and Key deer rules of proper conduct, just think about how the porcupine and the deer may feel. On the other hand, that might make you squirm even more. :)


drbj profile image

drbj 18 months ago from south Florida Author

You are so right, Eric. What more can we expect when we elect crazy legislators in the first place? Maybe we could educate the voters. Naw, on second th0ught that won't work. Many of them vote only for those who provide the most freebies like government handouts.


drbj profile image

drbj 18 months ago from south Florida Author

What a great slogan for Hillary: a chicken in every pot and a couch in every carport. That's a winner, bp. The slogan, that is, not the candidate.


drbj profile image

drbj 18 months ago from south Florida Author

Well, you know what they say, Paula, it takes one to know one. And this twisted mind is happy to have found you, m'dear. You and I both understand that he (or she) who laughs . . . lasts!


PegCole17 profile image

PegCole17 18 months ago from Dallas, Texas

Well you've outdone yourself on this one Drbj. The liquid latex and the non topless dancers really have a challenge to face. I remember some of these restrictions like the one about Key deer but the law about the free ducks is just plain weird. Must be a regional thing about ducks. We also pronounced it My am uh for Miami and Islamorada just as you said.

I always enjoy reading your informative facts, too. August is a month to stay indoors. I was born that month in Florida before air conditioning was common. Poor Mom...

Up, funny and more.


DzyMsLizzy profile image

DzyMsLizzy 18 months ago from Oakley, CA

Hahahaha!! These were great! I love the "logic" behind some of these! What were they thinking? (Or smoking?)

I wonder about the height of the sailboat masts: is that for high tide or low tide? ;)

There are some pretty crazy laws on the books all over this country. I remember reading somewhere once that one of the southern states' towns (I forget which), has a law forbidding pigeons from flying over the town. Much like the one here about rats: who's going to tell the pigeons, and enforce the law???

California has a number of these as well..including one that states a housewife can be arrested for failing to boil her dust cloths! Wow.

Voted up, interesting and funny!


AliciaC profile image

AliciaC 18 months ago from British Columbia, Canada

This is another interesting, funny and informative installment in your crazy law series, drbj. I hope you plan to continue the series for a long time!


drbj profile image

drbj 18 months ago from south Florida Author

Hi, Peg. Thanks for appreciating my 'outdoneness.' Sometimes I can find the basis for a particular crazy law. For example, some participants in a parade did cover themselves with liquid latex - and little else.

But the semi-topless dancing - isn't that false advertising? Unless of course, they are real. (Sorry - the debbil made me do it.)

And the ducklings law makes no sense - why aren't little chicks included?

Thanks for enjoying my illustrious information as well as the crazy laws. I lived in Florida, too, before cars had AC and just thinking about it makes me sweat - I mean, perspire. Tell Mom I fully sympathize with her non air-conditioned child bearing.

And thanks, m'luv, for the Up and funny.


drbj profile image

drbj 18 months ago from south Florida Author

Hi, Lizzy. That's what I ask myself, too. What were those lawmakers smoking? Since obviously they were not thinking. I guess the mast height for the sailboat race would be figured for when the tide is highest. Not to worry, if they can't raise the bridges, they can lower the river.

I have not come across the crazy law re pigeons that you mention but you know I will include it when I do. Whoever is chosen to enforce that law must be very careful. You know how easily pigeons can get even!

The funniest law I remember from California is the one forbidding a person to wash his or her car with their used underwear. Is nothing sacred?

Thanks for the visit, m'dear, the Up and the kind adjectives.


drbj profile image

drbj 18 months ago from south Florida Author

Thanks, Alicia, for enjoying the various installments in my crazy law series.

Will I continue it for a long time? Of course. Until I run out of states, that is.


DzyMsLizzy profile image

DzyMsLizzy 18 months ago from Oakley, CA

When you run out of states, you can move on to individual cities; there should be enough of those to keep you in material for years to come: LOL


drbj profile image

drbj 18 months ago from south Florida Author

What a nifty idea, Lizzy. There are certain to be plenty of nifty crazy laws in most of our crazy cities. And then I could graduate to other countries. Tomorrow the world!


Faith Reaper profile image

Faith Reaper 18 months ago from southern USA

Hahaha ... what a hoot it is to read of these crazy laws. I'm wondering when there was one who proposed such crazy laws, what was the mindset of the others to go along to pass such crazy laws?

I lived in Tampa, Florida for four years when my husband was first in the Air Force back from '78 to '82 ...don't believe we ever broke any of these laws : )

That is false advertising if the women are not actually topless ...confusing.

I found your other facts included here interesting, and I agree with that last quote about August!

Up +++++ tweeting, pinning, G+ and sharing

Blessings always


pstraubie48 profile image

pstraubie48 18 months ago from sunny Florida

Hi drbj Ya' Gotta' Love Florida...of course part of why I love it here so much is because of the silliness that prevails :D

Great fun read. Voted up+++ Angels are winging their way to you...ps


mary615 profile image

mary615 18 months ago from Florida

Loved reading more about our crazy laws in my state! I call Florida "God's waiting room". I will live out my remaining days here (I think).

Thanks for mentioning my town, Stuart, since it is the Sailfish capital of the world!

Voted UP all the way!


drbj profile image

drbj 18 months ago from south Florida Author

Hi, Faith. You ask an interesting question. What was the mindset of other legislators when one of them came up with a crazy law? Your premise is erroneous, m'dear. How can there be a mindset when there is no mind? Obviously they were all sheep. No, I take that back. Sheep are smarter!

Happy to learn that you and hubby did not break any crazy laws while in Tampa. As to the false advertising re the 'not actually topless' dancers, much advertising is false in some way if only by the art of omission. As a former marketing maven, I know this from experience.

Thanks for finding the info as interesting as I did and enjoying the realistic 'August' quote as well. Love you for all your sharing ways. And blessings backatcha . . . and hubby.


drbj profile image

drbj 18 months ago from south Florida Author

I love Florida, too, Patricia, as you do in spite of all the fun I have made re their silly, crazy laws. It is still one of the best places to live as far as I know, although Hawaii is not far behind.

Thanks for the Up vote and the angels, m'dear.


drbj profile image

drbj 18 months ago from south Florida Author

Mary, m'luv, delighted to know that you enjoy living in Florida as much as I do ... despite its many crazy laws. Happy to learn that you live in such a lovely town - I have motored through it a number of times. Next time I'll have to give you a call and stop by. But I promise to warn you first!

Thanks for your visits and the Up, m'dear.


tillsontitan profile image

tillsontitan 18 months ago from New York

Not only are the laws a bit "off the beaten track" but the humor with which you write them just makes them all the more funny. Hmm, so its against the law to use beauty utensils in Florida? Are they aware of the median age of their residents? That could be scary, I know because of my age!

It would take a hub to make a really good comment about this hub. To say, again, that is amusing is such an understatement. Well done, and a great way to start my Monday morning.

Voted up, useful, funny, awesome, and interesting. Pinned too so others might enjoy.

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