The 3 Circles of Life. A Psychological profile of Society.

The 3 Circles of Life

Family, Friends, and Work
Family, Friends, and Work | Source

Living within the Circles

The smaller the circles of one's life, the greater the perceived lifetime fulfillment becomes.

The Circles of our life determine how much of our dreams are fulfilled.

There are only three (3) circles of life that each of us travel in.

We move easily from one circle to another. And most of us quickly learn how to successfully intermix them all, simultaneously.

They are:

  • 1. The Family Circle: We are born into this circle without personal choice
  • 2. The Circle of Friends: Made through our personal choices of those most compatible to ourselves.
  • 3. The Work Circle: Those who surround us at work out of necessity

The "Family" circle is separate unto itself since the ties that bind us together in this circle are by blood connections. It can consist of family members that are also good friends, and who also work with us in our employment field.

The "Friends" circle are those we choose to allow to enter into our private lives, personal dreams, and who share our basic thoughts, beliefs, and secrets. We classify them as someone who knows all about us, but likes us anyway.

The "Work" circle consists of those who share the same employment experience with us. They can include family and friends, and/or outsiders - but usually are limited only to the work experience.

Everyone we come in contact with influences us in one way or another.

The 3 layers of every circle

The three layers of each circle: Core, Inner Circle, and the Outer Circle
The three layers of each circle: Core, Inner Circle, and the Outer Circle | Source

Behind the walls

All the members of these three circles are intertwined yet remain separate.

There are internal and external pressures associated with each circle.

Each of the 3 circles of life consist of 3 layers:

  • A. The Core: The "self' being the center of all 3 circles
  • B. The Inner Circle: The closest to our core consists of family members (parents, siblings, grand parents, aunts and uncles.
  • C. The Outer Circle: includes in-laws, distant cousins, great uncles & aunts, and our network of friends, etc..

The dangers of expanding, or shrinking, the inner circles:

  • Expanding strengthens by increasing numbers of family, friends, and work contemporaries.
  • Shrinking numbers by death, or by choice, weakens the strength of the bonds between members. However they can also increase the bonds as well.

Within the Walls

There are dangers, and threats, to be wary of as well, within these walls.

There will always be "liars" and "thieves" who are constantly testing our fortitude and who will try to control our lives.

Being the center of our own circles also brings more responsibilities toward others and how they will react to our personal attitudes, strengths and weaknesses.

The most important thing to always try to remember is that the "only things we can actually control are our own thoughts, actions and deeds - nothing else.

And instinctively knowing that trying to do so, is inappropriate and unacceptable.

Pitfalls of self confinement

Making a conscious choice to remain strictly within the 3 circles of our lives has a downside, or a 'caveat".

A warning that is often unheeded.

It allows for the perception that what we are, is all that there is to be.

In some instances that may be quite true; but to refuse to expand our worlds can cheat us out of wonderful new experiences of being able to actually learn and enjoy the diversity that the world offers.

It embraces the epitome of limiting one's bliss to nescience ( the lack of knowledge or expansion of awareness).

Outside the circles

Can a life be "fulfilled" outside the 3 circles of life?

The answer is both Yes and No.

Yes, if those living outside the circles can reconcile the greater (expanded) outlooks of life, to the limitations of remaining within the circles.

By having this ability to become interactive, they remain separate entities, but shared by the person capable of accepting diversity as something to be cherished and valued and experienced.
People with this ability must be able to compartmentalize both worlds and learn to not let either one over power the others..

The caveat to embracing this choice as a life course, however, introduces the possibility of being rejected by those who still reside solely in your original 3 circles of life.

Rather than viewing it as "growth" or "expansion of knowledge" they often see it as being a traitor to tradition and move their loyalties to someone else, more in tune with their psychological "level".

It's not over yet

The final transition

Realistically, many people personally experience these transitions several times in their lives; as experienced by this writer; and they include, but are not limited to the following transitions:

--Being the first of a family to achieve a college degree was seen by family and friends as deliberately moving away from them and their chosen paths.

Thus changing forever the Circle of Family.

--After college, when starting to work as a "professional" it was perceived by friends, many of whom were considered "laborers", "factory workers", or "blue collar" classes, as moving beyond them .

Thus changing forever the Circle of Friends.

--Transitioning from a 'professional work" staff member to supervision, and becoming the "boss" of the other staff members, brought about further isolation from them as a class, or group of workers.

Thus changing forever the Circle of Work.

Diamonds vs Glass

The transition from the work field to retirement can be a profound change in one's life as well.

The price of "transitioning" through one's life from one level to another can be rewarding, or deleterious, when one reaches retirement without the long term relationships with friends and family that most people experience throughout their lifetimes.

Fortunately the good usually outweighs the bad, and after all is said and done it is time to return to the old (and familiar) ''family'' and ''friends'' circles once again.

They too have grown and matured. We all experience the return to the same status of being equals once again in our old age.

We can peacefully return to our "roots" knowing that riches gained (the diamonds) were no more important to our lives than what we end up with (the glass).

For in the end, we can't take either of those things with us on our "Final Transition" - out of this world.

by: d.william 11/28/2013

Are you fulfilling your own life's destiny

Have you done all you can do to help your fellow man?

  • yes
  • no
  • i have no desire to help anyone but myself
  • No one helped me so why should i help anyone else
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Jo_Goldsmith11 profile image

Jo_Goldsmith11 3 years ago

This is some amazing and insightful reading! wow. I actually get this. I am wondering however, if we by choice break the link to the part of a circle as far as family goes. Because it is something we must do, in order to follow our destiny and more importantly have peace of mind! How would the break in this link affect later on, after I go into the next life?

Awesome, interesting, beautiful! Up +++ and shared + tweet.

Great reading..thank you. :-)

Eiddwen profile image

Eiddwen 3 years ago from Wales

So very interesting and thank you so much for sharing. Voting up for sure.


Nadine May profile image

Nadine May 3 years ago from Cape Town, Western Cape, South Africa

This is an interesting topic and I reminded me of my article on our Personal, Community and Global Awareness Levels. I know I'm living what I call my soul purpose, I just use different words. Thank you for an interesting read .


Minnetonka Twin profile image

Minnetonka Twin 3 years ago from Minnesota

This really made sense to me and I found it really interesting. I feel strongly that I'm living my life with fullness and it was really empowering to see that as I read the article.

My sis and I were the first family members to get a Master's degree in our family of origin. What you wrote about that really tied with this experience. Great hub-I'm sharing this captivating and informative article.

d.william profile image

d.william 3 years ago from Somewhere in the south Author

Jo: Thanks for being the first to read and comment.

Yes, you are correct that we do break the circle of family deliberately at times, for negative reasons:

family feuding, marrying into a family that is disliked by our immediate family, or marrying someone who dislikes our family for some reason, etc..

But mostly we stay within our family units throughout our lives, and those we connect with by marriage are brought into our family circle, and we, in turn, are welcomed into theirs.

So we actually can belong to more than one "family circle" on different levels; or "friends circle" if we have groups of friends with totally different interests; or even our "work circles" if we hold two jobs.

When you mention "going into the next life" i am not sure how you meant that question. The 'next life' meaning a second marriage (or more), or the 'next life' meaning after death?

One can only imagine that as spirits we still belong to 'familiar' groups, or perhaps as spirits we all are member of the oneness, so there would be no divisions on that plane of existence.

According to John Edwards (the psychic) we have families in the after life the same as we do in this life. We will just have to wait to discover that one.

d.william profile image

d.william 3 years ago from Somewhere in the south Author

Eiddwen: Thanks for reading and leaving a comment. I appreciate it.

d.william profile image

d.william 3 years ago from Somewhere in the south Author

Nadine: Thanks so much for reading and your thoughtful input. I just finished reading your hub on the 3 levels of awareness. Great job. I can't wait to read more of your works.

d.william profile image

d.william 3 years ago from Somewhere in the south Author

Minnetonka: Thank you so much for your kind words. I am happy you liked the article and could relate to it. That makes my day.

always exploring profile image

always exploring 3 years ago from Southern Illinois

This is a remarkable rendition of our life circles. I can relate. I was the only one out of twelve children to go to collage. I find that family is really the core of stability. I had some wonderful friends while in the workforce, but we drifted apart as time moved on. Over time, as we reach out and learn outside the family circle, we grow in tolerance and love for all people. I feel enriched with the circle of friends i have in the hub community. Thank you for a thoughtful and enlightening article.

d.william profile image

d.william 3 years ago from Somewhere in the south Author

always: thanks for your input. "Family" is certainly the most rewarding of the circles we live in. There is nothing as wonderful as the closeness of families who have learned to share their lives with other members of their blood family.

Unfortunately, families can be torn apart by one or two family members who are just plain rotten to the core and who have never learned how to get along with others, or to 'share' rather than 'control'. (i am referring to my own).

Once family members drift apart, it is almost impossible to recover from that loss.

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