Bits of Wisdom and Words to Live By

• I have found that my life flows much more smoothly if I stick to this. Sort all people into three groups, and keep each group as it is meant to be. The first group are simply acquaintances. These are people that you have met or been introduced to, but do not really know very well. These people, or this group of people may or may not eventually get mixed into one of the other two groups, as you get to know them better, but until that time, they must maintain themselves in this group.

• The second group, associates are people that you know a little bit better, and trust to the extent of doing business with them. These are people that you trust to take money from you to go to the store, and you know that they will return with the food items, and your correct change. This group of people also can be trusted with private information or knowledge, and will not use it against you, or for example to get a job application in at a certain place before you can.

• The third and most important group as far as life is concerned, are the family and close friends. This is the group of people that you either picked to be your friends, or were born related to whether or not you like them. This group is the most trustworthy and loyal group of people you know. These are also the one that you know, whether or not you are mad at each other, will come to your aid no matter what. These are the ones that will always worry about you, and check to see if you have food, make sure that everything is secure and safe, make sure that your car is not out of gas, and so on. These people are so loyal in fact, that even if you have not spoken because of some fight long ago or not, if you are being hurt, or if you are in real trouble, they will be there to help you, putting all emotional or physical disputes aside. They love you, unconditionally.

 Keeping these three groups separate in your life and in your mind as you go through your daily routines, will help you keep difficulties to a bare minimum.

• Do not complain about how bad your neighbors yard smells or looks if your yard or house is also dirty or stinking. You cannot judge others for doing something, or not doing something you are guilty of yourself.

• To your own self be true. This means many different things to many people. I believe that it means that you should not lie to yourself, or kid yourself about things. I believe that it means that you must care for yourself mentally and physically before you can even begin to think about helping others. Think about it seriously, and determine what this means to you and in your life.

• Idle hands make the devils workshop. Always let your kids do those things that they like to do, and those things that keep their minds busy, for example if they like to make and fly kites, not only allow them to do this, but pay for anything they might need in order to do it. These activities include but are not confined to sports, hobbies computer activities, games, or any fun activity that they love to do with friends, family or alone. Remember, it is definitely less expensive to pay for hobbies or activities now, than it would be to pay for rehabilitation later on in their lives.

• If a person has the moral fibre that would allow him or her to tell you a small lie, then those same morals will allow that person to do other things like steal, or cheat, just a little. Just because someone cheats a little bit, do not fool yourself into believing that it stops there, for a sin is a sin is a sin.

• If you have a problem with someone, be adult enough to go to him and tell him directly and to his face what it is that is bothering you. Telling others about it behind his back will not help solve the problem, but will actually make it worse. Be honest, careful to say exactly what you mean, and in the same manner give this person the opportunity to respond to this problem in the same manner.

• If you have a question or problem that you need to discuss, or need an answer to, find an old person to talk to for they are wise and are a bounty of information if you just listen to them.

• Your best defense is offense. If you are having a dispute with someone, you can be sure that by going forward toward that person in an offensive manner, you are not letting them be offensive towards you, as they have been put into the position of defending themselves, instead of coming at you offensively. I learned this very simple rule of nature by playing chess with my grandmother when I was about 6 or 7 years old. She told me at that time, life is just like a game of chess, and when playing the game of life, remember that the rules are equivalent in that when you put someone in the position of retreating, they cannot move forward towards you at the same time.

• If people could show as much love and loyalty as our dogs do, this world would be a perfect place. Our pets love us unconditionally, and will protect you and your belongings even if you have not fed them, have treated them badly, or have neglected them completely.

• You can train an animal to do most anything, especially if it is an action that comes naturally to the animal in the first place, just by giving them encouragement, and telling them that they are good. For example, pulling a string, for a cat is something that they love to do anyway, and if you attach the string to something else, causing a second action by pulling that string, and by encouraging the cat each time he successfully pulls it, telling him , oh what a good cat, what a good kitty, and perhaps dropping one of his favorite treats also, it will only take a few times before that cat is an expert at string pulling, even if the string is connected to a pulley that opens a door, or turns on a light. It looks very impressive, but indeed is a very simple act.

• Do not reinforce something negative constantly to your child, for example I have heard parents tell other adults that "Tommy does not like carrots". After hearing this over and over, whether or not Tommy has ever even tasted carrots before, he will confirm the fact that he does not like carrots, if he hears it often enough.

• Be consistent when teaching your child the rules you expect him to follow. If you allow the child to do something sometimes, and discipline him for that very same act another time it only makes for confusion as to what he is allowed to do.

• If you want something done, the best way to approach the task, is to begin to do it yourself. The best leaders in history have all led by example. Giving an order to do something but being unwilling to step forward and do it yourself shows poor leadership skills, and rarely will get the task done.

• Faith is knowing that you can trust and rely on things that you cannot prove or see.

• The first step in achieving anything is always the hardest one to take.

• Teenagers equate boundaries and rules with love. A change in rules, or when a rule is not enforced, the teenager will equate this with weakness or a lack of caring. If you do not enforce a curfew for example, this is interpreted to mean that you do not care, therefore you do not love him. Anything that is given to a teenager instead of him having earned it, will not be appreciated, or therefore taken care of. Easy come easy go applies very much.

• Daily structure is a must. A routine that goes as follows gives a teenager good habits--- get up fairly early, 8 or 9 o'clock, get dressed, eat, personal hygiene, and chores at the beginning of the day is an absolute must. If you do not instill these habits, you can expect your teen to grow into a lazy, sloppy and messy person, as well as having a procrastination problem.

  Do not be negative--if you constantly say I cannot do this, you wont be able to. Proclaim the positive things in your life that you would like to achieve and good things will be in store for you.