A comical sex change for the better
As Sung To The Tune of : Old Time Rock And Roll by Bob Seager and the Silver Bullet Band
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~O->
Here's a solution for Afghanistan,
it way past time to try a different plan,
let's concentrate on finding only one man,
who hides so cowardly in Pakistan.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~O->
Let's train our death row inmates how to be
the perfect moles among the insurgency,
they'll learn the lingo and then Hollywood,
will make them up to look like boys from Bin's hood.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~O->
Then they'll infiltrate just a few at a time,
till there are hundreds of them on Bin's front line,
each with a promise in the back of thier minds,
if they succeed we'll pardon them of their crimes.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~O->
They'll capture Bin Laden alive.....unharmed
and when they've got him handcuffed, and unarmed
They'll spirit him away without alarm
to lead a new life that will match his charm.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~O->
We'll send him off to Sweden where they'll take
away the balls he does not have, and make
Bin undergo a sex change, then he'll be
a Bimbo Laden who will never be free.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~O+
We'll feed Bin hormones until he grows breasts
the size that Afghan men all love the best
His big brown eyes will glare from his smooth face
now free from hair, he'll face his next disgrace
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~O+
We'll drape him all in black from head to toe
with veils and covered flesh...a fashion show
then on him we'll tattoo a big surprise
A U.S. flag inside his hairless thighs
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~O+
Then when he looks just like a Taliban girl
we'll fly him back across our troubled world
and leave him near the Taliban's front line
perfumed but sweaty, he'll make quite a nice find
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~O+
I'm sure he'll undergo some heavy sessions
like all Islamic women facing oppression
he'll offer them a patriotic feast
and learn the pleasures of just being a beast
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~O+
No longer leading, humbly he will bow
they'll bend him over, and they'll teach him how
and maybe he'll know in his twisted brain
the way they treat their females is insane
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~O+
He'll cry to Allah through a blur of pain
to grant him pardon but he will remain
a she forever on the desert plain
living a life debased, and quite profane.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~O+
I'm sure eventually he'll choose to slit,
his slender girlish throat in a hissy fit,
or hang himself upon a noose tightly fit,
and then at long last we'll be done with it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~O+
