Without a Childhood II
Chapter 2, Part 1
When I was six years old, I was enrolled at Mission Valley Elementary School in Victoria, Texas. I was living with my aunt and uncle at that time. I liked the classes that I had. We learned to read and write stories. We went to music classes and computer classes. The computer classes were fun, in spite of the activities that I may have flunked. We used little red cups to get the teacher’s attention and little blue cups to indicate that we were taking a test. There was this one time that I was doing an activity on the computer and I decided to use my sister’s name just for the hell of it. When I was done with my activity, I didn’t realize that my teacher was right behind me.
“Your name’s not Jessica.” She said.
I just sat there. It wasn’t the first time I used my sister’s name in computer class, but nobody knew that. My teacher typed in some password on my computer since I flunked, yet again, another activity. I continued to do my activities on the computer before it was time to go to lunch. I had brought a Sailor Moon movie to school that day so I was looking forward to going to lunch. Some of us went back to the classroom to get our lunchboxes. My lunch was chicken nuggets and ham. I hated that combination. I hated the brand of chicken nuggets that my aunt had packed for me. I hated the way they tasted. They weren’t from McDonald’s! I also hated Peanut Butter! You’re probably thinking what kid does not like Peanut Butter? Believe me, I was quite a finicky eater. Don’t believe me? You can just ask my dad and my stepmom. I was probably more finicky than the average kid. Maybe not, but I like to exaggerate a little bit.
Anyway, my class had gone to lunch. Since I had a lunchbox with me, I went to sit down at the table my class was assigned to. It was pizza day and I was pretty darn mad about it. I tried to eat my chicken nuggets but they were extremely soggy. Yuck! So I ate my dessert instead, which was a chocolate chip cookie. I threw my nuggets away since they were so nasty and went back to the table. When everybody was finished eating, my class sat in front of the T.V and watched Sailor Moon. I was so taken in by the anime that I didn’t notice that my class had left. I ran back to my classroom. Everybody stared at me, of course, but I pretended that nothing happened and went to my seat.
After school, I went back to the cafeteria. My aunt and uncle were teachers in downtown Victoria and nobody was at home, so I ended up staying after school. That was the worst time for me as a first grader. I was always so afraid to go to that cafeteria. There were older kids there and several of them were bullies. I was always made fun of, along with my drawings. They were all in one color: pink. There was this girl that had joined the after-school program and I was minding my own business when she said how ugly it was. The picture was a pink stick person with a dress and pigtails on it. One of the ladies that was in charge of the program said to Diane, the girl, to be nice. Fat lot of good that did me. That girl never did stop taunting me and neither did the boys.
I was out playing kickball one day with the kids after school. Ms. Julie and Ms. Carrie, the two ladies that were in charge of the after-school program, was watching us from the other side of the fence that was there. I had gone up to kick the ball and I sent it far out. I had made it all the way to third and was going for the home plate when this boy named Jared came after me with the ball (which was an old soccer ball). He threw the ball in order to tag me, but he missed. I scored a point for my team, which made me really proud. However, Jared caught me by surprise and pushed me. He told me that I should have been out. Needless to say, he was scolded by one of the ladies, but that was about it. There was another time that we were playing kickball and I was walking with the rest of my team to go kick. Another boy, J.R. Moody, had the ball since he was catcher. I was approaching the plate when he decided to slam the ball into my back. Thankfully, he was pulled from the game.
One day, Ms. Julie and Ms. Carrie had brought something with them to show us. The kids had crowded around the desk that was near the cafeteria door. I had squeezed my way to the front to see what the ladies had brought. However, a boy named Jacob decided to be a jerk. He pulled me by my shirt and slammed me into the wall. He was put into the time-out chair, but that never stopped him from hurting me. I was swinging one day outside when it was our recess minding my own business when Jacob, who was sitting under the play set, decided to throw rocks at me. I was really annoyed that he would do that and threatened to tell on him. Jacob said he wouldn’t do it again. As naïve as I was then, I believed him and he continued to throw rocks at me. I gave up and just tolerated the abuse that I was suffering. I never told my aunt and my uncle what I was going through. I was way too scared to tell them and plus I thought the way I was being treated was normal. Because of my troubles, I began stealing toys and other things and I was a chronic liar. The pain and suffering that I felt continued on through my primary and secondary school years.