Missing Pieces of Life

The beginning starts with a mammogram (a mammogram is an x-ray exam of the breast that’s used to detect and evaluate breast changes). There are different schools of thought about when you should have a mammogram, some advice states that women should check every year, or they should get one when they are 40 or 50. It is conflicting information on when and how and how often one should have a mammogram. No one agrees but what is certainly known is that women of different ages (younger or older) get breast cancer. There is no mystery or puzzle about that fact.

Although, there are many articles about breast cancer, research being studied, foundations devoted to breast cancer, walks, banners, hats, ribbons, counselors, survivors, friends of survivors and more it gets real personal when it impacts on your family. You find yourself in unfamiliar territory. Once the mammogram, biopsies and the diagnosis are handed down, it gets very real and you realize that parts and pieces of your life are going to change and that there will be some missing pieces.

When breast cancer is the diagnosis you must change how you think, how you feel and how you relate to your body. Changes are going to happen. You will have an intimate knowledge of the missing parts and pieces and you feel the loss. How does one cope with missing body parts and does one still have feelings where the missing parts were? When you look in the mirror and you see the difference in your body – what goes through the mind? Do you reminisce about the changes in your body and breasts over the years? Remember the perkiness (pointed and firm) in the early years, the fullness (perfectly formed) in the prime years and then the sag and drag (the drop zone) in the mature years.

Losing pieces of your body feels similar to losing a loved one. You mourn the lost loved one, you know that person is not going to return but your love remains and you always miss them. It is a part of you that is missing forever and you mourn. You also miss the piece of the puzzle that made you who you are. No matter how skillful the surgeon is there is a hole where a vital piece of you should be and you are not complete. A piece of you is missing, one you cannot get back so this puzzle is not complete.

However, life and you must go on. That is what the survivors talk about, they bank on it and are thankful because to be a part of life is important. One can sink into depression and misery when confronted with breast cancer or one can be an inspiration to others and look forward to the future with hope.

In the final analysis a piece of the puzzle that is you might be missing but it doesn’t mean that you have to be missing. You can still be an integral part of the living, growing and nurturing of others as well as supporting and loving yourself. Every puzzle doesn’t always have every piece, sometimes, over the course of the years, you lose a piece or two of the puzzle along the way - but one can still remember how the puzzle looked when all the pieces were there.