Humour in a B Cup - Modified Again
66An email prompted me to write this hub
Yes this Hub may not have been written, were it not for an email that I received today.
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Playtex Women's Side Smoothing Plunge Underwire Bra
Price: $32.00
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Playtex Women's Nursing Underwire Bra
Price: $27.00
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Calvin Klein Women's Seductive Comfort T-Shirt Bra
Price: $44.00
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Wonderbra Women's Uprising Satin Push Up
Price: $32.00
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Bali Women's Lace Desire Embroidery Over Foam Underwire Bra #3193
Price: $34.00
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Playtex Women's Nursing Wirefree Bra
Price: $27.00
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Playtex Women's Secrets Side Smoothing Embroidered Underwire Bra #4513
Price: $32.00
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Playtex Women's Side Smoothing Underwire Bra
Price: $32.00
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The Email
Do you need a laugh??
What Religion is Your Bra?
A man walked into the ladies department of Myer's and shyly walked up to the woman behind the counter and said, 'I'd like to buy a bra for my wife. ' ' What type of bra?' asked the clerk. 'Type?' inquires the man, 'There's more than one type?' ' Look around,' said the saleslady, as she showed a sea of bras in every shape, size, colour and material imaginable.
'Actually, even with all of this variety, there are really only four types of bras to choose from .' Relieved, the man asked about the types. The saleslady replied: 'There are the Catholic, the Salvation Army, the Presbyterian, and the Baptist types. Which one would you prefer?'
Now totally befuddled, the man asked about the differences between them. The Saleslady responded, 'It is all really quite simple. .
The Catholic type supports the masses;
The Salvation Army type lifts the fallen;
The Presbyterian type keeps them staunch and upright;
The Baptist type makes mountains out of molehills.'
Have you ever wondered why A, B, C, D, DD, E, F, G, and H are the letters used to define bra sizes?
If you have wondered why, but couldn't figure out what the letters stood for, it is about time you became informed!
(A} Almost Boobs...
{B} Barely there...
{C} Can't Complain!..
{D} Dang!...
{DD} Double dang!...
{E} Enormous!...
{F} Fake...
{G} Get a Reduction...
{H} Help me, I've fallen and I can't get up!...
Well the truth is out
There goes all the mystic and wonderment we males have had throughout our reaching puberty and attaining maturity.
This I am sure really somes up the the great upliftment.
News Updates
I have been informed that bra's also come from countries, for those people (who wear bras) that have objections to the their intimate support be likened to their religious practise, and therefore might find that they have to change their religion to accommodate their breast.
American Bra - Supports the underprivileged masses
Russian Bra - Uplifts the masses
French Bra - Turns them into Art works
German Bra - Stopzthemfloppinground
Wonderbra - makes mountains out of mole hills! I too can sport cleavage
Old South Africa bra - Separates the masses
Unsophisticated bra - Over the shoulder, bolder holder
Italian Bra - Plain and sensible
The Atomic Bra - 90% Fallout
The mysteries of life Explained
We men are relatively easy to understand, we are set in motion by a simple Switch either On or Off.
However a Woman, ......... well you need to have that Owners Guide.
You have seen the highs
Well the high points of eye candy have been shown, this inspired another hubber and fan with a good sense of fun, to post a hub.
Now you can experience another side of eye candy, or should I say we have reached the bottom of this expose!
Thanks Sheena, http://hubpages.com/hub/New-Fashion-TrendsOr-Not
PrintShare it! — Rate it: up down flag this hub
Comments
Will you spit at me if I ask whether this is a non-fiction hub?
Princessa, you may call it what is Dang Baptist or any other choice. The Bra manufacturers would most probably prefer another, more prosy type of description.
Benson being a medical type I would not spit on you, this is pure unadulterated fiction, with a dash of beauty.
Thanks for the comments.
Very funny story, Rodney. It reminds me of one of our local stores:
The shop is called "The Bust Stop". It's a wonderful store full of religions of all kinds, even one made of coins that stretches from one end of the store to the other. I wish there was a way for you to see their commercials. Just a line from their theme song, "If you're sagging and you know it, come to us..." Very funny. Anyway, while I was in there one day, an employee answered the phone and literally turned red trying to keep her composure. We had to ask what was so funny when she got off the phone. Turns out a man was calling because his wife was pregnant and needed a larger bra. A MUCH larger bra, as he put it. He said he had no idea women could get that big. As it happened, she needed a 34 C. The rest of us in there had passed that in high school!
thanks for the laugh though the pictures here are seriously no laughing matter! LOL :D
Love the rating system A-H. Fun hub. Thanks! MM
I'm B, so does in mean it's barely there? L.O.L Anyway, men have no right to complain coz it's a favor to allow them a good breastfeeding. L.O.L again :)
Proud Mom, Sounds like I am missing out on an excellent advert. Try and record the advert on tape, and then you can email it to me. Else video record it and download it on youtube, then we can all enjoy it.
Chris, thanks for appreciating art!
MM, I think that the ratings are fair and adequately expressive also.
Sheena, thanks for allowing us a good feeding. LOL ;-)
Thankds guys and gutesses for the comments.
Really fun coming from you...Mr serious all the time guy...G-Ma :O) Hugs & Peace
G-Ma, will try and be less stuffy and publish some fun ones as well, thanks for the comment.
Now I'm like your little green mate Rodney and all atwitter.
Old Firm, I was all t'w'itter when writing this, especially when adding the photos. Thanks for the comment.
As they say in Zimbabwe a tiitter ran through the court!
Great Hub but are you perhaps making mountains out of mole hllls. LOL
No, I actually thought I was trying to uplift the masses.
Thanks for the comments Sixty, all both of them LOL :-0)
hahahah. I still laugh at this one just scanning it. thanks for the laughs!
and of course, you guys are welcome. Where would you be without the feeds? L.O.L
Sheena, it is good to have a view of these things.
A song from my youth many many years ago, I think it was political folk song,The line went something like this.
Excuse if i appear to stare
but my eyes cant rest
on a woman's breast
with equanimity.
So there you have it!
Wasn't that a pygmy, sos?
Moll Hill? I remember her well! Always sang flat in the back row of the chorus, and never let out a squeak in the back row of the cinema. As they say in la leche, "Anything more than a mouthful is surplus to requirements!"
Old Firm, yes methinks you are correct. Thanks for the comment
Love it Rod, just love it. Great pix too. woo-hoo hic-hic too much of sheena's drink
Thanks CC glad that you enjoyed the tipple.
Tof yes of course but the pygmy was just sucking up. the titter was having a slap up good time!
Ah are the tow of you now laking about a bit of S&T. A bit of storm in the "C' cup.
Great stuff Rodney. I especially liked the letter-szes explained, and the switches image.
Rodney you have me giggling. Since weaning my son I was relieved to knock the double off my dang, but if I keep losing weight I'll have nothing to complain about! ;)
CW, glad you enjoyed the hub, the switches are a bit of a puzzle as I do not have my owners manual.
There was one attacherd when I got , however it was Blank, a pale pink A4 sheet with nothing on it. I discarded it and fater clearing out the recycle bin, was told that the instructions were on the sheet, you only had to change the font colour. Talk about devious.
Patricia, congrats on your baby, and glad you have given him the right start in life! Well lets hope you get to the size you wish to be. Send progress reports.
The hub has been reupdated as new information has come to light.
Hilarious!!! Absolutely Hilarious!!! How creative this hub is and it is written by a man.:) I am C so that certainly makes me happy , you are right I can't complain.:)
AEvans, Iam glad you appreciate the hub and found it to be hilarious, was fun writing it and remembering some of the older jokes about them.
We do need to lend support to all you females on the hubs.
Great hub Rodney.Got a great laugh out of your humor!
CS, I am pleased that you enjoyed the humor and liked the hub. thanks for dropping in.
Rodney, you must check these out and tell what size they are.
How funny is this? You made my day.
Very uplifting hub.
CC the site was amazing I have given a suitable comment on the other hub, but a consrervative guess would 'EEEE" that is correct 4E's, I am sure .
Karen, I do agree that it is quite funny, glad you enjoyed your day after this hub1 lol.
Rochelle, yes it does seem to be an uplifting hub. This brings me to postscript that should have appeared in the main body of this hub - I forgot about untill reading your comment.
It is set in a convent, a very strict convent, I might add.
A novice, seeks an audience with Mother Superior, but refuses to to discuss her need for the audience with the Second in charge.
So after a couple of days, Mother Superior summonses the Novice to her study.
After all the due formalities of greeting and the adherence to the protocols, the Mother Superior requests that the Novice proceeds with what it was the was that caused the Novice to seek her guidance.
The Novice, blushing and as shamefaced looked down at the floor and uttered "Mother Superior, my bra needs changing as it is too small", stammered the Novice.
Mother Superior sternly gazed across her desk, stood up and in a very firm voice, "You had better say three Hail Marys, as a penance for using such luangage in this Sacred Place, come back to me after you have learned the proper manner in which to address this problem".
The chastened, Novice duly went to the chapel and said her Hail Marys and then office of the day thrown in for good measure. While reading the Office and the following the Old Testament Lesson for the day, she was inspired.
A day later she again approached Mother Superior for an audience.
When this was granted and the protocols adhered to Mother Superior again asked the Novice to state her request.
The Novice with a touch of temerity, said"Mother Superior, My cups runneth over".
Haha. good one Rodney. BTW Benson has linked you on his new hub
Thanks CC and Benson will have a look see.
On a relatd matter of you aforementioned joke of the Nun, did you know how the Pope was so upset when he made the edict of celebacy? He mourned for days and kept mumbling how they had left out the 'R'. After several days someone finally asked him what he meant. They left the 'R' out of celebrate! he told them. LOL
CC that is the problem of having to have others spell check, I suppose.
Thanks Irish Bread, for the comments, I am also a breast man myself, my only stipulation is that they be whatever size the are as long as they are real.
If I wanted tupperware I would look in the fridge.LOL
Princessa says:
10 months ago
Thanks for the laugh... I suppose now I can say my bra is a "Dang Baptist" LOL