It's Good To Be Alive
Updated on October 28, 2010
The unknown muffled rantings
I can’t make them out
Don’t want to –
don’t want to hear
Mommy and daddy shouldn’t
talk like that
So I tried to play
in the corner with a truck
Or with my GI Joe
to the racket
playing against my walls
But time moved along…
*
I’m watching cartoons
on Saturday
My day – the day
just for me
But the tv channel changed
I didn’t understand
And I couldn’t change
it back to Bugs Bunny
It was as if I didn’t exist
and I guess I didn’t
But time moved along…
*
And I used to cry
and scream and try
Try to tell
what was going on
inside my mind
But either my words
weren't right
Or maybe I was just wrong
*
And back to my room it would end
To where I’d pretend
maybe I could really feel
That the thing that was wrong - was me
And nothing was real.
I would escape to lands that
I had created pretend
Where there were my friends
And I’d walk alone in the woods
Escape within my thoughts
Whenever wherever I could
Then, then, then and up until now even.
*
Was I alone?
I don’t know – I don’t know
I don’t understand
And where is my way to go
My path to become a man?
My dad was the man that I am
so hard to break that
Now I can see and understand
But that’s not the life that I want
Forgive me but just to survive
it isn't enough for anyone
I need to do more than provide.
*
My love, she waited for me
What did she see?
On that I’m still unclear
unclear running over 30 years
And I ran much the same way
my daddy showed me
But it wasn’t for me.
And after I’d run out and hide
When I came back
She was waiting for me.
*
I know that my rhymes are bad
And this message is
cloudy misunderstood
The fault has always been me
Now I can see – Now I can see
It’s not meant to be
It's not who I am
or where I plan to be going
*
While there is still time
I’m trying to change
to what I am and who I was
Both are exactly the same
*
Now I won't hide
in the woods
not anymore
She understands
she understands
ME
*
Mommy and daddy have died
And we have cried,
buried their lives
Now it’s a time to grow,
time to show
How we survive,
no thrive
I look to her at my side,
my beautiful wife
my beautiful life
And I really see -
It’s good to be alive.
Just as I am.