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Love is a doing thing. Do it now.

Updated on January 29, 2011

Love really is something you do.

When we feel the desire to do something that makes our loved ones lives easier or more fun, what we are feeling is real love.

Children learn about love in many ways.

My grandchildren watch TV. Yes even the three year old girls. My daughter let's them watch chosen children's shows while she makes dinner or works at her online business.

They are free to go in to the backyard and play if they want to, and often do just that. Tiny TV critics!

The point is, the TV they are watching is always wonderful. Full of fun combined with gentle intelligent teaching. I feel sure that these re-enforcing messages of love from the likes of the Muppets helps kids to recognise a little of their natural narcissism, and measure the rewards of empathy and sharing. Your babies do the maths.

Constant cuddles from mom and dad are expected, reinforced and sanctioned by Television shows. They will measure your performance against the many shows like the Muppets that are showing how it should be. If you are naughty you are simply shown a better way, not yelled at.

Double love!

hear no evil.... or my twin sister will hit you!
hear no evil.... or my twin sister will hit you!

Kids pick up a very important element of love watching their parents doing loving things for each other.Doing something for others is also the fast track for adults to learn more about being a lover, that is a giver of love.

A simple example would be Dad helping mum do the dishes. What is learnt? Love. They share the load. Daddy loves Mummy, see he is helping her and she is happy, or see mummy loves Daddy whenever she is helping him.

Doing things for your loved one is a wonderful thing for kids to observe.

They get it straight away.

Taking the load off your partner demonstrates your motive and reasoning very clearly to children.They have already equated "helping" with good things a long time earlier.

It makes a connection for a child who has had the usual inputs.

Being around parents who are loving and older kids who promote caring and teach values children soak it up, because they can see and sense that it pleases and is reciprocal as clearly shown to them on TV shows from sesame street to Diego..

When I say mom and dad, i do not mean only conventional families.

Any form of family will do. The real romance of love is in doing for your loved ones. I think many moms have tried to teach this to their men.

Love not slavery.


I fear this love giving has been under-valued for too long and women rightly see housekeeping and home making as slavery when partners take all that effort for granted. if you both live in the same nest, both should look after it. .

Flowers and chocolate move over, helping out is much more romantic.

If she or he love flowers and chocolate and you can afford them, lovely, but long term caring at a day to day level is much more endearing than either or both.


People on the Internet often show a real caring for their friends online, sharing all sorts of things they feel may be helpful. Same stuff. Just make sure it happens at home too.

Real self worth.


If you have a healthy desire to help, it demonstrates a deep self worth.

It is powerful stuff.

The psychology Of love is so simple in truth, If you love someone, thinking of their need and fulfilling them is no hardship.

The world view of love has like many things been bastardised by advertisers to make money.

If you can get past all the promotions based around so-called love... the commercial use of the word and feelings to make money, the Coca Cola adds , the car and house buying adds you will be a lot saner about love than much of the world.

Love does not go to these ideas based around ownership, beauty, power, money or any of the other views that water love down and make it cheap and meaningless.

When you show your love by doing, run a check on yourself.

Is your doing really for the other or for yourself?

Of course you are doing It for yourself in the higher sense of self, and it is fine to do it for your higher self if that means doing a selfless thing for others.

In the final analysis love is always about self love, but self love is never about the ego driven desire to get what you want.

Self love is more like the love that we feel towards children. They reflect love when it is given like a mirror, and it is in being the instigator of a loving act who has the best real love in their lives. A reality based good self worth.

I may be a lousy writer, and even worse Internet marketer, but as I am a very successful grandfather who knows why I give my time to 3 and 4 year old, I have a good self worth at this level, and hey, kids are big time in my life so I feel self love from the knowledge that I do one important thing well.


Real self love, the non ego driven type that allows us to love others and ourselves grows with every act of love.

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