MARRIAGES & Affairs Part II

MARRIAGES & Affairs

Part II

It takes a lot of hard diligent serious work for restoration of a marriage! One needs to humbly confess, submit to God's principles for marriage and sincerely repent! Don’t use the blame game. To sincerely repent you must change your actions and direction. You now commit to take responsibility for your actions. Affairs signify a betrayal of love and trust! Your spouse's feelings need to be acknowledged and validated. Accept blame for your part! It is important to allow your spouse time to heal and reconcile their hurt. Allow forgiveness to do its work. Forgiveness does not mean forgetting… it means acknowledging the action and moving forward past the pain and letting go of the resentment. This is what frees the offended one of the hurts and or shame… Although difficult; each spouse is responsible for handling the forgiveness process in a godly manner.

The Word of God is powerful! It is “ALIVE”! “Once you were alienated from God and were enemies in your minds because of evil behavior. But NOW He has reconciled you by Christ’s physical body through death to present you Holy in His sight, without blemish and free from accusation – IF you continue in your FAITH, established and firm, not moved from the hope of the Gospel. This is the Gospel that you heard and that has been proclaimed to every creature…” Colossians 1.

Before accepting Jesus Christ as your personal Savior we are alienated from God and His way of thinking. God has designed marriage as a committed monogamous union between a man and a woman to have their marital needs fulfilled. There is power when two are united in mind, body and Spirit for the Lord! Marriage is honored by God! “Let this mind be in you! That was also in Christ Jesus!” Philippians 2. We are to sincerely strive to have the attitude of Jesus! Marriage is symbolic of His dedication to His Church!

Wrong thinking leads us away from God and His principles. Sin is anything that separates us from God. We never get to the point that we can do without the Lord. This is why we all need a Savior to help us from allowing sin to reign in our lives. God wants to be a part of every area of our lives. God can help us in our marriages. This is why it is so very important to know His Word for yourself. To build an ongoing personal intimate relationship with the Lord through Jesus Christ!

Sex was created as the ultimate way for a man and woman to physically express themselves to the one you love and commit to marry! So the two can again become united as one; you actually made a vow that included God! To become one flesh in a way that is not possible like no other! Or did you? There is an unexplainable oneness that takes place… Many believers separate the Lord from their sex life as though He is not aware of what is happening…in some instances satan deceives them into thinking their gift is enough and overrides the sin. Not knowing they are in a carnal seducing mode rather than in a spiritual drawing mode by the Holy Spirit. This is the case when they participate in sex outside of marriage. There is a difference. No wonder we have so much chaos and confusion going on all about us! Adopting God’s principles in regards to sex can result in a fulfilling rewarding healthy secure marriage and a closer walk with the Lord!

God’s design is for one man and one woman was not only for procreation but for unity and pleasure! “Let your fountain be blessed, and rejoice with the wife of your youth… Let her breasts satisfy you at all times; and always be enraptured by her love.” Proverbs 5. Desire is natural and God has provided the proper way that your natural desires can be met! As a matter of fact marriage comes with a spiritual BLESSING. God sanctions the marital bed! Many are unfulfilled because they do not acknowledge the Lord’s Word in this area! Did you know? “The marriage bed is undefiled.” Hebrew 14.

God never intended for sex to be an emotionless, prudish, unfulfilling experience or mere duty. There is an entire book in the Old Testament: “The Song of Solomon”it is a wonderful candidly expressive book! It is full of poetic prose expressing the beauty of sexual expression between man and wife! There is much here for one to ponder. Pray and meditate on it and ask the Lord to lead you! God looks on the heart and knows your heart! All His promises are true! All means ALL! This is not a forbidden area where He is not concerned! We can TRUST HIM in every area of our lives!

Many married couples have not allowed God into this area of their lives. An affair is a clear indication that someone is not listening to the Lord! There are consequences for sexual sins. Therefore one must readily confess and repent! If you are here: know this greatly impedes and hinders your ability to minister effectively… Take some time and allow the Lord to “spiritually cleanse you.” God’s Word is powerful! His Holy Spirit is ever present. You just really need to sincerely repent, invite Him in and ask to be cleansed and filled with His Holy Spirit! Repent means to turn to Him! Not to repeat!

*Repeated incidences of infidelity strongly infer you are electing to practice sexual sin and is blatant disobedience! You are in fact living outside the will of the Lord!

*REPENTANCE is an important step in marriage restoration! If you have faltered in this area cleave to the Lord! Keep looking up and go forward in the Lord…

It is important to know you are never alone! God is Omnipresent and everywhere you are! “Trust in the Lord with ALL your heart and lean not to your own understanding. In ALL your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your path….” Proverbs 3. Leaning not to your own understanding means to do things GOD's way not to fulfill the lusts of the flesh! Again, to acknowledge HIM in all your ways means ALL!!! Wherever you are GOD knows! He is the Giver and sustainer of life. He knows what has happened, what is happening and what will be! Begin to be transparent with Him. He can strengthen you wherever you are weak! This is why we need Jesus Christ as our Savior and Lord! You must "Confess and repent!" He can take any hurt, pain and sin and heal you from the inside out!

Transparency and intimacy brings trust, security and passion to your marriage! By working as a united team you both mutually seek to fulfill the responsibility of having your emotional and physical needs met within the boundaries of marriage! You embrace God’s principles and are open to Him. He fulfills the void in you that is only meant for HIM! Here is where True “oneness” in marriage can be developed. God honors your marriage and commitment! A loving, committed caring marriage yields stability! When your physical needs are met you have healthier boundaries! You respect your marriage and the marriages of others as well by doing so you honor God!

This world is satiated with sex and many men and woman as well as youth are confused! In developing a strong healthy marriage it is here in the light of transparency your strengths and weaknesses surface. Together you can seek to learn how to help one another grow and rise above your weaknesses! Focusing on your strengths rather than your weaknesses yields personal growth and self empowerment! This allows your strengths to eventually overshadow them and spiritual growth becomes possible. This is what growing towards the ongoing process of maturity is all about; and results in a securer improved marriage relationship and closer walk with the Lord. Our teens even more so today need committed marriage role models!

Don’t be fooled! The world encourages sex outside of marriage! "Do you own thing," Sleep with as many people as you want... No big deal! Spiritually we know that something much deeper than “just sex” is taking place. Don't continue to give parts of you away...You cannot undo what has been done. But you can now “Press forward towards the mark...” God knows when you are truly sincere! A commitment to God, His principles, Honesty and Respect are crucial! Seeking ways to build a bridge rather than embrace destructive ways that serve to destroy and tear down your relationship as well as your character is far better. Here is what the WORD of GOD teaches us about marriage! Take some time to read, ponder, meditate and digest!

"Wives submit to your OWN husbands, as to the LORD. For the husband is the head of the wife, as also "Christ is The Head of the CHURCH" and He is The Savior of the body. Therefore just as the CHURCH is subject to Christ, so let the wives be subject to their own husbands in everything. Husbands love your wives, just as Christ also loved the CHURCH and gave Himself for her, that HE might sanctify and cleanse Her with the washing of Water by the WORD, that HE might present her to Himself a glorious CHURCH, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be Holy and without blemish. So husbands ought to LOVE their OWN wives as their OWN bodies; he who LOVES his wife LOVES himself..." Ephesians 5.

This is easier said than done. There is much spiritual warfare to separate marriages and families... Each spouse must pray fervently and seek the Lord for direction! Submission in marriage should be mutual! A husband that truly honors God will not take advantage of his wife. A wife that truly honors God will not take advantage of her husband. Manipulation will destroy your marriage! The key ingredient that is missing in most marriages today is the absence of submitting to God's will and way for marriage! Too many have embraced worldly ways and standards for marriage! It is through Jesus Christ the Fruit of His Spirit can flourish in our hearts, marriages and homes! True success is submitting to God's will and way!

A "Covenant Marriage" is an invaluable spiritual treasure! it is a sacred solemn agreement between one man and one woman. The only person you can change is you! Help is always available! God truly is able! His Holy Spirit is dear and near! Give up "Me-ness for We-ness!" The Christian marriage is a Spiritual Triangle sanctioned by God! It takes three to become one spiritually! "What God has joined together let not man put asunder!" To GOD Be The GLORY!