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PLAY WITH THE CARDS YOU ARE DEALT

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By fastfreta


What's wrong with you

What's wrong with you? No, seriously, what's wrong with you, or better still, what do you think is wrong with you? Are you...............a man of short stature, an unusually tall woman? What about your ears, have they been compared to Dumbo's, your nose, has it been call bulbous, flat, or too pointy? Are your feet considered too big for your size, or flat, maybe you think your legs are too little, or too big. Another thing your figure, maybe no matter how much weight you lose, or gain,(yes I said gain), you'll never look like Beyonce, Jennifer Anniston, or never even achieve the look that you are striving for. Then there's your head, have you been called pea head, basketball head? Your hands, men, do they say that you have "girly" hands, and women, what about you, man hands, is that what they say? By the way who are THEY? (Just asking)? Oh yes, your skin, too light, too dark, pot marked, rough, dry, oily, is that what they are saying? Let's not forget those lips, oh so, thin, no, too big? Left anything out? You take it from here. Today an inordinate amount of emphasis is placed on physical appearance. The validity of that statement is born out by the proliferation of cosmetic surgeries publicized in the media.

Are you, or were you teased in school or work, about what was considered to be less than perfect features. Young people, and adults alike do you have a particular shortcoming that is the bane of your existence? Perhaps you feel, at times, your life is not worth living, due to this "shortcoming." Well shame on you! "Why," you ask? I'll explain later.

Playing with the cards you're dealt

What do I mean, by the statement, play with the cards you're dealt? Card players can understand what I mean. One of my favorite games is a card game called Bid Whist. It's a poor man's version of Bridge. In the game, there are four players, only one wins the chance to change their hand. The other three players must play with the cards that they are dealt. To some the game is very serious. According to the expert players there are no bad hands, just bad players. You see with that "bad hand," according to the player that has it, must, if nothing else know when to play each card, to help their partner. Complaining about your "bad hand," is unacceptable, you simply must make the best of it. These rules are strictly adhered to by the serious players. I do like to play the game, however, I am by no means a serious player, so yes I do have a bad hand at times.

Well, for some, life is like that hand of cards, no matter what you get, you must learn to live with it, and make the best of it. And why not, most of the things that are heretofore mentioned can't be altered, and even those that can be, most wouldn't change it. Not being able or willing to alter their physical features, most people spend an inordinate amount of time focusing on these features, wasting time that could be spent in positive pursuits that could bring happiness to themselves or others.

Now, I could interject here, physical appearances should not be that important, but let's face it, to some they are, and for those ones that feel that they are, read on. And if you feel that someone you know could benefit from this hub, by all means stay with me here.

Consider this

While we are bemoaning our shortcomings, we should take a look around. Well first of all, think about this, if THEY are teasing you, maybe THEY are trying divert attention away from a shortcoming of their own, take a closer look at them, and don't judge, just as you would not want them to judge you. Let's get this out of the way now, as THEY say, "beauty is only skin deep." I know that doesn't make it any easier, so we won't spend a lot of time focusing on that aspect of physical appearances. I digress.

Suppose that you are complaining about your height, legs or feet. Consider this, what about the man that has no legs. Think he'd give just about anything to have legs and feet, regardless of what they looked like. What about your head, think about the person that has had an accident and is unable to think clearly, he probably doesn't care what size his head is now, if only he could use his the way he used it before. Maybe you're complaining about those hands, what are they used for, can you give a gentle back rub, feel the softness of the skin of a newborn baby? Wow! What about those girly/man hands now? You say your ears are your worst problem, can you hear beautiful music, or the soft whisper of your loved ones? Then to those with maladies, you too have reasons to be thankful, search yourself, what are they? (Another hub)! The features mentioned herein are, up till now, impossible, or nearly impossible to change. That being the case, why would you allow those things to dictate the extent of your happiness?

Change what

Instead of constantly lamenting the fault you find with your appearance, why not change. Not necessarily physically, (through cosmetic surgery), change your outlook. For instance even if you do have one or more of those shortcomings, you quite possibly have a feature that you can be proud to show. Do you have a head of hair that would make all the shampoo manufacturers want you to advertise for them. What about your hands and feet, maybe you have the most beautiful extremities any one's ever seen. Those muscular arms, those gams, (legs), need I say fashion model worthy? Oh that skin, smooth, milky white, olive, warm brown, beautifully dark as night? What about that small waistline, those beautiful, green, blue, brown eyes? Can you see where I'm going with this. In other words, look at yourself in the mirror and find something that is your pride and joy and play that up for all it's worth!

Now, after close scrutiny, you've not found that elusive beauty feature, ask someone. Yes that's what I said, ask someone, preferable a trusted friend, or a loved one, someone that has your best interest at heart. Be open, upfront, let them know that you are struggling with your "shortcoming," and need some encouragement. Hopefully you choose the right one. If you don't, I don't know what to tell you. Just kidding. With or without their help, just simply "learn to play with the cards that you are dealt.


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emohealer profile image

emohealer  says:
5 months ago

fastfreta,

I had to come searching for this hub, the notice I got in my email, the link didn't work, said it no longer existed...it was wrong thank goodness!

The title really says it all..so aptly named for appreciating what is, one of my favorite subjects you know and you wrote it incredibly well with a beautiful spin. As always, thank you and write on!

DynamicS profile image

DynamicS  says:
5 months ago

Wow! fastfreta, I love everything you said... You are right on point. We spend way too much time focusing on the physical and not enough time working on our internal (mind, thoughts, beliefs) I love your attitude and the way you express yourself so clear and precise. It was like listening to you speak.

Thanks for sharing and for inspiring us to look deep within and handle our business... Play with the cards you are dealt...I love it!!!!

fastfreta profile image

fastfreta  says:
5 months ago

Thank you emohealer, I hit the wrong button while I was writing the hub and instead of "done editing,"

I hit "publish now," when I wasn't ready to do so. On Saturday, something happened that sparked the idea for this hub and I just had to write it. I so appreciate when you read and critique my work, because I totally respect your opinion. Thanks again.

Thanks DynamicS, for stopping by. I still cannot believe that writers of your caliber and that of emohealer and more listen to what I have to say. I still have to pinch myself when I read your comments. Thanks very much.

ladydijay  says:
5 months ago

Keep up the good work. Very good reads.

fastfreta profile image

fastfreta  says:
5 months ago

Thanks ladydijay for stopping by.

Feline Prophet profile image

Feline Prophet  says:
5 months ago

You hit the nail on the head! We all have redeeming features, and I don't mean just physically. :)

fastfreta profile image

fastfreta  says:
5 months ago

Thank you Feline Prophet, for your validation of my hub. Please come back.

ashleyr24  says:
4 months ago

I like this one, especially because we all are self-conscious about something on our bodies. Some more than others, either way, we should be appreciative for what we have and embrace ourselves, shortcomings and all.

fastfreta profile image

fastfreta  says:
4 months ago

Thanks ashleyr, for stopping by and validating my hub. Come by again soon.

qlcoach profile image

qlcoach  says:
4 months ago

Dealing with body image is difficult. So is mental illness, addictions, and chronic illness,etc. Sometimes life deals us jokers and wild cards. Here is what I know: whatever happens, we can find positive and healing ways to overcome our suffering. Let us take that stand together and learn to walk in the Light. Thank you so much for commenting on some of HUBS. Namaste....Gary.

fastfreta profile image

fastfreta  says:
4 months ago

Thanks qlcoach for the encouraging comment. Come back again soon!

Bail Up ! profile image

Bail Up !  says:
4 months ago

thats right - Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, so put your best features forward and forget about the rest.

fastfreta profile image

fastfreta  says:
4 months ago

Thanks again Bail Up for your confirmation of my assessment of outer beauty.

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