So you've just brought your beautiful, new little baby home. She is as sweet as a button. So cute, so cuddley, even her cries make you smile. You've probably got lots of little baby socks in neat little pairs, even if it's the middle of summer. All sorts of pretty colors. "Those pwetty wittew feetsies need to stay warm. Yes they do. Ha yes they do."

Well, as the days pass, you're going to go through a lot of socks and lots of little loads of laundry. Not only are you obsessed with keeping everything that touches your sweet little one's skin, clean and fresh, but your little one has lots of tarry, sticky, dear lord, smelly, poops. "Don't you sweet thing. What a great job you're doing. Yes ma'm!"

Your little baby tries really hard to be big and strong. Those arms and legs try so hard to do... well... something.

This is especially true during diaper changing time.

It is during this time that you realize your baby has your spouse's sense of humor (not yours).

Yes, baby thinks it's a load of fun to stick the heel of her foot into the poopy diaper. It's a fun challenge, and one that babies do not take lightly.

That foot of hers is probably covered in a sock. If it's not, no problem, baby wipe what cute little foot clean. If it is, then you've got some laundry to take care of.

You are probably also noticing that your baby's diaper does not fit as well as the advertising claims say they do. You'll soon find yourself trying all sorts of brands as you weed out the liars, and the sort of liars.

A mother's tip (or note to self): Take off socks before changing diaper no matter how confident (aka out of your mind tired) you are that baby will be most cooperative.

In the mean time, you've got pee. Pee everywhere.

• on sheets
• on blankies
• on nearby toys
• on your clothes
• down baby's leg
• on baby's soaked sock

Ah yes, baby's soaked sock (with or without foot). You'll need to be washing that, won't you.

If you're lucky enough to have a washer and dryer at home, no problem. If you don't, well, you'll have to stick the baby in the laundry bucket and lug him to the laundry room or laundrymat with you. If she pees, well, it's laundry, so don't worry.

At least don't worry yet.

I know that you have taken great care to make sure you're using Dreft, or some other kind of special laundry detergent that won't make your baby's skin all itchy and bumpy. Just in case.

You're smiling, proudly at yourself, as well you should be, and wait for the washing machine cycle to finish. Now you're smiling as you pull the laundry with you baby's fresh clean socks out of the washing machine and you put them into the dryer carefully. You can't wait! But you have to.

• You wait. Forever. You forgot how long it takes a dryer to run its course.
• Your baby starts crying.
• You're getting hungry.
• You're tired.
• The beeper to the clothes dryer sounds.

Your eyes light up. You pull out the laundry fresh and warm. Reminds you of soft warm toasty bread. This makes you hungrier. You'd fold everything, but you decide you'll wait till you get home. You pull out a pair of socks to put on your baby while the laundry is still warm.

It's now time to worry.

I'm smiling, (with sympathy, of course), at poor you right now.

Why?

Well, either your baby's foot has grown, which is entirely possible, or, and more probable, your baby's sock has just shrunk in the dryer. They didn't tell you it would do that. And they didn't tell you what a difference that was going to make. You start to pull and tug and stretch those darn little sockies, to no avail.

You start to cry. Tired and hungry and now this...

Okay, so shrinkage doesn't happen for everyone or every time.  But it could.  Are you prepared?  Did you get a variety of brands and materials, just in case?

Let me just tell you right here and now, those baby socks don't last long so you'd better be well stocked up.

They'll get outgrown, FAST.

They will also shrink, FAST.

And yes, that sense of humor spoken of earlier concerning the foot in the exposed diaper poopies, well, those little feet do their best to rub and kick those all important socks off, FAST.

They WILL get lost.

• At the store,
• in the car,
• in the crib,
• onto the floor, where they get shuffled by YOUR feet to who knows where, only to be found when they don't matter anymore.

Sigh.

And don't ever think of your baby's socks as an investment. They do not make very good hand-me-downs; not shrunk and stained (just wait till you start the Gerber's baby food), and lost.

May I reiterate here that you simply cannot have enough socks for baby?

• Your baby's hands move just as eratically as their legs.
• They're nails are very sharp.
• You baby's face is soft and sweet.

See where I'm going with this yet?

Baby's tend to scratch up their face... a lot! And even if we keep their nails groomed all the time (yeah, good luck there), the itty bitty fingernails against baby's soft and sensitive skin, can, and will, make scratch marks which can get infected.

Many people buy hand mittens specially made for this purpose. I'm here to tell you that those hand mittens, gorgeous and cute as they may be, simply don't stay on. If you have a pair that actually works, let me know the brand, please! Otherwise, don't waste your money.

Instead, use your baby's socks.

• they fit perfectly
• add extra cush to their crazy arms
• are difficult for your baby to take off
• are a great way to recycle those baby socks that have lost their match

Just please make sure you take them off if your baby is sleeping or well occupied by you, so that your baby's hands can breathe. You will want to make sure that you wipe their hands with warm water on a washcloth after taking them off, especially if your baby's hands have gotten a bit sweaty.