The Nancy Drew Crew

Ah the mystery, the intrigue and fascination with things that don't matter,

The clues, the evidence and signs of blood splatter,

These are the things that unite us together in our search,

Galvanise us into action so that we get off our perch.

So now today, I bring unto you

The very talented and special Nancy Drew Crew.

We love suspense and a riveting thriller,

We get a little nervous when it turns to a chiller.

However, uncovering clues and a fake hubber,

Gives our minds exercise and helps rid us of excess blubber.

An unsolved crime,

Isn't worth the time,

We talk, we chat,

We might have the odd spat,

But in the end,

It's a fellow hubber we will defend.

So, what are the clues you might ask,

That set us off on this exciting and stimulating task.

This adventure where adrenalin flows,

from the tops of our heads right down to the ends of our toes.

It doesn't take long to put a name to a face,

And set up some software to start a trace.

Suicide and sarcasm are what got us started,

We sent emails to each other and our plan was charted.

Dissension and mayem are your plans of action,

To tear us apart and start a new faction.

Lies, double meanings and psychobabble speak,

Ah my friend, one day you'll squeak,

For the Nancy Drew Crew

Are so on to you.

We don't think you're a woman but think you're a porker,

And have thrown out the idea that you're somebody's stalker.

We know this is a game and you're just having fun,

And things will be normal when the challenge is done.

But...

The intrigue and the mystery, your identity we will discover,

Your madness and reasons we will uncover,

Because the Nancy Drew Crew

Are so on to you.

You can schmooze to the men

And treat women like they are ten,

But when you leave comments that freak some of us out,

We seriously need to find out what it's all about.

Our suspicions are up and paranoia abounds,

Oh my goodness, how weird this all sounds.

That someone can find time to set up a scam,

And one that is quite clever as well, damn!

Just to lead some hubbers astray,

And stress them out and stuff up their day.

For us this isn't fun but something sick,

Demented, sadistic, just take your pick.

But...

Don't forget whatever your move, wherever you go,

It will always be one step too slow,

Because the Nancy Drew Crew

Is so on to you.