Cougar...Me? Dating & The Older Woman
Cougar...Me?
As a single woman who is well over 40 now, I often find myself in the not so unique position of being the object of the attention of much younger men. As the mother of a 24 year old, it's starting to creep me out a little that some of the men who are hitting on me are not far from my son's age. What am I saying, some of them are my son's age! I want to ask them if their mother knows their son is out there trying to date someone they may have gone to high school with....all kinds of creepy in my book. Or if their mother know that they're still up on a school night! I have to wonder what the interest factor is for a man in his 20's to be pursuing a women over 40...I'm guessing it's (a) money) or (b) a mother complex.
Cougars Sometimes Are Prone To Growl
Hey, I know all about the cougar thing, but c'mon, do I really want to have to train a man that young? An older man knows when I'm pissed off, the key reaction should be: DO NOT TALK TO ME. ...DO NOT TOUCH ME. ..HECK, DON'T EVEN LOOK AT ME. But no, these young guys want to "discuss it" and talk about "my feelings." Give me good old fashioned indifference any day. Leave me alone! I just need a minute to reconsider wanting to kill you and then I'll be all brand new again! I don't want to freaking TALK about it! No thanks, I'm good.
Bump-a-bump-a-bump-bumpa-bump
And then there's the thing with the music. If we're going someplace in the car, I want to listen to my girls Ann and Nancy (and if you don't know who they are by their first names, you aren't old enough to date me!) and he wants to listen to Lil' Wayne or Lil' Boosie Or Lil' somebody like that, I don't know, most of those guys don't have real names anyway. And must we have the car windows rolled down with this stuff blasting out in the middle of January?! Not that I'm so old I want to listen to elevator music or Frank Sinatra all the time, but seriously, how many times do I have to listen to "My Girlfriend's A Stripper." C'mon, really?
The Time Warp Issue
Sure you're a hottie. I mean just look at you all rocked up with the six pack abs and smooth (spray) tanned skin with nary a wrinkle under those big gorgeous eyes., But if I see it, don't you think I know that the rest of the female population sees it, too? I mean seriously, how can I compete? Even the 30 year old babes are Botoxed within an inch of their still young lives and with the advent of butt implants and calf implants along with all those other implants, do you think I don't know my body suffers in comparison? Do you really want to go to the beach with me and have to turn down young chicks who ask if your mom will be ok alone while you go play sand volleyball with the Swedish female volleyball team that just happens to be in the area? Please!
Good Looks Don't Last Forever...
You know I hate turning you down and you know, it might be fun for a day or a week, maybe even a couple of years,. But one day you're gonna wake up beside me and turn over and be staring at OLD. If that doesn't freak you out, I don't know what will.
Except maybe changing my Depends in about 20 years...I'm just sayin'...........