The Terrible Secret Of Kim Kardashian's Ass

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By Hope Alexander


Before...

After...


A great deal of attention has been paid to Kim Kardashian's ass over the past few months. For too long it languished in ignominy, then, like a butterfly emerging from its chrysalis, Kim's ass burst forth in all its newfound glory when her sex tape was released. Sure, you could see that as a sordid attempt at grabbing fame, or you could view it as a beautiful act of nature. I chose the latter, because, well, I'm a half full kind of gal.

It would seem however, according to the photographic evidence that you can see displayed to the right, that Kim's ass, and much of the rest of her rather luscious body is not merely the work of the Creator, but of a surgeon or two along the way. This is a rather grainy photograph to be sure, and even in this old picture one can tell that Kim is possessed of what we would still have to consider a great derrière, but there seem to have been many changes in Kim from the time this picture was taken to the present day.

Breasts - Definitely smaller. Nowadays Kim's breasts threaten to smother small nations. Back in the day they were well proportioned, but of relatively average size. They also didn't snuggle up with one another as they do now. Once upon a time , Kim's breasts were independent beings, free to go where they wished. Nowadays they're more like conjoined twins.

Nose - I don't know about you guys, but that nose certainly doesn't look like the one we see Kim sporting these days. It seems a great deal more generous than the almost Aryan feature that now adorns her face. I suspect that there may have been some whittling going on in order to achieve that effect.

Eyes - Maybe she's just squinting in this beach photo, but Kim's eyes seem a great deal larger. Is this an effect even possible in plastic surgery? I know they do it with old people who have become saggy in all the wrong places, but did Kim Kardashian have an eye lift even before the age of 30?

Ass - The ass is a bit of a mystery, but I would wager that her ass is a fair bit smaller in this picture than in more recent ones. Did Kim just eat too many cheeseburgers? Or does she sit on cushions of silicone? God that must feel weird. Imagine having foreign object perpetually in your ass.

Hm, now I think of it, Kim would probably have that experience regardless of whether she had plastic surgery or not.

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Ariana  says:
5 months ago

WOW !! Kim Kardashian is a very beautiful woman ... Yea she made a sex tape ... so what? She was with the guy & dey wanted to try something new ... People act as if they have never done something " Naughty " ... OBVIOUSLY this beach picture is old .. She looks like shes 16 - 18 yrs old in that photo & you can also tell by what she is wearing this was the 90`s .. she became a woman... You cant even see her ass. Im the exact size as her and have a HUGE NICE ASS not to sound cocky but it is genetic .. my mother ... my grandmother & so on. Look at her sister .. big ass also .. maybe not as well proportioned as Kims but it is. Its so annoying how people Judge these ppl in the spot light. Get over it. Even if she enhanced her body. Does this effect you? No?

Hope Alexander profile image

Hope Alexander  says:
5 months ago

Well perhaps ostensibly what Kim does with her ass does not affect me, but if we take into account the Chaos theory, then it is quite possible that Kim's ass may be affecting more than we imagine.

It is, after all, a rather large ass. If a butterfly's wings flapping in South America could possibly cause storms in Alaska, imagine what something the size of Kim Kardashian's ample ass swishing about could do? ;)

Wendy  says:
3 months ago

Big deal Kim is fat and wears a girdle which makes her butt look like a big huge freaky butt. I would cry is I got fat like Kim.

nicole  says:
3 months ago

Kim Kardashian is very pretty but i personally love her two sister's because they're more wild like me especially referring to Khloe!!!

valerie  says:
2 months ago

you are very beautiful

Kansas  says:
5 weeks ago

I don't much care what the woman's ass looks like, the grey matter or lack of is what really puts me off. For that matter, what REALLY bothers me is the fact that a large chunk of the country takes the time to recognize someone who has no talent, does nothing (other than be rich and give hummers) and really acts like a first class bitch in everything she does. Fat ass? nah...it's OK...it's the brain that needs the workout

empty  says:
3 weeks ago

Her ass is heavenly. I like women that look like women not boys in drag.

Maylinda Arons profile image

Maylinda Arons  says:
3 weeks ago

I, personally, don't give a crap about this woman's ass, but, people above me! Recognise the true beauty of this article! It's celebrity caboose! Who doesn't like celebrity-bodypart-gossip? And, more importantly, this is one of the funnier things I've read in, say, a decade. Hope, write a book. Please. I think I'd die of happiness.

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