The Man Should Pay On A First Date!
87
So, who should pay for the first date? Short answer? The man.
(Excuse me while I give the wannabe feminists a moment to tantrum….)
All done, ladies? Good. As I was saying, the man pays for a first date. Yes, the woman might throw a big fit about equality, blah, blah, blah. She might even tell you how much money she makes, to let your know she can feed herself on her own dime. These are all signs of insecurity and it will only get worse as you get to know her. The average woman has plenty of psycho-potential – why add this kind of unnecessary drama to the mix? There are plenty of women secure in their femininity who would love to be taken out to dinner. Aim for one of them, next time. If you want a real woman (one who is able to distinguish between being a woman and being an object) I'd advise you to err on the side of caution and at least try to pay for the first date.
Here are five reasons why:
It shows you can lead.
Liberal though I am in a number of areas, I’m old-fashioned when it comes to this kind of thing. A man should be able to lead. (Note: This does not mean control!) If you can’t take the initiative in something small - like paying for meal - that tells me you’ll probably lack leadership in other areas as well. I can lead myself just fine, but I don’t want to have to lead you, too. Be a man.
She might not see you again, if you don’t
I certainly wouldn’t. I fully expect a man to pay for the first date. I don’t care if that sounds sexist or just plain wrong. This is about chivarly; it's not really about money. Nevertheless, if you can't be arsed to pay for something as cheap as a meal, that's pretty sad, really. Especially when you consider how often women buy or do things for men. I buy loads of stuff for the men in my life, and I don't sit there and count pennies over it. If you don’t think her worthy of a happy meal, you might not think her worthy of anything else, either. The subliminals on this can be pretty strong.
It shows you have standards.
If you believe the man should pay on the first date, this lets a woman know you have values of some kind. It tells her that you hold yourself accountable for something. It tells her you follow your own moral compass and aren’t easily influenced by trends. In a world full of wishy-washy metrosexuals, this holds quite a bit of water, especially if the woman in question has a dominant personality.
It shows you have an instinct to provide.
Notice I didn’t say it shows you can provide. Having and spending the dosh on dinner aren’t the issues here. A woman wants to know you want to pay for dinner - that you get some kind of satisfaction out of caring for her on some level. Cheesy as it sounds, the presence of this feeling is crucial to the longevity of any relationship she’s in. If you make her feel like a burden on the first date, her subconscious will suggest she find someone who doesn’t.
It shows you’re not a tightwad.
This doesn’t mean she’s a gold digger. But, come on, if you get bent over buying a woman dinner on your very first date, that doesn’t bode well for the rest of your relationship. If she thinks you’re the type to complain about every little penny, she’s not going to want to see you again. Who needs that kind of headache? Most women give freely to their man. We spend loads of time shopping for your birthday and holiday gifts -- it shouldn't be about the money. It should be about wanting to be chivalrous!
Obviously, some women will disagree with the idea of men paying for a first date. I suppose you could let her pay – if she really insists. Be aware, however, that some women will use that as a test. One you'll fail, if she ends up paying for herself. I’d give you pointers on how to spot that kind of girl, but you’re better off not knowing. Let them protest too much. Less hassle for you, and more money in your pocket. The rest of us, however, would appreciate being treated with some modicum of chivalry.
PrintShare it! — Rate it: up down flag this hub
Comments
If I wanted to suck a man dry, trust me, I would be far more creative.
You're wrong, it's about respecting her from the start. If a man doesn't, I don't have time for him.
I'm a firm believer in offering to pay on a first date. However, I am also a firm believer in that the man should not allow me. I actually used to fight over the bill to be able to pay for myself.
Then a male friend of mine told me that if a guy doesn't pay on the first date, he shouldn't get a 2nd date. I've actually gotten more repeat dates since I started letting the men pay.
If it's an official date, then yes the man should pay. If it's jsut a bit of coffee while you figure out if you want to date, then each should pay for their own. If the man doesn't want to provide then that speaks of lack of character and who wants a man without character.
Shayze - Excellent!
Sara - Yes, I agree!
As a man I think I would pay for the first date even though the girl may want to pay. To me this would be more like a curlture. Thanks
well,
if I ask a lady out, then I will pay, but I will also not take her to diner, and make sure it doesn't cost more that 20-30 dollars. On a first date you have no way of really knowing if the woman you're out with is worth your time let alone your hard earned money. I simply dump my half onto the check when it comes and wait for her to pull her wallet.
It can even ruin things with women I MAY like when they don't even 'offer' to pay because it makes them out to be selfish. It also tells me that she will expect this treatment the entire time we date (no that there will eb a next time). I can expect to include her as an expense much as I do gas, food, and electric.
If a woman doesn't want to see me again because I didn't bestow value on her with MY money, then she didn't value herself to begin with. Any woman that hangs with me will not need ME to give her worth.
A gentleman pays for a first date - that's just respect. It doesn't have to be a 5 star restaurant. And it doesn't mean he needs to buy gifts or pay for everything else. But a first date? What kind of man would let a woman pay on a first date, ffs?
"What kind of man would let a woman pay on a first date, ffs?"
One who wants to be treated as a human being, not as a meal ticket. If each person pays for his or her share, then each person knows that the other is going out with him/her for his/her company, not because there's a free meal/movie coming.
Oh dear.. are you whining?
Well... I'm just a country boy and maybe the protocols are a bit different amongst you metropolitan types, but my granddaddy would dig himself out of his grave and stick his bony toes in the crack of my ass if i even considered letting a lady pay!
If a guy did not pay for my first date, there would be no way he would get a second date. I make a lot of money so it isn't that I am looking for a "sugar dady". If a guy can't pay for a single meal when he in the courting/impressing period, it shows me that he isn't trying hard to keep me in his life.
OneShot - Good for you! :)
Ronica - Exactly!
Ronica, everything you say can be turned around 180 degrees. If a gal can't pay even for HER OWN meal, then you're not even trying HALF as hard as the guy you're calling cheap.
We're not calling him cheap - that's what you don't understand. We're calling him less than a gentleman.
Well, the priority is whether the gal wants dates or be a feminist. Why not be a secret feminist? Pamper the man's wishes, but still be in control? There's no lack of respect when a guy offers to pay, it shows he values her, actually.
In other words, I agree with you, Isabella.
180 degrees: one could just as easily say that you're "less than a lady" if you don't pay...that's why I'M in favor of both parties paying equally.
Kenny - Good idea! :)
Brian - I'm not a lady. I just happen to prefer gentlemen. if you dont want to pay, don't pay. Doesn't matter to me, as we aren't dating.
Brian, if both parties pay, there's no romance, it's a biz deal! Even when friends go out together, it's better if only one pays. The others can have their turn next time.
Yes, very well said, Kenny!
...so if two friends eat out on a platonic get-together, or, for that matter, two gays and lesbians go out on a date, who does what? See, according to your philosophy, Kenny, two lesbians could NEVER go out on a date, because neither one would be able to pay, whereas two gay guys would be fighting tooth-and-nail over the check. Our gay and lesbian friends show us just how silly these gender norms are.
Brian, all wrong! Tangents will get you nowhere. I like it if only one pays, whether gay or lesbian or hetero. And this article is only about heteros, and it recommends the guy pays.
I am saying going dutch is not romantic or beautiful, and that goes for all dates and friends.
Brian you make excellent points. I agree with everything you said. This article is circulating around my office this evening, and getting many laughs.
I'd go out with you, Brian!
Lots of little boys in the office, eh Mary?
I treat my dates as I treat friends when we go out as a group to a restaurant or bar. I am willing to pay for all of my friends when we go out. I never go out without enough money to cover the whole bill for the meal or the rounds of drinks. So I do pay for the date all the time even the second and third but...If I went on a date and the gal told me straight up that I was expected to pay for her I find that very rude and I wouldn't even think about paying for her (that is if I stuck around for the date). I understand that even talking about not paying can be a sin to some, but I find that if person is going to be rude about it this person is not even close to being my friend. Therefore I won't even treat her as friend and cover the meal.
Nicholas, nobody is saying anything about telling a man he has to pay. That wouldnt be much of a test, if he already knew what was expected. And it is a test. There are tons of tests both men and women put each other through on a first date. If a man doesnt want to pay, he doesnt have the character I expect in a man. Its really that simple. Some women dont care, and some stupidly insist on wearing the pants. Good for them. Doesnt work for me.
Isabella:
I think there are points being missed by some of the folk who have commented here. A man picking up the tab on the first date is every bit as gentlemanly and old-fashioned standard as a man opening a door for a lady (something that makes me swoon when my man does it,) standing when a lady comes in the room, and waiting to be seated for a meal until the ladies have been seated.
Times change, however, and we're going to start seeing more of a "Well if I have to pay on the first date, she should too!" kind of attitude. Likewise, women reaching for some skewed "equality" are going to be outraged by a view into your article.
It's too bad that so many people have forgotten a little thing like the natural order. Men have been our hunter gatherers for thousands of years, only in the last hundred years or so have women begun to take offense to being cared for.
Yes, gamergirl. It's about difference in portfolios, not about inequality. Or lack of respect.
A man on the bus today was next to seat that emptied (it was a very full bus). Instead of sitting down, he offered me the seat. Part of me wanted to refuse because there is no reason for him to offer the seat to a woman. I could stand just as much as he could--we are both young, probably the same age, and commuting home after a day of work. But, I took the seat. I thanked him and appreciated it. I couldn't help but think how considerate that was of him to do, and how he must treat his girlfriend/wife nicely. There is nothing wrong with a man paying on the first date.
Isa,
I applaud you! American women usually miss the point completely. Men and women ARE different, and it is men's responsibility to take care of women. Great hub!
Not just American women, women all over the world seem to think that a man shouldn't step up and be the provider. I'm not saying 100% of the time, a woman in this modern era can do her part also, but there is absolutely nothing wrong with a man taking care of the first move, so to speak.
Gamergirl - You're so right, very well said! :)
Stacie - Yes, it's about how a man *wants* to treat you, not how he *should*.
Misha - I agree with you! Wow! Amazing! ;)
Marisa - You are not more straightforward than myself, I promise. I ALWAYS offer to pay, and I will do so if it's allowed. I'm happy to discover a man's lack of interest on a first date, it saves me wasting my time with someone who doesn't want me badly enough.
Actually Russian women (and I believe women from other "underdevelopped" countries) still expect men to take care of them. Which makes me doubting if the progress (as it is understood by western civilization) is that good thing....
Sometimes Eastern traditions work; sometimes Western progress works. Relationships are a dance. Traditional Man cares by taking care of the woman outside, while Traditional Woman cares for the man indoors. Sometimes tradition stinks, when men bully women, to put it lightly. When love and romance are priorities, most things work: tradition or not following it become non sequiturs. Lots packed in your comment, Misha!
In my case, I WISH a man would have paid once in a while.
Yeah Kenny, I'm pretty much on the same page with you. What actually amazes me - how people with obviously very different background come the very similar conclusions as life progresses...
Yes, Misha, I think we are all the same inside - our loves, our fears, our dreams... Society only paints a superficial layer of difference.
This 'as life progresses' concept is very insightful. I like to believe that we all grow older and wiser, more loving, more understanding.
"I am saying going dutch is not romantic or beautiful, and that goes for all dates and friends."
Yeah, cuz people treating each other as equals is just so not hot, right?
"Brian you make excellent points...I'd go out with you."
Thanks, Mary. Likewise.
"Lots of little boys in the office, eh Mary?"
Is that your main approach? Calling anyone who disagrees with you a little boy or girl? Really, now.
"A man picking up the tab on the first date is every bit as gentlemanly and old-fashioned standard as a man opening a door for a lady (something that makes me swoon when my man does it,) standing when a lady comes in the room, and waiting to be seated for a meal until the ladies have been seated."
As long as the women are willing to do all of these things, also, I have no problem with it.
"A man on the bus today was next to seat that emptied (it was a very full bus). Instead of sitting down, he offered me the seat."
Perhaps he was just being a person being courteous to another person, rather than a MAN offering a seat to a WOMAN.
Brian, darling, do you really think men don't offer to buy me dinner? This article is my opinion, if you don't like it, don't read it. And you're starting to froth, sweetie, drop down to your local and have a drink. Maybe you can find a feminist to pick up your tab, since that's seems to be how you roll.
Brian, welcome to Hubpages, and thanks for giving Isabella the free press! :)
Equality does not mean we can't show love for our friends and dates, Brian. If I offer to carry someone's bag, I don't intend disrespect. And when someone does it to you, it does not mean he is superor, too. Caring and sharing are not business deals; as in 'you do your part and I'll do mine.'
First you ask if I'm whining; now you say I'm "frothing"? How you flatter yourself. Why did you get into HubPages if you're so terrified of having your views challenged?
Brian, I'm not the one posting anonymously.
I think Isabella enjoys having her views challenged, more than just a 'Good hub' comment.
I'm sure you are enjoying this exchange, too!
Oh, I don't mind, as long as they challenges do more than whinge about someone else's opinion!!
I don't think anything can be as cut and dry as "Yes, men should pay for the first date." These days, the traditional linear courtship ritual of a man proposing a date, a woman accepting, etc. is most certainly not always the case. If a woman is interested and is the asker, then it would be more comfortable for her to assume they're going dutch on the check. I'm not a raging feminist, but as a decent human being, I feel it would be rude to invite someone out and then expect them to foot the entire bill. If they offered, I would be flattered and accept; but if they didn't, I wouldn't have expected them to pay for the both of us in the first place, and certainly wouldn't be peeved.
Um, no one said anything about asking a man out. I don't waste my time with men who aren't confident enough to ask me out themselves. Anything less is boring.
"Equality does not mean we can't show love for our friends and dates, Brian. If I offer to carry someone's bag, I don't intend disrespect. And when someone does it to you, it does not mean he is superor, too."
That wasn't my argument, Kenny. My argument is that if we only ask MEN to carry WOMEN'S bags, and hold doors for them, and pull out their chairs, and pay for their dinner, without asking women to reciprocate their kindness, then we are treating the men as inferior, not superior. The beauty of equality is that it benefits everybody.
"Um, no one said anything about asking a man out. I don't waste my time with men who aren't confident enough to ask me out themselves. Anything less is boring."
So...if you don't believe in asking a man out, does that mean you're boring, and that you lack confidence?
"Brian, I'm not the one posting anonymously."
Take a look at that sentence and see if you can find the self-contradiction.
Yes, I'm boring and I lack confidence. And I'm sorry, Brian, I fail to see the magic in your last sentence. You're just some guy typing "brian" in every few days and leaving drivel all over my nice little hub. In fact, you're starting to bore me. Your future replies had better be worth reading, or you'll find them deleted.
I wasn't calling you boring and lacking in confidence, Isabella. But it seems you do call men who'd like to be asked out those very things. I was merely turning it around. And I'll be happy to explain that self-contradiction, though I'm sure you do understand it already: if I'm coming on here with my first name, then I'm not posting anonymously. It seems you compliment the posters who fawn over what you say, and give dismissive, insulting answers to those with an alternative point of view. Whatevah.
Wrong. You could be anyone. No photo, no link to anything about you, who you are, or anything else. You are completely anonymous.
Great discussion! I agree with you Isabella! It is the nature of a man to treat the lady on the first date. It has to be special date also.
EXACTLY!!! A woman would like to have gentleman for a date not a man who just ignores it until she finally gives in. So men in the future pay !!! This happened to me and the waiter came over with the check and my stupid date started talkin all of a sudden and kinda gave me motions to pay it , WHAT A JERK.
Carley, you're not more ballsy, independent, brassy or self-sufficent than myself. And you clearly can't read, or you'd know I said you can pay for anything you want to pay for. This is about the FIRST DATE. If you don't want to see a man pay on a first date, you're in the market for boys. Best of luck with that - real women won't mind a bit if you keep one of them for yourself.
Isabella: I disagree. I think that whichever person does the "asking out" should pay.
Ronald - Thanks! :)
Natalie - Right on, sister!
James - I would lose all respect for a man who let me pay for a first date. I'm actually a bit stunned you said that... We'll have to disagree, I guess!
Kenny, I'm not sure what your last sentence means? Are you talking about me, or are you talking to me?? Anyway, I would never ask a man out on a date. Ever. It's just not something I could be bothered with doing, as I think men get far too big a head when that happens and it screws everything up anyway.
But I would offer to pay for myself on a first date, and would do so if he didnt protest - and Id never go on a second date with him. Just wouldn't happen.
And I think you are right Isa :) And I may date a girl like Carley, even go sleep with her a couple of times, but there is no way such a girl will become my wife... Cause I don't need unisex, I need a *woman*...
Isabella! I agree with you 100%. And that is not because I'm old fashioned. If a man asks a woman out doesn't he want to come accross as a Gentleman? And the woman doesn't she want to feel like a lady? Now just go a little further and consider this date is *the* one. Will you, man want to be remembered as a gentleman from the first date on or just the tight wad who just happened to find the right lady while hunting for fresh mxxx?
Lol! Misha - How on earth am I unisex? I am all woman sweetheart, don't get it twisted.
Isabella..on the market for boys? Are you crazy? I have an intelligent, attractive..and financially independant man who I didn't get by holding stupid traditional beliefs that he should conform to the traditional opinions that girls such as yourself holds.
I pity any man that should have to date such a woman to be honest..a woman that lives life through stereotyping. You need to loosen up and go with the flow honey, or you'll be a lonely old spinster!
Good day now.
Oh, and Mish..from the look and sound of you sweetie..I wouldn't date, sleep with, or even look at you twice my friend. You and Isabella, isabel, whatever..should get together. Your traditional and perhaps closed minded boring views would suit eachother perfectly.
Carley, real men have real values. Someday you'll get it. Odd, however that you're even reading an article on first dates, if you're happily involved.
Zsuzsy - She's one of the "feminists" I mentioned earlier. They don't realize they protest a bit too loudly.. ;)
Isabella! Being a feminist has nothing to do with being rude...I've taken care of myself and my children for thirty some years. I don't need a man to open the door for me or to pay my bill. I can do all that, as I can fix my own car, my plumbing etc. But when I'm asked out on a date its on his dime...
Zsuszy - I know... ;) I used quotations because these women *think* they are feminists, but aren't.
Pig eater - Well, I can't speak for all women on this, and I don't think my way is the only way, but personally I would *want* to do the cooking, cleaning and etc. Thats a caretaking instinct most women have. That doesnt mean he can take unfair advantage, however.
Besides that, most men suck at cleaning and I'd rather do it myself than have to re-clean what he cleaned. Sex is another matter entirely. If he's worth a damn, he might get sex on the first date. That's irrelevant to this topic - what you're describing is assumed prostitution, and that's not acceptable in anyone's book, unless they're a pimp.
I do not think I'm a feminist. I don't believe in labelling, stereotyping ect ect.
-Zsuzsy Bee - I'm a true lady, I do not need reassurance of that.
Carley - Are you trying to convince us, or yourself?
Zsuzsy - This article is almost 6 months old ;) Its a timeless topic, there will always be women who haven't realized why this is significant, and there will always be men like Pig whining about "having" to pay - especially when they arent guaranteed sex.
I'm not trying to resolve anything - there is only one option as far as I'm concerned. ;)
Isabella! I agree with you. I just find it so sad that we women have fought for a what little equality we have got and still need to prove we're worth a stupid first date meal...but whats even worse is that some women don't understand what they are doing...Well I guess I stuck my nose in deep enough
regards Zsuzsy
By-the-way! Great HUB...I didn't even realize it was six month old...I'm not sure how I came across it.
explosive HUB
Carley,
Please read carefully, I was not going to date you, let alone all the rest - stop day dreaming :)
I was talking about a girl *like* you, i.e. abstract girl with mentality like yours - if you know what I'm talking about...
Hi Isabella, I should have read this article before I decided to start dating. I went out with this girl I liked and made the horrible mistake of spliting the check (although it was her initiative). The thing is, I'm on a tight budget right now, but I guess that's no excuse. Anyway she did not return my calls so I guess I blew my chances. Lesson learned. Guys, don't make that mistake.
Maybe a next article could deal on strategies to get girls to give you a second chance... because I would love to have one.
Yes, that's right. And I have no qualms about it, whatsoever. And as for it limiting the men available -- the men are already limited far beyond what money allows for.
I'll have to disagree with you here. I suppose part of the reason for this is that I'm of the younger generation, and I haven't grown up with the same ideas of gender roles as I think most of the people frequenting this article have.
In any case, the point I want to make is that I don't think you offer to pay because you're a man-- You offer to pay because that's the nice thing to do. This includes women, too. It would be all too easy for me to form a negative opinion of somebody who just takes for granted that the other will pay.
I realize that I'm sort of resurrecting a dead hub.. But I want to introduce a new perspective: Maybe the first date shouldn't be such a big deal after all. I agree with Marcellus' post of 10 months ago-- more specifically, the point he made that you don't yet know this person and whether you could fall in love with them at all. Maybe the first date doesn't have to decide everything, it's such an all-or-nothing approach. Rather, I think it would be better to go out casually at first, with no expectations past conversation and good company: just getting to know each other better. If the person's truly dating material, you'll know; if not, then he or she might still make a good friend.
I think the biggest problem I have with these standards of dating is that they're far too rigid. Good people with good intentions might end up prematurely rejected simply because he or she thought it reasonable to split the bill (it certainly seems reasonable to me.. isn't it fairest that way?), and the worst part is that you might never know what you've missed. So why are you in such a hurry to drop them?
Also, these rules make dating seem so impersonal: Simply an evaluation of one of many applicants, taking into account the amount of happiness you might gain from an arrangement, and not the actual person underneath.
Your comment doesn't annoy me as much as the length of it; it's not good etiquette to leave a novel in someone's comment section. I will leave it up this time, only to use as reference for saying this:
Perhaps you're also too young to know the difference between a man and the average male. A man pays because he does want to, because he holds himself to a standard that others do not. Boys and prats whinge about things like this, and women who do not understand men allow this to happen. The first date can be coffee -- it doesn't matter. It's not about cost, it's about deed.
End of discussion.
Ah, sorry about that. I don't suppose I have to say it for you to know that I'm new to hubpages. And I hope that the difference between boys and men, as you define it, isn't something that must be inevitably grown into.
To each their own, is all I can say.
Oh, but it isn't. You're either a man, or you're not. If you think boys are preferrable, that's perfectly wonderful; more men for the rest of us.
Interesting that you automatically assumed that I'm a girl.
Either way, I think a world in greyscale is at least more vibrant than a world of only black and white. My point is-- You deal in absolutes, you miss out. And of all things, I think love should be too deep to be decided in one evening.
I didn't assume anything at all, because your sex is insignificant. Interesting you assume being a man means you would have to be straight -- this could apply in either case. Regardless, I was speaking in general, not to "you" specifically; and this is the end of this conversation.
I have read your article and I would say that for the most part I do agree. However, in this day and age it has come down to whom asked whom first. Bad as it may be the days of gentlemen have passed. There are quite a few left but for the most part it is gone. In my opinion it happened with this whole being equal with one another business. So I do agree with you but I do understand how others may feel.
What is the point of dating and being a penny pinching, cheap, tightwad fighting over the bill anyway??? How do you even explain seperate checks LOOOL I would throw another $100 at his face and tell him to take etiquette classes.
It has nothing to do with feminism, equality, independence, etc. It's simply a matter of going back to the basics of a man acting like a man!
Ladies, get over it and just enjoy being treated like a lady. And, guys... step up to the plate!
Ok, let's do th math here. A man wants to meet a woman for a relationship, right? But let's say he has to "date" 50 women. That's 50 FIRST dates. And he should pay for all of them? Our society is set up to make every man in this country broke! All you women who think you DESERVE to have a man buy you dinner, drinks, etc, what world are l you living in? Don't you work? It has nothing to do with being a gentleman. It's economics. All you women just sit back and wait for your prince to ride in. Good luck with that. Me, I'll be happy with a woman who is my equal...who will stand beside me and not EXPECT things to be a certian way. Lose your expectations, ladies, and you might be surprised.
It does not matter who does the asking, there is nothing wrong with a man offering to pay for the first date. It is a statement of action. A statement of intent.If a woman chooses to go dutch and put half the bill down, that's fine too.
At least she had the choice!
In fact from my conversations over the years it would seem that these little details go a long way indicating what sort of relationship or lack of it will occur...right at the outset from the first few dates.Sure it might pan out then go sour but that's surely better than being with idiots all the time.
A man should always pay on the first date. I do. A man has to be chivalrous.
I went on many dates and I would usually be the one who'd cover the check whenever it came. I always thought it was the norm for us to pay for the first date but realized after many dates that this preconceived expectation isn't fair for men. I'm not frugal or thrifty and make a decent income from a business I own. Whenever I asked to split the check, I usually get mixed reactions from women. The ones who showed no hesitation in splitting the check had no signs of frustration whatsoever. They didn't hold a grudge that I even asked and thought it was fair since we're just getting acquainted. The ones who gave excuses (i.e. she left her cash, purse, or atm card in my car) or the ones showed facial expressions of suprise or disgust were the ones that almost never asked for a second date. Actually the ones who didn't mind splitting were the ones I actually had more subsequent dates after I had set the tone "I want to be fair". Afterwards, it seemed less awkward the next time the bill hit the table when we both started to take turns saying, "I got this, you get the next one :)"
akshay says:
2 years ago
U know I completely disagree with u. If this is your ultimate aim to suck a man dry then u should reconsider this strategy.
Dating is more like a process of knowing someone better. Moreover, I believe the moment a woman pays or even offers to pay on a date, the man really starts respecting her. Its more about self-respect nothing else. If anyone lacks that, is she worth dating?
Akshay