beyond sadness
65who's got their claws on you my friend?
The hardest to deal with are the tears that won't fall. They stay gripping the heart, squeezing it tightly and never letting go. So after you have shed oceans of tears for mountains of reasons the soul is still weary like an old man stripped of all glory. The inside is empty and hollow. Like a gaze that penetrates but does not comprehend. I wonder if anyone else recognizes this texture of sadness when it shrouds their lives. This is worse than losing a loved one or getting your heart broken because at least there is the visceral pain that accompanies these kinds of sadness. Pain is something that everyone can relate to because its almost alive, almost tangible. This barren grief though cannot be described and cannot be named. Empty and hollow, it does not inspire suicide, no, that would have been too easy. This sadness drags you by the hair kicking and screaming to imprison you to a state of nothingness. It does not inspire anger, just resignation and it draws a bleak shade on everything that used to be happy and bright and it stays. Keeping watch, waiting to pounce again and again without warning.
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Comments
this idea came to mind after reading 100 years of solitude by gabriel garcia marquez, its hauntingly beautiful but really really sad
this is heavy stuff but so true! we've been there once, twice, God knows how many times. thanks for sharing :D
Yep... the dark cloud still hovers over me...four years now... don't know how to blow it away. :)
As they say when you've reached the bottom, there's no other way but up my friend.
And I must agree - though sometimes, staying at the bottom can take awhile, even a looong looong while! LOL
Yep and that's alright too especially if you are aware that you're there for the long haul, which means you're allowing it to happen and can drag yourself out anytime you wish. Saw you hit the 100 mark here on Hubpages Cris! Wow that's no small feat my friend!
Thanks! I even posted in Forums that I reached the pole position in both the Hot and Best Hubs! LOL I can't help it... might as well have fun while it lasts... :D













Denny Lyon says:
12 months ago
This is a very accurate description of what a bi-polar depressed person experiences. I have a friend who is an incredible poet and the unexplained sadness has gripped her like this for decades - and she's on medication all the time yet still experiences it. It's a real struggle for her. Thanks for giving voice to what she often writes about.