Why do guys think that all girls have a bit of lesbian in them?
78Us girls we are so magical, soft skin, red lips, so kissable, hard to resist, so touchable, too good to deny it! - Katy Perry, "I Kissed a Girl"
Why do guys think that all girls have a bit of lesbian in them?
I think the easy answer is that most of us do!
Personally, I believe that sexual attraction is fluid and often circumstantial, and that most people - heterosexual or homosexual - are a little bit bisexual, even if their actual partners have only been of one sex or the other. I've often joked that I'm straight, but would do Angelina Jolie if she asked me (ha!) and know a lot of other outwardly straight girls who have similar "girlcrushes."
After all, it's no secret that most straight girls find women to be physically more beautiful than men, even if we're not actually sexually attracted to other women. This seems to give some poor guys a complex, if the quantity of penile enhancement spam that turns up in my email is any basis to judge. Sorry guys, but you're just kind of silly-looking down there and no amount of drugs is gonna fix that!
Lucky for you, most of us love you anyway! :)
Still, you can't help but contemplate sometimes how much easier life would be if only we could be lesbians. Girls just get each other in ways guys rarely do, and it's frustrating for both partners. Even the most happily married couples have days when they really just want to murder each other. Now, I'm sure the same is completely true for lesbian (and gay!) couples, but the grass is always greener, as they say.
Unfortunately for the 99.9% of straight men with a lesbian fetish, most straight girls take an attitude to the matter best articulated by Michael Novotny, a fictional gay man from the Showtime series Queer as Folk: "For a moment, I wished that I, too, could be a lesbian. Then I remembered I'd have to eat pussy, so I said forget it."
Fortunately for the same 99.9%, that still leaves the real lesbians and bisexuals (though most of these are not interested in "performing" for the benefit of straight men), the bicurious, and the straight girls willing to pretend to be bicurious in order to get male attention.
And like I said, I think more people than not are bicurious, if not actually bisexual, even if many would never admit it.
I'm Your Man
Why do girls like guys with a little bit of gay in them?
Notice I said more "people" than not are bisexual, and not just more "girls." You didn't really think the author of The Female Gaze would leave it at that, did you?
Good. ;)
Everybody knows that straight guys have a lesbian fetish, but it's much less commonly admitted that straight girls have a gay fetish. It works on exactly the same principle as the lesbian fetish: one person I'm attracted to kissing another person is hot, two people I'm attracted to kissing each other is hotter!
There is a huge community of women who read, write, and watch gay erotica, often in the form of fanfiction. It's called "slash."
You see the same effect with the popularity of slightly androgynous, feminized men among many women, especially teen girls, who may feel safer in the new and often mine-filled territory of love and sex with someone "more like me." Think River Phoenix, Titanic-era Leonardo DiCaprio, or Zac Efron. The music scene has had popular bands who dress and sometimes act "gay" onstage for decades, and again, many of these bands are most popular with girls and women.
Many straight girls outgrow this stage. Others don't. And few outgrow an appreciation for pretty men shoving their tongues down each others' throats. That one's hardwired in the eyes!
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Comments
I think the easy answer is they all WISH all girls had a bit of lesbian in em! lol Kudos for writing this edgy article!
It is a beautiful thing to be a woman. We are truly fantastic, awe inspiring creatures. However, I've got to say I'm damn glad not to be a lesbian because women can be high maintenance, needy and all together crazy bitches! Funny, that's all a part of the beauty.
Thanks for reading, Whitney and Blue Lotus!
"I think the easy answer is they all WISH all girls had a bit of lesbian in em!"
I nearly wrote that, but I really do believe there's a grain of truth in their wishful thinking. Unfortunately for them, my experience has been that only straight girls feel the need to show off for the titallation of men! Why would the real lesbians and bisexuals bother?
I long pondered answering this request but I find that trying to explain this matter as eloquently as you have would be an exercise in futility. Good work kerryg, loving your hubs.
Scott
Stem cells are the body’s “master” cells that replicate and differentiate into all other cell types in the body. They are the building blocks of organ tissue, blood and the immune system.
Thanks, Scott! Glad you enjoyed!
I do think a male perspective on this request would be interesting, though. For example, slash fandom periodically has some extremely interesting discussions about the morality of one historically objectified and marginalized group (women) objectifying another marginalized group (gays). Do men have these sorts of debates?
Depends on the men. I can't say much for my generation of males however. I'm somewhat out of my peer group. As for my perspective, as a male, I can admit that I believe, with exceptions of course, that almost all women have an innate attraction to other women. Its not hard to imagine really. Men and women have their differences but we are built of the same stuff. For the most part I feel this applies to male/male attraction as well although social norm has long demonized this practice.
I figure that female/female attraction slipped under the demonization radar due to the overwhelming perception that women are fickle things and that sort of behavior is expected of them. Archaic I know but plausible none the less.
Scott
Ditto to what Whitney05 wrote:
Whitney05 says:14 hours ago
I agree with you... All females have a little bit of lesbian in them... Plus, men are perverts and they want all women to have a little bit of lesbian in them.
i agree that it's more wishful thinking on the men's part! I mean every porn stuff i've seen involved girl to girl action (excuse the term). and why is that?
First off...it's sick!!!!!!!!!!! When a guy sees 2 lezbos...(yes you're gay if you're a girl that kisses girls...) 2 lezbos kissing, in his mind, he just wants to get with both of them. It's like, he thinks they are only kissing each other to get his attention, so that they could lavish all of their attention on him.
This is the same if it were 2 "hot guys" kissing and it turned a female on. She may want them both to be all for her!...OR 2 lesbos kissing in front of another lesbo...
It's a just a selfish thing. Plain and simple.
Drlat,
I couldn't go as far to say that just because you kiss someone of the same sex that you are gay. There has to be some grey area there as I'm sure the social norm would not dictate that I am gay if I give my 4 year old male ward, a kiss before bed. I would think that there has to be some intent involved if one is to lose their title as a heterosexual.
Secondly, I know first hand that two people of the same sex kissing, is many times employed as a non-selfish gesture. Eg. Whether or not a it is a guys idea, suggestion, or otherwise, his girlfriend may kiss or perform sexual acts with another female as a sort of gesture of trust or other non-sugar coated reasons.
Nothing is plain and simple in actuality, just in perception.
Scott
I have several lesbian girlfriends on a platonic basis but I wish it wasn't, so as a straight man I have often wished lesbians I know were not like that!
I think most men who fantasize about lesbians, have a mental image of young and beautiful lesbians. (Babes to put it vulgarly) I would imagine few men get turned on by older or more masculine looking lesbians. So it's just a fantasy, and they all imagine themselves as another 'James Bond' who, naturally, could 'turn' a lesbian!
LOL, Women are beautiful, Two women is even more beautiful(dont tag me as a pig yet im gettin to a point lol). A man can be pretty, but two men doesnt make the mental image prettier. I often refer to women as flowers. Analogy: One flower is beautiful, a group of flowers is even more beautiful (bouquets) lol. Pretty men are more like sport cars. Just look better by themselves. Two sport cars next to each other just clash of some sort. lol. thanks for the read!
Hy. Nice hub! There's a lot of truth in this. I am very impressed. I know that a lot of girls have crushes. I had a cruch for years on Jolene Blalock, the american woman actress. Girls have crushes, even on teachers! Nice hub! I'm a fan!
Great hub! :) keep up the fantastic writing
Great hub! I'm one of those girls who enjoy men probably too much, that's why I enjoy writing M/M and M/M/F erotica. I'm a fan of QAF and some fan fic so I totally get it.
Even though, writing about lesbians is a turnoff for me.(I can't get into it and it feels forced so I stick with my men.) Yes, I think somewhere inside there's a little curiousity pulling me here and there. I put myself in my gay male characters shoes and, I admit, it's fun. I write in his POV and it's exciting!
Although I don't answer to . . . straight, gay or bi? I understand the excitment of homosexually in both forms, gay and lesbian. Great hub!
Very well written and spot on. Very funny with the quote from Queer As Folk.
A girl that I dated a few times admitted that she had been with another girl. She said it was fun and exciting because it is taboo but she wants to do it again.
Whitney05 says:
11 months ago
I agree with you... All females have a little bit of lesbian in them... Plus, men are perverts and they want all women to have a little bit of lesbian in them.