Fake Ads for Fun
A fun exercise is to create a fake ad. It's all the more challenging if you try to make your ad humorous. Using well known public domain stereotypes is an easy way to develop your skills and connect instantly with readers.
Any writing exercise sharpens your skill. It helps fill up the moments when you're trying to think up new ideas, or (Heaven forbid) when you've got writer's block.
Here are a few examples. I hope you create some of your own, and I hope above all you have fun!
Fake Ad One: Wolf's Demolition
B. Wolf Demolition Service. We Huff 'Em and Puff 'Em! Put us to the test. If your old building isn't flattened in two seconds or less, the next building's free!*
*Offer not available for brick houses.
Fake Ad Two: Goldilocks, Private Eye
Goldilocks Investigative Services. If we can't find out, no one can! We leave no stone unturned, no door untried. Wild animals? No problem! Missing persons? You bet! We also offer our taste testing services. You'll be amazed by our accuracy in predicting which recipe is just right!
Fake Ad Three: Cinderella's Shoe Store
Cinderella's Fantastic Shoes! Come on in and see what we have to offer. We specialize in carrying unusual sizes, and our styles are out of this world! Want to add some sparkle to your ballroom wardrobe? Well, you've come to the right place! See our ad in the local Town Crier's Gazette.
Special Announcement: The Society for the Humane Treatment of Mice meets this Wednesday. Pumpkin pie and pumpkin squares will be served!
Fake Ad Four: Muah ha ha!
Wicked Queen Health Foods offers the finest in home remedies. We specialize in treating conditions such as insomnia and restlessness. Ten percent off for new customers! (Repeat customers are rare, so virtually all customers are new.) Ugly people welcome! In fact, only ugly people welcome. If you're beautiful, get out of town! (Thunderclap!!!)
Fake Ad Five: Three Pigs Construction
If you want it built in a hurry, hire us! Three Pigs Construction is the fastest construction service available. We've been known to get houses up within a single day. Our work is guaranteed to be 100% reliable!* No one builds it speedier than we do!
*Not guaranteed against B. Wolf Demolition Service.
Fake Ad Six: Baby Bear's Home Security
Trust someone who knows what it's like to have a break in. I have developed the finest home security system in all the world! No one will get past my state-of-the-art electronic anti-burglary device. This equipment reflects a stroke of unlimited genius! I guarantee the thieves and vandals will be running for the hills at top notch speed, or I'll gladly give you a refund.
First, we'll leave a trap. Place some hot cereal on the table, and mix purple dye into the bottom of the bowl. That will mark your criminal for sure!
Next, put a whoopie cushion into your favorite easy chair. When your surprised unwanted guest jumps up, she (or he) will bump her head on a branch of cactus! (What genius!)
Finally, leave a live squirrel in your bed. I know it sounds strange, folks, but our squirrels are trained for business. We guarantee those who break and enter will be bitten multiple times by these voracious, razor toothed climbing acrobats!
Think of More!
Think of more! The more you think, the better your mind will work when it boils down to something more serious. In the meantime, take a refreshing break and allow a little silliness to bring someone a smile!
If you do decide to give it a try, leave me a comment so I can read it!
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