Main character

 you were in everything i wrote

for a really long time.

i didn't mean for you to be

you just seemed to come out of me

and then, time went by

and i saw you again

and then

everything that i wrote

so horrifically far away from me

came to be

every fantasy

was alive

i felt like i was on fire

and then

it was gone

gone like i knew it would be

if it ever actually came to be

and i mourn the loss

more frequently

than you would think

than i would ever think myself

sitting outside

amidst the rain

with my mp3

listening to songs

that tug on my shirt

and rip at my soul

music that takes me back

to the daydream

i fell into.

you found me

and came to me

and swept me into fu*king Narnia

and i cant escape that it happened

i cant let it go

even though

it is over

and not to be repeated

because, i find

that i cant trust myself with you

you leave me breathless

you leave me pure

and yet

somehow corrupted

funny enough

aparently you think i was the one

that was dangerous.

then why am i the one

curled up in bed

holding onto a love that is gone,

a wound i refuse to heal

and a mischance.

yea though i walk through the valley

of the shadow of sorrow

glancing behind me

when i should look straight to tomorrow

i cannot help wondering

if i turned back and looked

if just one of these times

you would be there

and the force would be strong enough to pull me back

to the pleasure filled pain filled mind blowing fire storm Oz that was you.

with the kiss of a shoulder

i was taken away

clinging to the ruby slippers that i never wanted to use.

click click

and i was home

like a terrible and wonderful nightmarish fantasy.

my mind wears it like a confortable old sweater

that it refuses to get rid of.