Memories and Meatloaf

Iced meatloaf it was called when I was raising my growing brood. It was meatloaf iced with mashed potatoes and sprinkled with cheese (either shredded by the manufacture, or more often shredded with the apple peeler.

I’m making meatloaf today, only it is iced with brown rice and cheese. (Ah how things change when you age) Also it is more vegetable filled than meat filled. However, I want you to know I did put meat in it.

Is this all about meatloaf? Not in the least. This hub is about memories and how it is so very important to build them. The meatloaf brings up memories, good memories.

I have a daughter I call and when she is leaving the house, to my inquiry as to her destination, she will often say “building memories Mom.” She is a fantastic mother, as are both my daughters.

It dawned on me that I had never thought about building memories; healthy children, yes; happy husband, most definitely, but never memories.

Now, in my later years of life I realize how important these memmories are and I would urge you, most especially you young folks, to think long and hard about the kind of memories you are building for and with your children.

Memories can make or break your child’s future. They can shape their personality and even contribute to their success or down fall. I know, I have done it all.

I have given good memories (although not nearly as many as I wish) and I have certainly left a bad taste in my children’s mouth at times.

I was a very young mother and stayed that way until all my children were grown. It is sad for them, that they do not have more good memories. It is sad for me that I have not realized the good memories that we did have.

Today I yearn to recall and I work to cherish the memories of my children as young ones.

However (and you know me, always look on the bright side), I do find that my children are building such good memories with their children and yes, even with me, on purpose. Some of those memories are so powerful that when I recall them I laugh or smile; sometimes shedding a tear of joy.

I have been so blessed with children who have grown up to be wise and loving and forgiving. Blessed, blessed, blessed!!

My point is…take your child or children someplace special each and every month that is a day just for them. Go to McDonalds, the park, the zoo, or the museum; whatever and give them your undivided attention.

If you have several children, plan alone time with each of them. It is worth it, I promise.

You know what is in the heart of your child (and if you don’t, make hast to find out). There is not a child alive that does not grow and bloom with the love and attention of their parents.

When they do not have this attention, they eventually wither and die, unless they are blessed to have someone come along who sees their need and fills it. I had such a friend. Actually I still have her. She lives far away, but we keep in contact.

Good memories are when parents pay attention to their children, even if it is to be reprimanded and set straight. Bad memories are when they are unjustly punished or put down for things they did not do or when the punishment far outweighs the crime.

Good memories are when our children’s accomplishments are praised and brought forward with joy. Bad memories are never acknowledging, or seldom acknowledging when our children excel in anything, (track, swimming, cleaning the yard) anything.

Bad memories bury the good ones in a heartbeat. Sometimes if the child is not strong, all they recall as grown-ups is bad memories. They become judgmental and become the parents they so much dislike.

It is sad. Many suicides and unhappy people arise from such situations. It can break a heart to know you could have made a good difference in someone’s life and you did not.

However, the past is just that! If you can help to diminish those memories by building good ones with your adult child… do it! If they refuse to let you, it is their choice. Let go. Know you have tried and there are other things you can smile about and help with.

I’m not sure this is well coordinated. I just know it is on my mind and I wanted to share with you.

I am filled with good memories and I refuse to let the bad ones rule my life. My parents are dead, so I chose to recall the love they tried to bestow upon me, not the pain they caused.

In other words I forgive them. If you have someone who needs your forgiveness…freely give it. If they refuse, it is no longer on your shoulders. Give it to God and let go.

Happiness I wish for all of you and your children and your parents.

Go build those memories!! Make the effort and reap the benefits!!


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18 comments

WillStarr profile image

WillStarr 5 years ago from Phoenix, Arizona

I envy those with enough foresight to have taken lots of pictures and written the places and dates on the back.

I also wish I had kept a daily journal. What a treasure that would have been for me had my own parents kept one.

Great Hub Pixie!


sueroy333 profile image

sueroy333 5 years ago from Indiana

Nice job. Making memories is important.

I'm with Will, I wish I would have written down or taken pictures of more than I did!


Pixienot profile image

Pixienot 5 years ago from Clarksville, Indiana Author

Will, you are so right. All we can do is preserve the here and now as best we can and rely on sometimes unreliable memories. Thank you for the kind comment.

Sueroy, thank you for your comment, also. It's never too late to start!!

Smiles to you both.


LoraKayAlexander profile image

LoraKayAlexander 5 years ago

Enjoyed reading.


Pixienot profile image

Pixienot 5 years ago from Clarksville, Indiana Author

Thank you, LoraKayAlexander, for reading my work. Thank you very much.

We put our work out here hoping to have it read and enjoyed!

I'm going to go look at your work now!! Thank you!


b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 5 years ago

What a Beautiful Hub on Memories...and Meatloaf to boot...You have so grown as a writer my friend...This was a rich and rewarding read for all of us...And "Forgiving" is the best reward of all.


Jillian Barclay profile image

Jillian Barclay 5 years ago from California, USA

Dear Pixienot,

I may just try this iced meatloaf! And even though I am older, it may just be the one with the mashed potatoes! Sounds yummy!

As for memories, it is funny what stands out in our kids' minds. Sometimes, my grown kids will start talking about something that made a huge impact on them and I don't even remember it. Just who were they living with when these things happened? Please don't tell them I don't remember, they are currently insisting that I have always had alzheimer's! But that is probably because I was born when dinosaurs roamed the earth, according to them...

Memories are all we have in the end. They are everything!


Pixienot profile image

Pixienot 5 years ago from Clarksville, Indiana Author

Dear B,

I can always count on you to boost me up! Thank you for your kind words. I am very happy that you like my hub.

I agree, to forgive and be forgiven is the best gift and reward of all for a long and sometimes painful life. It is the ultimate.

Dear Jillian,

Let me tell you, I much prefer the mashed potatoes. Spread them out over the meatloaf, put little pats of butter (or whatever you use) and then spread with shredded cheese. Yum, yum, yummy!

Funny you should say that about remembering (or not remembering) as I just a few minutes ago hung up from one of my daughters and she was remembering a rather important milestone in her life and I totally cannot recall it...not at all.

Hey, I used to ride dinosaurs, too! :)

Memories are everything! We need to be so aware of that when we speak, act or live.

Thank you for reading and enjoying my hub.


Jillian Barclay profile image

Jillian Barclay 5 years ago from California, USA

I enjoy ALL of your hubs! You write with such feeling, how could I not? The sincerity and warmth that you have shines through every single time! Now, if we could just bottle that and sell it...


cuzwewanna 5 years ago

thanks mom


Rosie2010 profile image

Rosie2010 5 years ago from Toronto, Canada

Hiya Pixie, oh this is so touching and very helpful for those who haven't got sweet memories.. it's never too late to build some good memories. Both my parents are dead too, and I treasure all my sweet memories of them in my heart. Thumbs up and beautiful.

Have a nice day,

Rosie


Pixienot profile image

Pixienot 5 years ago from Clarksville, Indiana Author

Thank you so much, Rosie. I'm glad to have been able to share this with everyone.

Baby girl, you are so welcome!

Jillian, I'd even buy it myself! Thank you so much for your support.


cbris52 profile image

cbris52 5 years ago

Great Hub!


Pixienot profile image

Pixienot 5 years ago from Clarksville, Indiana Author

Thanks cbrus52, for your kind words and hopefully your vote. It is certainly appreciated. Words are everything to a writer, as I am sure you know. Thanks again.


ACSutliff profile image

ACSutliff 5 years ago

Such nice thoughts! I so enjoy the reminders of childhood memories just from reading this. I don't have many (since those planned moments you mention were few and far between) but the ones I have will stick with me forever. I can't wait til I have children to make memories with.


PR Morgan profile image

PR Morgan 5 years ago from Sarasota Florida

Great advice from a loving and thoughtful mother!


Pixienot profile image

Pixienot 5 years ago from Clarksville, Indiana Author

AC, thank you for your kind thoughts.

With your attitude, I hope it is soon that you have those children. I suggest you write in a journal so those memories can always be recalled.

I told SueRoy that it was never too late, when actually she has done a great job in pictures to document her memories, good an bad.

The reality of it is that it is never too soon to keep and make memories.

Even today you have memories that will fade. Get in the habit of documenting them. Family, friends, trips, activities. You will never regret it and you will be in the habit when your little ones begin to arrive. :)

PR thank you very much for your comment. I truly appreciate it.


Pixienot profile image

Pixienot 5 years ago from Clarksville, Indiana Author

Dear PR, I did not purposely forget to acknowledge that your comment made me smile and feel good all at the same time. Please forgive me.

I cherish every one of my comments even if they do not agree with me. That's what hubpages is all about.

I so appreciate you stopping by. Miles and miles of smiles coming your way. :)

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