The Year of Treading Lightly: Crying Through a Questionable Year

Courtesy: stmpoems.blogspot.com
Courtesy: stmpoems.blogspot.com

I

By God, I cannot sanction the world within

helpless and horrible it writhes

begging for benevolent release.


Cruel with scathing appraisal

untold sorrows and anticipations ache, disharmonious and

leashed in clever attendance

discordant melodies, constant companions.


The solace of my stance

reeks of lies now forgotten

crafted with studious care

becomes me

I am told.

Courtesy: small--lady deviantart.com/?offset=5
Courtesy: small--lady deviantart.com/?offset=5

II

My studied presentation

swells, evolving within

ancient borders that crack and peel

requiring studious tending

circular with constant repair.


Refined and tempered by seasons past

polished glass reflecting

rehearsed serenity.


The advancing days cry out for

singular attention

how to address such monumental need?

III

Mirrors shatter, scathing in judgement

content, I laugh at their whispers

and inhale the aromas

arranged as obedient soldiers

and choose to meet time.



More by this Author


Comments 76 comments

Green Lotus profile image

Green Lotus 6 years ago from Atlanta, GA

This is so moving lorlie. Your poetry is deep and beautiful and you glow from within. Wishing you days of sunshine :)


Moulik Mistry profile image

Moulik Mistry 6 years ago from Burdwan, West Bengal, India

Loved the message here, beautifully written...


Cathi Sutton profile image

Cathi Sutton 6 years ago

Laurel, this is stunning! I am so impressed, my friend! these lines...

Refined and tempered by seasons past

polished glass reflecting

rehearsed serenity.

... seemed to just reach out and touch me! Beautiful. What talent you have!


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 6 years ago from Bishop, Ca Author

Wow, thank you all!

Green Lotus, I have every reason to expect sunshine! You're a doll and an inspiration by the way!!!

Moulik, you are gracious in your praise and I thank you.

Cathi, this is my very first attempt at poetry! Really...Talent? From you, my friend, that means so very much.


VioletSun profile image

VioletSun 6 years ago from Oregon/ Name: Marie

Lorlie: I just read your comments, that this is your first attempt at poetry?! Wow. I was moved by your words and photos, its beatiful dance of words and images!

This stirred my emotions:

"Refined and tempered by seasons past

polished glass reflecting

rehearsed serenity."

You are talented, so keep writing! You remind me a little of Cris., not sure if you follow him, he does exiquisite Photoshop art and writes beautiful poetry.


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 6 years ago from Bishop, Ca Author

Thank you, VioletSun-I appreciate your words, and yes, this is my first one. I think in poetic terms, but never had the courage to publish.

I'm off to see Cris. I haven't seen his work.

Thanks for stopping by!


Cris A profile image

Cris A 6 years ago from Manila, Philippines

Glad you stopped by my hubs as it led me to here. This poetry is full of restrained power. Thanks for sharing :D


sheila b. profile image

sheila b. 6 years ago

Very moving.


tantrum profile image

tantrum 6 years ago from Tropic of Capricorn

Very good, lorlie !! :)

'discordant melodies, constant companions.'

makes me think of 'Discordianism' LOL!


kowality profile image

kowality 6 years ago from Everywhere

Happy Easter Lorlie..This is incredible. Please publish more of your Poems.


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 6 years ago from Bishop, Ca Author

Thanks Cris, for coming here-I admire your work so!

sheila b., thanks for your comment, much appreciated.

tantrum-you're such a kick, girl!

kowality, I'll work on some more, and thanks for stopping by!


rmcrayne profile image

rmcrayne 6 years ago from San Antonio Texas

Wow Lorlie. I'm impressed! I can't begin to imagine writing something so profound.


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 6 years ago from Bishop, Ca Author

Thank you, rmcrayne-I never thought I could do it either!


Faybe Bay profile image

Faybe Bay 6 years ago from Florida

Lorlie, this is so moving! It touches me on so many levels. I tread lightly in so many places of my life, like walking on egg shells. I am learning to change, but it's not here yet. I think it's "money" if you have none you are constantly trying to stay back, because you feel helpless to do anything... I love this poem.


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 6 years ago from Bishop, Ca Author

Wow, Faybe! What an awesome comment. It's amazing, isn't it, how we must be-oh, so-careful of others at times, and end up forgetting ourselves.

I am so very glad you stopped by.


Dialogue 6 years ago

I'm impressed. A moving and poignant piece of work. Thanks for sharing it with us.


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 6 years ago from Bishop, Ca Author

Thanks, Dialogue, my pleasure!


samboiam profile image

samboiam 6 years ago from Texas

lorlie6, this is fantastic. Very moving. I have linked it to my latest poem "Why Do You Judge Me?" I hope that is okay.


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 6 years ago from Bishop, Ca Author

WOW, Sam, I am honored. This is my first link-that I know of-so thank you. I just saw "Why Do You Judge Me?" in my email, so I'll see you soon-must read!


Mystique1957 profile image

Mystique1957 6 years ago from Caracas-Venezuela

You are a natural! Poetry flows from your spirit and quill in gentle and soothing verses. I truly loved it!

Thumbs up!

Warmest regards and infinite eternal blessings,

Al


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 6 years ago from Bishop, Ca Author

You're too kind, Mystique! Thank you for the thumbs up, and for the lovely words of encouragement.


George J Hardy profile image

George J Hardy 6 years ago from Southern New Jersey

I am impressed with this poetry as it shows us a person who knows themselves well.


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 6 years ago from Bishop, Ca Author

George-thank you for your kind words. I hope I know myself well-I know I try!


tonymac04 profile image

tonymac04 6 years ago from South Africa

I found these poems very moving, very deep in feeling. Yo certainly have a waywith words!

Love and peace

Tony


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 6 years ago from Bishop, Ca Author

Thanks, Tony, that means a lot coming from you!


Pamela99 profile image

Pamela99 6 years ago from United States

Very moving poetry. I am impressed with the depth of feeling it evokes within. Thank you


Justine76 6 years ago

"The solace of my stance

reeks of lies now forgotten

crafted with studious care"

ouch, damn that light treading... this was really really awesome!! Don't be shy, keep it up!!


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 6 years ago from Bishop, Ca Author

Pamela-I appreciate you stopping by!

Justine-I know, heavy, huh? :)

Sometimes my head is in that place!


habee profile image

habee 6 years ago from Georgia

Very moving, with great word choice. Good job!


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 6 years ago from Bishop, Ca Author

Thanks, Holle-I'm glad that you came by!


prasetio30 profile image

prasetio30 6 years ago from malang-indonesia

simple but understanding. I like something to the point. And I found it trough your hub. good work, lorlie6


ralwus 6 years ago

Now that is most excellent prose Laurel. You must do more, it becomes you very well. I loved the metaphors


Dolores Monet profile image

Dolores Monet 6 years ago from East Coast, United States

Beautiful, Laurel! As truly wonderful poetry can do - this felt personal, as if it came from inside of myself, only I could never fashion the feelings with such grace and creativity. Your poetry rocks!


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 6 years ago from Bishop, Ca Author

prasetio-thank you very much for reading.

ralwus-you are too kind, dear sir!

Dolores-I'm extremely happy that this touched you, I'll keep trying, then!


Sage Williams profile image

Sage Williams 6 years ago

The words you have chosen ring so clearly of precision beauty and melodic rhythm. What a truly amazing way you have with words.

Sensational! Rated up!

Sage


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 6 years ago from Bishop, Ca Author

Thanks, Sage-I really appreciate your words.


Lady_E profile image

Lady_E 6 years ago from London, UK

This is lovely and deep Lorlie.

I enjoyed it.

Best Wishes. :)


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 6 years ago from Bishop, Ca Author

Thank you, Lady_E. You're a dear hubber to me.


prettydarkhorse profile image

prettydarkhorse 6 years ago from US

lovely, beautiful and crying out for love and care which shines in you, Maita


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 6 years ago from Bishop, Ca Author

Thanks, PDH, for such lovely words.


Petra Vlah profile image

Petra Vlah 6 years ago from Los Angeles

Such a pleasure to dicover you as a poet as well. You are great, so keep on writing. Poetry is all around us and you can see it better than most because you have the natural gift of recognizing beauty and sharing emotions


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 6 years ago from Bishop, Ca Author

Thank you so much, Petra. I am pleased that you stopped by to comment!


Rebecca E. profile image

Rebecca E. 6 years ago from Canada

very well done, and excellent, of course rated up and stumbled so there you go.


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 6 years ago from Bishop, Ca Author

Thank you, Rebecca. I really appreciate it!


Aley Martin profile image

Aley Martin 6 years ago from Sumner, Washington,USA

Keep writing poetry dear one!!! This is AMAZING! Such depth and emotion! Excellent!


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 6 years ago from Bishop, Ca Author

Thank you, Aley-I really appreciate your encouragement!


James A Watkins profile image

James A Watkins 6 years ago from Chicago

Wow! This is great! "and choose to meet time" Thank you for the deep thoughts and fine poetry.


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 6 years ago from Bishop, Ca Author

Thanks so much, James!


cosette 6 years ago

i second all the "wows". i am not sure i fully grasp the entire message, but it is beautifully written. (and i love that violet eye). rating UP...


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 6 years ago from Bishop, Ca Author

Well, cosette, it's going to be one hell of a year, and I'm pretty hard on myself wondering if I can get through it all with any 'style' whatsoever. Or dignity.

Thanks for coming by.


Micky Dee profile image

Micky Dee 6 years ago

This is very passionate. And I see "style and dignity". Thank you Ma'am!


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 6 years ago from Bishop, Ca Author

Micky-thank you for riding through!


Duchess OBlunt 6 years ago

lorlie6, you have a gift. This was an awesome piece of work right from the heart. Thank you for sharing it with us!


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 6 years ago from Bishop, Ca Author

Duchess, thanks for your encouragement. It comes from a writer I admire without doubt!


kaltopsyd profile image

kaltopsyd 6 years ago from Trinidad originally, but now in the USA

*snap, snap, snap...*

Deep, very deep. I like it very much. I'm a little lost for words right now so... good job. :)


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 6 years ago from Bishop, Ca Author

Wow, thanks kaltopsyd. I really appreciate your stopping by!


epigramman profile image

epigramman 6 years ago

with your hub writing I do not tread lightly - I dive right in there and swim around with contentment and assurance!


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 6 years ago from Bishop, Ca Author

Why thanks, epigramman. I really have been treading lightly this year, crazy doin's round here!


pinkylee 6 years ago

I absolutely loved this poem Lorlie. You are such a beautiful person inside and out.


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 6 years ago from Bishop, Ca Author

Thanks so much pinkylee! I appreciate your recommendation, girl.

Take care, now.


R. J. Lefebvre 6 years ago

Lorie,

A tantalizing poem, but I have to study it for a while to feel like I read your intent. My favorit poet is Emily Dickinson. I haven't found any other poet to match her wit; please don't quit, you do have merrit.

Ronnie


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 6 years ago from Bishop, Ca Author

Thanks for the visit, Ronnie-I wrote my 'intent' up in the comment box in answer to cosette, if you want to see it. This year is just so incredibly hard!

I thank you for coming by.


Iggy Sarducci profile image

Iggy Sarducci 6 years ago from Wherever I am now

You have a lot of accolades here, amiga.

For me, on first reading, I liked the last verse best as I'm very sensory-oriented and it has nice visual and sensory cues. Up until that point I was trying to understand what exactly set off this seeming self-criticism, harshness, or intense restraint.

I felt sad about you being so hard on yourself and self-imprisoning. (Which, I guess was the point of the poem!)

But honestly, I started to understand this the third time I read it through. ;) Before that I was wondering: benevolent release of what? What is the monumental need not being satisfied? Why this treading lightly? Mostly it made me curious to understand what you are holding back. Or why. Having read your "Locomotive Lullaby" piece about your upbringing helped me understand more.

It makes me feel, which is good. I wish I understood more though. :)


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 6 years ago from Bishop, Ca Author

Why thank you amigo! Too vague though, I guess, I'm not really sure how to get across some of these feelings. Self-imprisonment is part of what I was trying to get at, but really more to the point is my facade I present to the world-it's exhausting!

This year has been full of anticipation of both good and horrid, and I was trying to convey that I chose to go ahead with the facade-if that makes any sense!

I get very tired being the 'reliable one' in the family, and tried to put that across. You know, being strong and dependable...yech. Just once I'd like to fall fucking apart!

Thank you, Iggy, for your critique-really!


Iggy Sarducci profile image

Iggy Sarducci 6 years ago from Wherever I am now

Yes, I did get about the facade you were putting forth. I didn't get that you chose to go ahead with it, so much as it seemed to take possession of you.

LOL, I love that line, "Just once I'd like to fall fucking apart!" Sounds like you did that in the past, in a sense, by not becoming what the fam expected. In a way, I thought, good for you. Even though the means you used then were certainly not good for you.

Well, I just hope you get to fall apart. And get to feel around for the pieces on the ground, and slowly and instinctively reconstruct yourself in the form that feels truest to you.


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 6 years ago from Bishop, Ca Author

Oh, in the last line, where I say 'and choose to meet time' is where I decide to say 'fuck it!' and just keep going with the old routine. The old reliable self continues to please others...

And, my new friend, I have fallen apart more than once in my life-everyone's got a story to tell, right?

Thanks again for your words, Iggy!


Iggy Sarducci profile image

Iggy Sarducci 6 years ago from Wherever I am now

Oh! Sorry, I didn't catch that.

Falling apart is a great topic for writing. I just fell apart in big ways this weekend, myself.


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 6 years ago from Bishop, Ca Author

If you want, send me an email-I'll try to be a good listener! Or reader, if you will.


sofs profile image

sofs 6 years ago

Wow, was that the cry of the soul trapped inside, crying out for release... the pain .. of being a prisoner in your domain .. wow powerful...

Refined and tempered by seasons past

polished glass reflecting

rehearsed serenity.

the diction, the style is amazing, wow again.. I had to read it a couple of times to get what you are after.

Awesome.. God bless!


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 6 years ago from Bishop, Ca Author

Thanks for reading, sofs. This is my one attempt at poetry, and I'm not so sure it's for me, though I think I did convey my confusion!

I really appreciate the visit.


ahorseback profile image

ahorseback 5 years ago

Laurel , Isn't there a flower named Mountain Laurel, if so then you're it ! I am impressed by your writing , always. I wish for you, moments , hours of serenity , and never any of it rehearsed. OX


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 5 years ago from Bishop, Ca Author

Blushing this early in the morning's got to be bad for me, but thank you!

You're a doll.


tirelesstraveler profile image

tirelesstraveler 4 years ago from California

Beautiful poem. Nice to meet you


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 4 years ago from Bishop, Ca Author

Why thank you, tt! How fun it is to read that word, 'beautiful'. I really appreciate your comment and will come check out your hubs asap!


Victoria Lynn profile image

Victoria Lynn 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

Wow, what masked pain. Beautifully written. Amazing work. I look forward to more. Many votes!


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 4 years ago from Bishop, Ca Author

Thank you so very much, Victoria Lynn! I rarely write poetry and had to go through my mental files to recall this hub.

I truly appreciate your insight to see the pain I was going through.

Laurel

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