Solar Man

Pedal on, Power Dude!
Pedal on, Power Dude! | Source

Oh yeah — it took a while (and a lot of work) before Gif Biffel could emerge as Solar Man!: the world’s first environmental superhero.

Though it required that he refresh his memories of — and notes from — Honors Chemistry II, concocting a sunscreen lotion with an SPF of 14,812 was actually fairly straightforward. Converting tanning-booth goggles to specs capable of shielding solar flares took a bit longer; you’d be amazed how quickly UVA and UVB deteriorate those slender elastic headstraps!

Gif relied on his identical quintuplet brothers Bif, Mif, Jif, and Dif to refine a self-lubricating graphite-alloy exercycle, and to fit it with a power belt of sufficient durability and strength. Grandad Pif modified one of his own high-performance dynamos from beneath Niagara to serve as primary power converter.

Even Grandma Vif got into the family act: her marvelously inventive self-wicking weave gives Gif attire that’s relatively sweat-free and un-chafy.

And so, Solar Man at last arrives on the scene to save us from our obstinate addiction to non-renewable fuels and polluting energy.

Pedal on, Power Dude!     

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