The mysterious blinding light that appeared from out of no where

It's an extremely rare phenomenon that's as old as Fred Flintstone dropping and breaking his daily newspaper from that dinosaur which he was riding to work on. It's something that's always been around, but more recently has become more wide spread. It's like an epidemic that's gone mad, and everywhere you look it seems like they are multiplying, and that there's more and more of them everyday.

On top of everything else this phenomenon can be so shinny at times that they can create a blinding light. If a whole group of them are congregating outside on a sunny day, their bright reflection could possibly even endanger aircraft flying overhead.

If you haven't guessed it yet, and you probably haven't I'm talking about the sudden increase with folks shaving their heads. Yes I'm talking about voluntary baldness. I'll be frank, there are a lot of people who I've known to have a full head of hair all of their life, who have just decided all of a sudden, and right out of the blue to throw in the towel and shave all of their hair off.

One day I was sitting at work during break time with a group of guys who all have a full head of hair. The very next day it looks like I'm surrounded by the Mr. Clean convention from 1977 all over again. I asked several of Mr. Clean's cousins who were all of a sudden hair challenged just what each of them liked and disliked about being bald, and here's what they had to say about their new hair free life style.

Some of the folks who I spoke to, who were not offended, said that they just simply like being bald, along with the hassle free life style that accompanied not having to tend to hair. Others who are rather full of themselves actually believe the baldness is attractive to the opposite sex. Give me a break, and the world's flat too. But according to all of these hairless people the plus side of being bald far out weighs the negative side. Now let's take a look at what my bald buddies had to say about the good and the bad of being a hairless wonder.........................................................................

Mr. Clean wants his hair back!
Mr. Clean wants his hair back!

The plus side of being bald

1. You don't have to worry about the wind messing up your pretty hair anymore.

2. You can skip a shower, and no one will ever know.

3. You will save a fortune on barber shop visits.

4. You won't have the expense of having to buy combs, and brushes.

Homer's really not bald. He still has a couple of hairs.
Homer's really not bald. He still has a couple of hairs.

5. You don't have to worry about anyone calling you a hippy.

6. You don't have to be concerned about dandruff any more.

7. You will save money on shampoo, and hair conditioner.

8. You'll like that cool feeling of a fan blowing over your bald head.

9. You'll be cooler in the Summer time.

10. You'll enjoy rubbing your own bald head.

11. You won't be bothered anymore with your hair getting into your eyes.

The original "Mr. Clean".
The original "Mr. Clean".

12. You won't have to worry about your hair getting into your food anymore.

13. You'll have some extra spare time in the mornings from when you would be normally of been brushing your hair.

The negative side of baldness

1. Your head might get cold in the Wintertime.

2. You'll have to spend extra money on sun block in the Summer time to keep your bald head from baking, and getting burnt in the sun.

3. You sweat a lot more without any hair on top of your head.

4. People might sneak up on you, and draw a face on your head while you are sleeping.

5. You'll have the extra expense of having to purchase a wool hat in the Winter time.

6. There's nothing there anymore to cover up all of that ugliness.

7. You'll miss running your fingers through your own hair.

8. Your brain might overheat without the protective hair cover anymore.

9. You'll have to tolerate people calling you names like cue ball, and milk dud.

There was one nut job that said there wasn't any difference, and that their head stayed cooler with a little hair on it. One question that comes to mind is if the advantages to being bald outweigh the disadvantages, then why doesn't everyone just go ahead and shave their heads? One answer to that question may be that appearance has a lot to do with it, and that some of those melons out there no one in their right mind would want to see. So the next time you experience some mysterious blinding light from out of no where, remember it might just be that one of your friends shaved their head!

This entire hub was written in humor, and I wish to apologize if anyone was offended in anyway.

In a totally unrelated topic, you might want to look around some the next time you're driving down the road. I heard on the radio that 10% of people are driving down the road naked. I'm not sure where they are getting their information, but bald heads might not be the only thing you see when you're out on your next Sunday drive.

I actually use this as my computer screen saver at home. Since I downloaded my two bald friends, I don't even have to turn a light on in the room to see the keyboard anymore.
I actually use this as my computer screen saver at home. Since I downloaded my two bald friends, I don't even have to turn a light on in the room to see the keyboard anymore.

What do you prefer?

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Comments 23 comments

cfin profile image

cfin 4 years ago from The World we live in

This is brilliant!

billybuc profile image

billybuc 4 years ago from Olympia, WA


Faithful Daughter profile image

Faithful Daughter 4 years ago from Sunny Florida

This is too funny!! (lol)

What's going to happen to the Hairclub for Men, barber shops, hair salons, and all hair product manufacturers and suppliers if everyone start shaving their heads? Does this mean bankruptcy for all of them? An increase in the nation's unemployment rate? The cause-effect will be catastrophic! There should be a law against this growing trend! (lol)

xstatic profile image

xstatic 4 years ago from Eugene, Oregon

Where is Kojak when you need him? I see a lot of these bald volunteers around too. I am not a volunteer, just a genetic draftee. So, I have no hair on top, and a lot on the sides, and by the way, why does neck hair grow soooo dang fast? I have thought of shaving it all off the head-knob, but my wife objects, and in some self exploration, I find some "dents" here and there that might give my "top-og-graphy " the look of a sideshow at a carnival, so I guess I will live with invlountary baldness.

susiebrown48 profile image

susiebrown48 4 years ago from Clearwater, FL

I don't know, Vin Diesel makes for a pretty good campaign for baldness. Loved the hub.

lauramaryscott profile image

lauramaryscott 4 years ago from Boise, Idaho

TheHoleStory, I must admit some men are attractive bald. I have two nephews who are barbers; nuff said. Thanks for sharing your humor.

Lipnancy profile image

Lipnancy 4 years ago from Hamburg, New York

You made me laugh again. My husband is balding and usually once a year he shaves his head. Thankfully, long gone are those commercials in the past that used to imply that you could not advance in life if you were balding. Voted Up and Shared

bridalletter profile image

bridalletter 4 years ago from Blue Springs, Missouri, USA

Cute hub. My theory, since it's fatty cells that can stop the growth; I think it is because more men are over weight now. Some hereditary too.

Opulent1 profile image

Opulent1 4 years ago


xstatic profile image

xstatic 4 years ago from Eugene, Oregon

I knew you would get some pushback from the feminine side on this one. Kojak and Isaac Hayes established baldness as a sex symbol years ago.

mackyi 4 years ago

Although I have happened to see more men with hair loss problems, I have known quite a few women with the same hair loss problems. While men are left with few choices -- they can take it off completely which is the cheapest solution, or wear a toupee which is easily noticed and can be easily blown away by the wind. Luckily, women can go out and buy an inexpensive wig, wear tracks, hair pieces or wigs to mask her baldness. I am wondering how some of these women would look if they were to take it all off?

rmichaelf profile image

rmichaelf 4 years ago from North Central West Virginia, where the green grass grows...

My best bud, "T" is going to love this! Nice piece, voted up and awesome!


marshacanada profile image

marshacanada 4 years ago from Vancouver BC

Loved this hub-especially the first part about the blinding light. Voted up and funny. I have always wanted to know what it would feel like to have a hair free head-but have never had nerve to shave mt head.

phoenix2327 profile image

phoenix2327 4 years ago from United Kingdom

I love how you take us down a road that seems familiar and then suddenly veer off down a sliproad we didn't even know was there. Funny hub.

Jamie Brock profile image

Jamie Brock 4 years ago from Texas

This was awesome! Thank you for sharing... Sometimes I would love to shave my head especially in these hot Texas summers. Voting up!

markmic36 profile image

markmic36 4 years ago from Warwick, RI

Bald is beautiful, but I own a lot of hats.

mejohnson profile image

mejohnson 4 years ago

Very funny. Loved #8 for the negative side of baldness.

eHealer profile image

eHealer 4 years ago from Las Vegas

You are Too Funny. I love thick hair and baldies, it depends on the man. Great read and very entertaining. Thank you TheHoleStory!

profile image

elsiebeth 4 years ago

You added laughs to my day.

Lightshare profile image

Lightshare 4 years ago

Baldies are always getting an extra attention. Beautiful hub -)

Mr Archer profile image

Mr Archer 4 years ago from Missouri

I'm not quite to that point, but I am tending towards it. I have my wife cut my hair now, and it's easy: #2 on the sides and back; #3 on top. Leaves it @ 3/8" on top, and less than 1/4" on sides and back. And yes, I do find myself rubbing my head more, and loving the coolness in the summertime. Winter is a bit frosty, but not too much. Thanks for a great hub on a great subject.

kashmir56 profile image

kashmir56 4 years ago from Massachusetts

Hi my friend, great fun hub enjoyed reading it so much ! My brother is one who shaves his head and thinks he looks cool has well. Oh well to each his own.

Well done and vote up and more !!!

Green Lotus profile image

Green Lotus 4 years ago from Atlanta, GA

Funny! i'm no fan of baldies. Give me a guy with long flowing locks. Rated up.

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