One crazy story even for the hub pages

A day comes in everybody's life when they find the urge to move on. That time finally hit me one day when I got home from a very long day at work, and I couldn't find a parking place in the cramped apartment complex where I reside. Enough was enough, and it was time to move somewhere else where I had my own driveway and land which I could call my own. My own manifest destiny came calling.

So one morning I picked up a daily newspaper, and started to read and study the classified advertisements for a place that I could finally call my own at last. There were thousands of houses for sale for all many different prices, but they all were a bit out of my price range.

Then all of a sudden a very bright light bulb went off in my head. My new idea was to buy land, and build my own house. Why not, other people do it all of the time. The prices of land depended greatly on the quantity of acres that you wanted to buy. Some were really way out of my price range, but one piece of land really stood out from all of the others. The price was too good to be true, and my biggest worry was that the land had already been sold.

So I picked up the good old phone, and called the number that was in the newspaper. An elderly man answered by the name of Edward, and he spoke in broken English. I told him that I was calling about the land which he had advertised in the newspaper, and I asked him if it had been sold yet. To my surprise he said no, and that the land was still available. I could hardly believe my ears.

So I asked him if the land was flat or hilly. He said that it could be however I wanted it. I wasn't sure what he meant, so I asked him if there were any trees on the land. He said yes there were some trees, bushes, rocks, and grass. I told him that this all sounded like a good mixture to me, and he agreed that the land was a pretty good mixture.

So I decided that I had to go and see this land for myself. I asked him where was the land located at. He told me that it could be where ever I wanted it to be. I wasn't sure if I understood him correctly because of his broken English, or if he had a lot of different plots of land for sale. So I asked him again if he could give me directions to this land. He told me that he could give me directions to his house, and then he could show me the land. I really didn't understand at this point why he couldn't just tell me where the land was, so I agreed to meet him at his house at a certain time, and go to the land from there.

The directions took me all the way out into the country, and soon there were only big fields, pastures, and woods everywhere I looked. There wasn't a single house anywhere in sight. Finally I pulled into the long driveway of the only house around for miles. It then dawned on me that the land must be apart of all of this property that his house was on. As far as I could see the land was wooded, flat, hilly, and full of wide open fields. I could only dream which section of the land that Edward was talking about selling.

Edward then emerged from this big white three story farmhouse, and introduced himself to me. I told him how beautiful it was around here, and that I could hardly wait to see the land that he was talking about selling. Edward motioned that the land was on the other side of the big cattle barn next to the fish pond.

When we walked around to the other side of the massive barn the view was just breath taking. So I asked him where does the land go. Edward said where ever you want it to go. I said you mean that I can make the property lines go as far, and as long as I want. Edward said when you buy the land, you can do whatever you wish with it.

I got excited and I started walking down a hill towards the wood line, when Edward said where are you going the land is over here. I turned around and the only thing that I saw was an old rusty dump truck loaded up, and over flowing with dirt and brush. I then asked Edward where's the land? Edward said loaded up in the back of that GMC dump truck. I yelled that's crazy, what in the world are you talking about?

Edward then went on to say that earlier in the week he leveled some hills on the back side of his farm, and that he had all of this land left over. So he decided to advertise it in the newspaper, and sell it to make a little money. Edward said that he would be more then happy to spread the land out however, and where ever I wanted it.

Since there's certain language you aren't permitted to use here on the hub pages, I decided to censor the rest of our heated conversation, and quickly move onto the end of this story

After I called him an idiot we both proceeded to have heated words, and then I was asked to leave his property immediately with the helpful encouragement of Edward's shotgun. Since I was on the business end of those two barrels, I didn't waste anytime leaving either. On my long drive home I decided that buying land may not have been one of my better ideas. So to solve the parking problem at my apartment complex, I decided it would be best to just sell my car and buy a bike.