Weird Items Found in My Apartment

I am not a hoarder at all. I don't want anyone to get the wrong impression about me. However, I do collect some strange things. Yes, there are some weird items in my apartment. Don't get me wrong, I don't think I've got the weirdest stuff ever. I don't collect shrunken heads or anything. At least, not yet.

However, I probably do need to get rid of some items. There is a yard sale coming up in my building and I might just participate this year. In past years, I've used excuses like:

• It might rain.
• I don't want to set up a table.
• I don't want to be stationed at a table all day.
• I have to work that weekend and can't take off.
• I would rather sleep.

Yes, I have honestly used that excuse - I would rather sleep! I am seriously considering it this year though. I know I have lots of items that need to go. I have closets full of stuff. Stuff not being used or stuff that doesn't fit. Stuff. And lots of it.

My first strategy is to look around and see what I really need. It is best to determine what type of "merchandise" I really have to sell and then make some decisions about what will go.

I have an assortment of pens with feathers sticking out of the top of them. I am not really sure why I have so many, to be honest. I knew I had one or two. Actually, more like at least 4. I am fairly certain I have some at work, as well.

Since pens serve a purpose though, I can't see any reason to get rid of them. So on to the next.

Well now, that is just classy. Obviously this is a completely practical item to keep. When you touch it, it bounces back and forth. Who doesn't need something like this? I feel like every household is incomplete without a bobble poodle wearing a poodle skirt. So I guess I should move on...

Yet another important item. This elephant is just a keeper. I mean, sure, he takes up space and collects dust. Sure I am allergic to dust and not allowed to keep items like stuffed animals, but I think it is silly to dwell on things like that. We could, of course, consider my age and that I am too old for this. However, those are fighting words, so I guess we can just keep going.

Well, this is just perfect for Halloween. This was purchased to be a part of a Swine Flu Halloween costume a couple of years ago. It was a really great idea at the time. I was going to dress up like a sick pig for Halloween. It would have been perfect if people did not actually start catching the Swine Flu in October and dying from it in my area. Suddenly, the humor in the outfit died along with it. Instead, I had to be something more tasteful. I dressed like Satan's daughter instead.

Oh, I guess I should add the devil horn's to this list, too, now that I think about it. Of course, they can be used again. Also, these pig ears would be perfect for a Miss Piggy outfit. Who doesn't love Miss Piggy? These ears and tail are keepers!

When you think hot tea or hot coffee, you should think goose mug. What better way to drink something than out of a goose mug? I can't think of anything better. Not only is the goose painted on the side, but the 3 dimensional goose handle adds a stylish touch to the mug. I can't imagine any reason for getting rid of something this dignified. On to the next item!

How many people have lightning in their livingroom? I daresay not many! Lightning in a plasma ball is just... well... a ball. You can touch the side of the globe so the lightning will strike your hand. You can make a loud noise or play music, and the lightning will pulse to the beat. Obviously, this is a item that can't leave the apartment. Who can say good-bye to something like that anyway?

I am probably the only person in the world that could ever love these items anyway. I am still not a hoarder. Really. Honest!

What I will do is sell my useful stuff instead. I am going to clear out items like clothes, shoes, lamps, etc. Why get rid of the weird stuff? That is what makes my apartment so awesome in the first place. I can sell the boring items at the yard sale.

As for me, I will stay interesting with what I have already. As long as I don't add new items, I can still get organized and keep what I love. Isn't that what a home is all about anyway?