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Cleaning Toilets, In Violation of Federal Law!

Updated on February 2, 2011

At the Store

While shopping the other day, I faced a major disappointment. My favorite toilet cleaner was not available! For years now, I have bought 'The Works', and let me tell you, it works!

I looked high, and I looked low, but not only did the store not have any, they evidently were not carrying it anymore! How could that be? It was the only toilet cleaner I had ever found that would get the thing clean without great amounts of scrubbing. Why take something cheap, that worked, off the shelve? What, does Clorox have a contract with the stores, demanding that they sell a certain amount of their overpriced cleaner? That certainly seemed to be the case.

After checking at several stores around town, I finally bought one of those overpriced bottles of Clorox toilet cleaners. I thought, "Well, 24 oz is the the largest size, and it is the best $/oz, so hopefully it will do a good job." It did have "NEW & IMPORVED" clearly marked on the bottle...

At Home

Once home, I put all of the groceries away, then went to clean the bathrooms. After all, being out of cleaner was what had forced me out of the house in the first place. I had cleaned one toilet before completely running out of product.

With the new cleaner in hand, I entered the bathroom.

Hmmm... Better read the directions, since each kind is different.

  • It is a violation of Federal law to use this product in a manner inconsistent with its labeling.
  • Apply 6 oz. under and around rim to coat inside of bowl.
  • Scrub entire bowl and let sit for 10 minutes.
  • Do not allow pets or children to access the toilet during this time.
  • Flush toilet.

Six ounces? That is a quarter of the bottle! I have three toilets in this house.

For as much as this cost, it should last at least two months, not barely one week!

Maybe 4 oz would work just as well, then I could make it last at least two weeks.

What's that? In violation of Federal law?

Yep, that is what it says...

So, assuming I read that right, if I do not use a full 6 oz each time, I am in violation of federal law!?! What is I don't leave it for 10 minutes? What if I only leave it for eight? Or get distracted, and it stays in there for half an hour? Looks like I'd be breaking the law!

Now, I want to know somethings:

  1. Who wrote the directions?
  2. Who is checking to see that they are followed?
  3. If it is really so critical that 6 oz be used each time, where is the once counter, to measure as the cleaner, as it leaves the bottle? (For as much as it cost, little gadgets like that should be standard.)
  4. How did Clorox manage to get the Federal Government to write laws about using toilet cleaner? How many Congressmen and Senators did they have to bribe? Furthermore, does congress now have to approve the direction each time the formula is improved? (No wonder this country is going down the toilet!)
  5. Do state rights over ride the federal law? Should I be contacting my local representatives about this? What is Wyoming law concerning toilet cleaner? Well, do you know your state's law concern toilet cleaners?
  6. Can you really go to jail, for cleaning the toilet wrong?

Weighing Risks

 After contemplating the risks of possibly cleaning the toilet wrong, I have concluded that they are just not worth it.  I mean, if someone where to come and weigh my bottle after I had cleaned two toilets, and found that it still held 13 ounces, then my life could be practically over.  I would be joining the likes of Martha Stewart, behind bars. 

From now on, to avoid breaking the law, I will not be cleaning toilets!

At least not with that cleaner............... 

......................now, off to read some other bottle.... I need one that is not so picky, or pricey.

Ivorwen, 2010.

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