TOP 13 Pick-Up Lines For Beltane

(Pagan Humor/Jokes)

Since today is Beltane, I thought I would share with you my Top 13 Pick-up Lines for you to use at your Beltane celebrations! Why only 13 you may ask? Well, after all, this is a list for Wytches!

May Your Beltane Fires Burn Bright!

13. Guy: "That ritual gown is skin-tight baby... How do you get into it?" Gal: "Well... you can start off by getting me a chalice of mead."

12. "Hey-hey, is that a magick mirror in your pocket - because I can see myself in your pants."

11. "If I said you had the body of a Goddess - would you hold it against me?"

10. "Hey babe, what's your sign? What's it's ascendant? What's your Moon...?" (*caresses your butt*)

9. "Read any good Llewellyn Books lately?"

8. "Would you like to come over to my place and get busy kickin' wytchy-boots?"

7. "Hey beautiful, your feet must be tired... because you've been spiral dancing in my mind all night long."

6. "Haven't I seen you in another life before?"

5. "Wow... You have the most beautiful third eye I've ever seen."

4. "So... do you do The Great Rite here often?" or "So... ya wanna jump the bale-fire together?" *wiggle eyebrows*

3. "What's a georgous Nymph-Goddess like you, doing in a Circle like this?"

2. "Yes, I'm handfasted, but that's not a "legal" marriage.... but we *could* go out in the forrest for a Greenwood Marriage..." *wink*

And the TOP BELTANE PICK-UP LINE IS......... *Drumroll please*

1. "Is that a Maypole in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?"

 

GREAT BELTANE STUFF ON AMAZON!

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Comments 11 comments

pgrundy 8 years ago

Happy Beltane Raven! Thank you for reminding me--I feel better already. Now I have to excuse myself and try some of these out ...

(o;


Raven Emrys profile image

Raven Emrys 8 years ago from Salisbury Author

And a joyous and magickal Beltane to you dear!

Hope you find great success with these pick-up lines. I have personally tried out a few of these myself, (all before I was married of course). Now I just jump on hubby and ravish him! LOL!


tjmum profile image

tjmum 8 years ago from Isle of Wight

Oh, so funny! I loved doing the maypole dance at school - I think they've now stopped it because people know what it actually means these days! No more fertillity for me though. Two boys is more than enough.


Karen Ellis profile image

Karen Ellis 8 years ago from Central Oregon

Very amusing.  I'm surprised I understood all of them, third eye, ascedand, all of it. I'm cancer with leo ascendant. 

Happy Beltane


cjcs profile image

cjcs 8 years ago from Albuquerque, NM

A most welcome laugh (especially #12). I hope you are rewarded three-fold.

Joyous and fulfilling Beltane to you.


Raven Emrys profile image

Raven Emrys 8 years ago from Salisbury Author

Greetings tjmum,

Me too! I especially like getting to do the big maypole dance at our local Ren Faire, (talk about a huge maypole!)

Our school is still letting them dance the pole - so not all schools have stopped it just yet. It might just depend on what part of the bible belt you live in.

Thanks for the comment!


Raven Emrys profile image

Raven Emrys 8 years ago from Salisbury Author

Dear Karen,

Well far out lady! Glad you liked (and understood) them all!

Thanks for the comment hun!


Raven Emrys profile image

Raven Emrys 8 years ago from Salisbury Author

Hey there cjcs,

So glad you got a laugh! Thanks' for the sweet comment!

Hope you had a wild and wonderful Beltane!


Princessa profile image

Princessa 8 years ago from France

I enjoyed this... a good laugh!

I'll be looking forwards to more hubs from you. I am new to the Pagan tradition and I think that I will be learning a lot from you.


compu-smart profile image

compu-smart 8 years ago from London UK

Im not a big fan of using chatup lines but funny still and im sure has there place!!

I was not sure what beltane meant nor i feel many others that popin here so....courtesy of wikipedia:)

Beltane is the anglicized spelling of Bealtaine (Irish pronunciation..Its the Gaelic names for either the month of May or the festival that takes place on the first day of May. The Gaelic names for either the month of May or the festival that takes place on the first day of May..

:)


Funny Pick Up Lines 8 years ago

Hahaha these are pretty funny!

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