Spy Gear: Buy Spy Stuff Online

Herein we present a compendium of spy gear and equipment that can be ordered online. Keep track of what's going on above, below, and around you with clandestine equipment that would make James Bond cry out in jealousy.

Should you spy on people? We're not here to judge. How you spend your free time is certainly up to you: be sure to remain squarely within the boundaries of the legal system. Whatever you elect to do with our spy gear, always know what's fair and what's not. No one wants their privacy invaded against their will.

Someone could be watching you as you watch others: whoever has the most lawyers will probably emerge victorious. 3-letter organizations backed by taxpayer borrowing just might be parked outside your office in nondescript panel vans bristling with antennae.

Spy on the entire planet with this scope that's specially engineered to improve night vision. 5X magnification is included along with a spotlight to stealthily illuminate spyable objects. This device is extremely light: less than 10 ounces. You won't be slowed down by your night scope when the time comes to make a dramatic escape.

Most people, including spies, do not posses good night vision. Relatively speaking, some people have better night vision than others, but compared to a cat or a person with a flashlight, we don't see very well in the dark. These glasses will give you a decided advantage over everyone else who is stumbling around and stubbing their toes on things they would otherwise be able to easily avoid in the daylight.

No self-respecting spy comes in from the cold without spy-specific sunglasses. These optically designed models will complement any clandestine outfit. Even an undercover spy wants to look cool when the heat is on. 100% UV protection is provided, which spies and non-spies alike will both appreciate.

When people see you wearing these glasses, they will immediately assume you are a spy. They will subsequently wonder if you may not be a spy because your eye-wear is too obvious. Eventually they will decide that you could not possibly be a spy due to your willingness to stand out in a crowd. At that point, their guard is down and you can spy on them very easily.

Spy on your vehicle with this ingenious device. Attach it to a wayward car, truck, or boat and you'll always know where it is. A GPS geo-location system reads real-time data from orbiting military satelites. This information is triangulated to determine the precise physical location of the device, and by extension the precise location of the vehicle to which it's attached. The thing actually emails you to keep you informed. It even sends text messages. The backup battery lasts for up to 7 days, so you have plenty of time to find your car regardless of where it's hidden.

Spy gear can be bulky and problematic to transport in original containers. No self-respecting spy wants to lug hidden cameras, recording devices, telecommunications equipment, kevlar vests, and bullet-proof argyle socks unless it can all be packed into a fashionable tote. These darling handbags shout "I'm not a spy, but if I were, I'd still be carrying this handbag!" Functionality and fashion are provided in equal measure.

Disguise your eyes when they get dark and baggy. Even the most skilled spies need a little makeup now and then. Artemis Gordon may or may not endorse this product, but we suspect he would have appreciated a little help when he was dressing up like a barmaid in order to obtain information from confederate-sympathizing terrorists bent on overthrowing the Grant administration.

Subscribe to Eye Spy magazine to find out what other spies are thinking without actually having to hang out under abandoned bridges or trendy spy bistros. You'll receive the latest in spy gossip, sports scores, and exercise regimens all discretely disguised as a spy magazine, which no one would suspect as a real magazine for spies. "Hide in plain sight," as they say.

Tuck the latest issue of this magazine into your nondescript but ultra-cool messenger bag. Spend a few leisurely hours on a nondescript park bench in an average city: you'll be surprised how many fellow spies you'll meet. Spies want to remain anonymous, but they still crave the comfort and solace of other spies. There's no better way to infiltrate the ranks of spy communities.

Real spies rarely go barefoot, unless they are engaged in clandestine surveillance on the beach. This fashionable spy shoe tells the world you're not really a spy, but you just dress like one. Of course, that means you actually are a spy, but by the time any civilian deciphers your footwear riddle, you'll be reclining comfortably on a midnight train to Budapest. Black and brown uppers are available. All models are guaranteed not to contain recording devices or knockout gas.