Thailand's Hypocrite Johns - Sex Tourists That Don't Pay For Sex

Sex Tourists In Thailand
Sex Tourists In Thailand
The New Shark Club
The New Shark Club | Source

The way that westerners look at Thailand is often hypocritical, the media is buzzing with reports of sex slaves, human trafficking, and child prostitution. Often this is overstated, as in the case of the documentary film "Bangkok Girl", which has been criticized for faking the death of a prostitute, as well as a recent scandal involving "The Grey Man", a foreign aid group that has been accused of faking cases of child prostitution, in order to justify it's own existence. There is undoubtedly cases of these kind in Thailand, just as there is in any country in the world, however it is my belief that it is far less common than the western media represents it to be.

When male tourists travel to Thailand, they are often thought of as "sex tourists", and their colleagues, friends and family back home may even gossip about them, or question them about their trip. The fact is that most single male tourists travel to Thailand with the intention of sleeping with Thai women, and even those who don't, often find themselves giving in to the temptation. While most people in the West are disgusted by this, having lived in Thailand my entire adult life, I look at it differently. It is easy to criticize what you don't understand, and those who make the most noise, often have the least understanding. One of the most informative books on the subject was written by a mother and daughter from Finland, who spent several years in Thailand, and took the time to research the subject before offering criticism. The book is titled "Thailand Men's Paradise?"

In the book the women tackle the subject of "hypocrite johns", young men that sleep with prostitutes, and yet they don't pay them. The twisted logic indoctrinated into their minds is that by paying for sex, you are exploiting these women. Amazing as it seems, they are convinced that by sleeping with prostitutes and not paying them, they are somehow less exploitative, an absurd illusion. Nevertheless, this is undoubtedly enough to satisfy most of their critics back home, and they proudly speak of their conquests in which they did not have to pay. Some of these men might be honest with the women, and others might make grand promises that they never intend to keep.

One of the most distasteful attributes of hypocrite johns, is that they are often the first to criticize "sex tourists", referring to them in a negative light, and proudly exclaiming that indeed they never pay for sex. Even many of the paying sex tourists will take part in discussions about "the other guys", those who they feel are "the real sex tourists". You won't meet many guys in Thailand that will admit to being a sex tourist, however there are many that will be happy to point one out to you.

I don't consider myself a sex tourist, however I am sure there are a lot of soccer moms in the Bible Belt that would disagree with me. Not to say that I have never paid for sex, who could make such a bold claim, surely any man that has ever been divorced can assure you that we all pay in the end. My point is that I don't spend my days sitting around chirping about people who might be a lot like myself, because that would make me a hypocrite.

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maxoxam41 profile image

maxoxam41 5 years ago from USA

What are you trying to do embellish prostitution? Men who go to Thailand versus China definitely go for sex, cheap sex! You pay for it or not it is still exploiting kids, young girls! Why is there many Europeans and Americans in Thailand, Cuba or Brazil? Why aren't they in Jordan, Syria, Saudi Arabia?

Thailand, Brazil are Meccas for pedophiles and sexually frustrated men!

Charlieboz 5 years ago

to maxoxam41; probably the reason most guys don't go to Saudi Arabia is that it is illegal for 'infidels' to go. But hey way to know your stuff! Syria is going through a revolution at the moment so you're on a roll! Oh & China has prostitution as well, lot's of it in fact, just like pretty much every country in Asia. Way to show you're an idiot though

Tony Crossley 5 years ago

If we define 'sex tourist' as a person who travels away from home with the intention of having sex, then I along with virtually every man I have known since my late teens has been a sex tourist whether travelling abroad or up town to a nightclub. Willingness to pay for the hoped-for sex is an irrelevance. Most single women hope for a 'holiday romance' and will invariably have sex in the back of mind if not right at the front. In short, virtually every unattached adult male and many females too, when away from home, is a sex tourist if not actively then passively.

Tony Crossley 5 years ago

@maxoxam: Seeking sex with adults has no bearing on seeking sex with children. These are two entirely different issues. I regularly ask this following question and have yet to receive a rational reply that is not based on the anti-sex dogma of religion: In this age of 'freedom' and 'human rights', where is the freedom or morality in forcing 2 adults to risk a criminal act in willingly making an exchange that gives at least one party needed pleasure or relief and the other party needed financial gain?

TravelinAsia profile image

TravelinAsia 5 years ago from Thailand/Southeast Asia Author


Unfortunately I had to delete the rest of your comments, as you went over your limit for ignorant, irrelevant, and asinine commentary. This discussion has nothing to do with exploiting kids, and the fact that you make reference to it shows what a sick puppy you are! If the fact that the article falls short of condemning prostitution bothers you, I will not offer an apology. The purpose of this article was not to condemn anyone, but to point out that many people who condemn others are hypocrites, and it seems like you may fall into that category!

TravelinAsia profile image

TravelinAsia 5 years ago from Thailand/Southeast Asia Author


I will add that you made reference to my having sex with Thai women, as if this is something I should apologize for? I will let you know that I am married to one, and have been for 11 years, we have an 8 year old child. I have lived my entire adult life in Thailand, I hardly feel like I have to apologize for anything, or offer anyone an explanation.

TravelinAsia profile image

TravelinAsia 5 years ago from Thailand/Southeast Asia Author


Thank you for the intelligent commentary, if you are ever in Chiang Mai, look me up, I will buy you a beer!

Tony Crossley 5 years ago

Thank you for your comment. Looks I will have to wait for a reasoned answer to my question. Lol, it always those sort over the edge.

TravelinAsia profile image

TravelinAsia 5 years ago from Thailand/Southeast Asia Author


As I said in the article "those who make the most noise, often have the least understanding"

Lele 2 years ago

This arltcie is a home run, pure and simple!

Jefferson 2 years ago

Hi Kids, I can't think about more exciting prcjoet you could pick, this one fits you like a glove. I know you will be good at this, you already are!!! I am happy for you, what a great way to live, keep exploring, keep going. This may be sofar the biggest adventure ever for the two of you, but I have no fear, you my friends, are smart, intelligent and very resourceful people, you will just keep climbing every mountain , singing in any rain and keep(ing) smilling doing it. You are my inspiration, where the heck is the spelling check oh well, you understand, I too am from (far) out of town. Let me know if Jean and I can help with anything, we will give it try. Love Zdena

Emma 2 years ago

Could you recommend a digatil camera? My Canon PowerShot DS800IS fell (into water) and only recovered about 50%. I really need to replace it. What's important to me? Point and shoot, light and easy to carry, anti-motion, good resolution in poor light, some optical telephoto, ability to take a few minutes of video once in a while. I'm not a high-end photographer, rarely do I print an 8 10. Most of my work is shared on the internet. I just enjoy keeping a record of where I go and whom I am with. Love to give people a little memento of something we've done together. I don't have an iPhone (yet). Thinking about it. Wasn't quite ready to jump yet. But should I get an iphone to take pictures with?

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