A Rake’s Progress in One or Two Easy Stages: Part One


As a result of a rather rash act on my behalf, many years ago, I was diagnosed as being Schizophrenic. Of course that worried me, and I wondered what would be the result if it were true. I am vaguely bi-polar as you know, but as that term had not been invented all those years ago, Schizophrenia seemed like a good shot in the dark.


Let me explain

One evening in late Summer, I found I was at a loose end and in need of something to occupy my time. I sought the company of George de Lancy de Somerville de Smith de Ceased de Brown de Tergent. Well, why not?

If you have read any of my earlier works, you will be aware that George de Lancy de Somerville de Smith de Ceased de Brown de Tergent was a friend of mine in Perth, West Australia.

He was a young man of many interesting and admirable qualities, most of which evade me at the present moment, but he had a capacity to entertain, and that was a quality I craved at that specific moment. Normally I would have thought better of this, and would have found another person to share my time with, but George was very entertaining and could make me laugh.


And laugher was what I needed most at that particular time. He was also within easy arm’s reach. George lived on the other side of Mount Street; opposite to my mother’s flat.


On this particular evening, I had had an argument with my mother, over some trivial matter, and as a result had stormed out in a childish manner, having shouted at her and brought her to tears.


I don’t know why we argued… or, more correctly, why I argued with her. She was the loveliest person and was adored by many of my friends. In fact, there were many of those individuals who, I suspect, put up with me and my selfish ways so that they could stay in touch with my mother. I was told on more than on occasion that they would have preferred to have her company of an evening, even if they were out and about, doing the things that those in their early twenties would be doing, rather than to put up with me and my childish ways.

My mother was known for, not only being fun to be with, a great conversationalist, and a person with a very open mind, but also she was known for her kindness and compassion.

One example was her care and empathy for a friend of mine, Lorna, who had suffered from great depression, and had, in desperation, gone to my mother to cry her soul out to her and to confess to wanting to commit suicide.

My mother had listened for hours; had encouraged and shown Lorna great love and understanding; had also encouraged her to continue with her painting, an art in which Lorna was extremely talented. And to reassure Lorna that she would always be available to her to go to and be able to listen and advise, she had persuaded the girl to entrust the sleeping pills to her. The sleeping pills with which she had planned to end her life. My mother kept them in the bathroom cabinet at her flat, rather than let Lorna keep them in her own flat, where they might become a temptation and a danger to her.


I knew all this, naturally and knew my mother to be an exceptionally wonderful woman, so I didn’t feel proud of my actions in arguing with her, but childish pride, another form of pride; differing from the former, had prevented me from apologising to her and so I was “out and about” with time weighing heavily on my hands and, as I have said earlier, at a loose end.


Daiquiri

George and I, together or separately, realising that alcohol in one form or another would oil the wheels of humour, repaired to the Cocktail Lounge of the Savoy Hotel, in Hay Street, where he drank a few Gins and Tonic and I acquainted myself with a newly acquired love, the Daiquiri… several Daiquiris, in fact.

I had been fascinated by the idea of the Daiquiri being a favourite of characters in the plays and novel of Tennessee Williams, and thought I would honour the man’s talent as a writer, by encouraging several of those cocktails to slip down my willing throat. This was all done in an attempt to show my appreciation of Art, of course. After all, if it was good enough for Sebastian and Violet Venable to sip, then it certainly was good enough for me.

After a while we went downstairs to the ‘Men Only Bar’ where we drank Swan lagers until the barman asked us to leave, as George was maintaining that several of the other patrons looked more like ladies of the night and didn’t fit strictly into the category of ‘Men Only’.


Thessalonia Kiev and Michael step on stage

Finding ourselves back at ground level and in Hay Street, we walked towards West Perth, and somehow found ourselves in ‘The Ulster Tavern’ where we struck up a friendship with a couple of dancers from Madame Barisloff’s Ballet School.

We introduced ourselves.

“I’m Michael,” stated the boy, shaking our hands.

“And I’m Thessalonia Kiev,” continued the girl.

“Jenny Millard” corrected Michael, and we were soon friends.

George decided there and then that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with the female Ballet Dancer, Thessalonia Kiev, or Jenny Millard as Michael referred to her, and after one or two drinks, or maybe more, George, Thessalonia and Michael left together; George, tearfully telling me that he would never forget me and that I was the best friend that he had ever had. He bade me a fond and very lachrymose Goodbye, and disappeared into the night with his two new friends.


Left to my own devices, I decided that I would go and say Good night to my father and was walking up Hay Street towards West Perth, when a car drew up beside me.

George jumped out of the car, and wrapping his arms around me, told me at length how he forgave me for changing his basic skin tones from pallid to bright orange earlier in the year. He told me between sobs of gratitude how the afternoon he had spent almost completely submerged in a bath full of permanganate of potash laced water was possibly one of the happiest afternoons of his life. Then he got back into the car and departed again.

His two new friends, the ballet dancing couple, waved sweetly as the car drove off, blowing kisses and crying out, “Good night, Sweet Prince” to me.


So I wandered along Hay Street in the general direction of West Perth. There are lovely houses and flats in the area, and I knew that my father and his wife lived in one of the flats, but a combination of several daiquiris and Swan lagers had drawn a rather opaque veil over my mind and I wandered around for a while wondering where my father lived, and wondering even more whether I would ever reach a familiar building.

I knew that he lived in Ord Street. Or was it Outram Street? But I was beginning to give up hope of ever saying “Goodnight” to him, when my eyes opened wide to reveal; not my father’s flat, but two large stone pillars, iron gates, a gravel path, and at the end of the gravel path, two large half-glazed doors, showing, within, a rather interesting marble staircase, leading up to the first floor of a really lovely building, blazing with lights, and completely empty of a living soul.

The light drew me like a wayward moth and I pushed open one of the large gates, walked rather unsteadily up the gravel path and reaching the half-glazed doors, opened one.

Absolute silence. The place was deserted.

Then, as I watched, a door to the right, at the top of the stairs, opened and a young girl of about fifteen came through and walked along the other side of a balustrade, making towards a door on the opposite side. She was wearing a dressing gown, and carrying a towel and toothbrush. She hadn’t noticed me standing at the bottom of the stairs.


Wwor-r-r-r!!!!

“Wwor-r-r-r!!!!” I said, in a voice that was meant to carry.

It carried.

The girl looked down from her place at the top of the stairs.

“Wwor-r-r-r!!!!” I said again... well not exactly said, but repeated in a loud carrying voice.

It had the desire effect. The girl shrieked. I don’t think she was at all frightened, but she just thought she should join in.

“Shrieeek!” went the girl again.

“Wwor-r-r-r!!!!”

By now several girls, also in dressing gowns and carrying towels and tooth brushes, appeared at the top of the stairs. Several girls also appeared out of the door to the right, and were looking over the balcony to see what or who was making all the noise.

“Wwor-r-r-r!!!! Wwor-r-r-r!!!!” I repeated. And suddenly pandemonium broke out. Girls were shrieking and laughing and several more were trying to discover who I was.


It was obvious that I had entered a house belonging to one of the girls’ boarding schools that are dotted around Perth and its suburbs. Decent middle class schools catering, in part, for the female children of the farmers and out of town families of West Australia.

But decent middle classed school girls or not, they and I were having a whale of a time. And so was I.

Each time I uttered the drunken “Wwor-r-r-r!!!!” they responded in good heart with shrieks and laughter.

And each time I uttered a “Wwor-r-r-r!!!!” I ascended a couple of the marble steps, getting closer to the excited and laughing girls.


How long this would have gone on, I have no idea, but suddenly there appeared, from a side door at the bottom of the stairs, a short, fat, Nun. She appeared to be quite cross.

The Nun waved her hands at me as one would at a naughty chicken, and whether she thought I was a chicken or not, she addressed me as such.

“Shoo!” she cried, waving her hands and a white cloth that she held in her right. “Shoo! You naught boy. Go away or I’ll call the police.”

But unlike the chicken she assumed me to be, I didn’t Shoo, but moved towards her:

“Wwor-r-r-r!!!!” I said, and for good measure, “Wwor-r-r-r!!!!”

The assembled girls laughed. One or two made an attempt at a frightened shriek.

Bishop and, underneath, Rugby playing Bishop

But suddenly I realised I had met my match, because, out of the door that had released the short, fat Nun, there appeared another. But this Nun was neither short nor fat. She was built on the lines of a Bishop, and a Rugby Playing Bishop at that. She was huge and she was very angry.

At her appearance, every one of those shrieking, giggling girls disappeared as if by magic.

The Large Nun glowered at me from beneath grey, frowning eyebrows, and barked one word at me.

“Go!”

I went.

I closed the large half-glazed door carefully behind me.

As I stumbled down the gravel path, I took a quick peep over my shoulder. Nearly every window had at least one figure standing in it. But the sight that quietened my drunken soul, was the large figure standing on the other side of the front doors; her hands on her hips. I felt I could see her malignant eyes glaring at me as I turned and fled.

And so I decided to go home. The thought of wishing my father and his wife a Good Night had left my mind and I thought that home seemed the place to be.

The long walk back down Hay Street wasn’t nearly as much fun as the trip up, as I was now by myself. George, who had accompanied me for half the distance, had wandered off with Thessalonia-Jenny and Michael to start his new life and it was just me. I also wasn’t as fuelled with alcohol in some of its interesting forms, and it was getting late.

I was wandering along carrying my shoes, as I preferred to be bare footed when possible, when a car drove past me, slowed, and came to a stop. As I reached the car, I heard a voice from the driver:

“Do you want a lift?”

I stopped, bent down to see who spoke. A middle aged man in a Summer suit smiled up at me pleasantly.

“Errm…” I said.

“Hop in,” he said, and leaning across, opened the car door, “Hop in!”

I still had about a half hour’s walk ahead of me, so said, “Thanks,” and slid into the passenger seat.

“Where to?” he said, and we started off. I told him I was going to Adelaide Terrace.

We had been driving for a while when he turned to me and said,

“You’re lovely and brown. Go to the beach much, I suppose?”

“Hm-m!”

“I suppose you have an all over tan. Ha ha!”

“Hmm?”

Silence.

He started again:

“I suppose you go to Triggs. There’s a lovely beach up there where nobody goes… Very private. You don’t need to wear bathers.”

“No. I go to Grant Street,” I said, beginning to shift a little uneasily in my seat.

“Lots of sand hills there. At Grant Street. I bet you get your all over tan there, you naughty boy,” and he laughed. He patted me on the knee and smiled.

“Do you fancy a drive to King’s Park? Or the Causeway?”

“I just remembered,” I said, “I want to see a friend. I think I’ll get out here and walk the rest of the way.”

”But we’re still a long way from Adelaide Terrace.”

“No, this will do.”

He stopped the car, and smiled encouragingly.

“Are you sure?”

“Thanks for the lift.”

I walked the rest of the way home.


Walking towards home, I made my way down to Saint George’s Terrace, and walked along the pavement on the right side. Passing Government House, I felt the usual sweet melancholy I always experienced when I smelt the frangipani in the darkened bushes over the brick wall. I stood for a couple of minutes with my hands on the low brick wall, my face forward; my eyes closed, and gently breathing in the scents that always reminded me of my childhood in India.


Gradually I felt a soft wave of emotion creeping over me, like warm water lapping around my bare feet and slowly caressing my calves.

I looked down, almost expecting so see my feet buried in soft sand in the shallows of a white sand beach.

But I was standing on the grey flagstones of a deserted street in Perth, with my shoes on the wall beside me and suddenly I felt slow, soft tears running down the sides of my nose.

“You all right? Are you sure about King’s Park?” came a voice.

I turned around.

“No, I’m Okay”

And the man in the Summer suit waved, started his car, and drove off.

Returning home later, I noticed that the light was on in George’s flat, and on inspection, I also noticed that he was leaning over his balcony, taking the night air, and polluting it somewhat by smoking a cigarette.

I thought George had said that he had aimed to spend the rest of his life with the Female Ballet Dancer.

“Hello, George,” I called out to him in a friendly manner. “Where’s the love of your life?”

“Ah!” said George. George, if you may remember does not tend to be hyperbolic in his conversation. He says what he has to say, and that inclines to be that.

“Finished?”

“Ah!” said George and disappeared into his flat.

George’s relationships tend to be dramatic, intense and spontaneous, but they also tend to be brief.


I walked up the outside stairs to my mother’s flat, opened the fly wire door, opened the front door, and closing the fly wire door carefully so as not to make a noise, I entered. Walking across the living room I opened the glazed door to my bedroom; a small enclosed balcony room with views across the Swan River to South Perth.

I sat on the bed, and putting my shoes, which I had been carrying, onto the floor, started to undress, ready for bed.

Somehow the world had slowed down, or I had, but everything seemed so peaceful and every movement I made seemed to be in slow-motion. Sitting quietly, I could hear a lion in the South Perth Zoo, roaring in that sad and plangent tone that the lion uses. Was he lonely? Did he miss someone? Up close it might have sounded louder and perhaps less melancholy, but the placid waters of the Swan River acted like a sounding board, and the deliciously evocative and sad tones reached my ear to increase my feeling if ennui, overlaid with melancholia.

Slowly I undressed, and still, the feeling of timelessness and weightlessness pervaded the whole room. I looked at my hands. In the moonlight that filled my room, they looked almost white. A man’s voice briefly whispered in my ear.

“You’re lovely and brown. Go to the beach much, I suppose?”

I stood up to take off my trousers, and was about to get into bed, when a thought struck me. I suddenly knew what I should do.

I went to the cabinet n the bathroom, and there, on the top shelf, beside a bottle of nail varnish remover and a little box of orange sticks and an emery board, stood the bottle of sleeping tablets.

I looked carefully at the label. It read: “Hugh Howling – Chemist” and below that, the simple instructions as to how many should be taken. Lorna’s name was written neatly below the instructions.

I took the little bottle of tablets back to my bedroom and sat on the edge of the bed again.

“Bugger!” I said; I had forgotten something. I went to the kitchen and filled a drinking tumbler with water and brought it back to my bedroom.

Then, very carefully, I shook one of the tablets into the palm of my hand. A little round, white tablet. I swallowed it and drank a sip of water. I have no trouble with taking tablets. Some people get quite worried about taking tablets. It’s easy for me.

I shook another little round, white tablet out of the little bottle into the palm of my hand and swallowed it. I drank another sip of water.

I shook the remaining tablets into the palm of my hand. Carefully moving them with the index finger of the other hand, I counted them. There were still thirteen left.

“Oh this is deadly boring,” I thought. The whole world seemed to be leaning into my little bedroom, watching, holding its breath, waiting.

With one movement, I placed all thirteen tablets in my mouth, swallowed them with a couple of gulps of the water in the glass, and then placed the glass on the bookcase close to my bed.

There was a small notepad and a pencil on the bookcase. I picked them up and wrote these few words:

“Don’t blame me. Blame the system.”

Then I got into bed.

I could still hear the lion roaring plaintively from his home at the South Perth Zoo as I drifted off to sleep.


More by this Author


Comments 61 comments

Lady Wordsmith profile image

Lady Wordsmith 4 years ago from Lancaster, UK

Ian. You are so brave, to bare your soul to us. This is beautiful, and I would know it was written by you even if you hadn't told me, because it has your own incredible inimitable style, evocative, sensitive, and a feast for the senses, as well as the heart. This is wonderful. Sad. Beautiful. Thank you.

Someone very close to me took an overdose just a few years ago. I know what it feels like to watch from the outside - I've never heard it described quite like this from the inside. On to read the second part, so I can understand a little more.

In fact,

Thanks for SHARING!

Linda.


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 4 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Linda, my dear friend, than you for that wonderful comment. You keep me on my toes, Linda, and I am sure that I try just a little harder, knowing that you appreciate what I try to do.

It was a "it has to be said" story, but I hadn't realised how much until, a few weeks ago, an old girl friend referred to the incidents surrounding it, and asked point blank if the "sewerage pipe" attempt were local gossip, or a fact.

I tried to describe it to the best of my ability, with all the ambivalence that seems to be attached.

x


Lady Wordsmith profile image

Lady Wordsmith 4 years ago from Lancaster, UK

I am inspired by you Ian. I would like to try to put down some of my own memories, though I don't know if I would share them, I'd have to think about that. It's not so much that I have to say things, but after all, we're told so often to 'write what we know'. Might be worth a try. I don't think I have anything to say about my own life that's half so interesting as yours though.

The ambivalence is quite strong, because you don't tell us too much. You just put the story there, and let us make what we will of it. And because of that, it stands alone as a story, without extraneous detail that I think would take something away (perhaps, perhaps not).

Lx.


Becky Katz profile image

Becky Katz 4 years ago from Hereford, AZ

Well, I know I left a comment. I must have forgotten to push that pesky button again. Either that or it was stiff and I went on to the next without making sure. My comment was "Silly old coot, don't you know you're just supposed to take one?"

Now I feel better. I am going to add, it sounds like you almost got tangled up with a nasty man. Don't get into cars with strangers.


nemanjaboskov profile image

nemanjaboskov 4 years ago from Serbia

I must admit that this is probably the first hub that I have read from you, and I see that I have been foolish - very foolish... This is beautiful writing, very sad, extremely honest and can't wait to read the second part of this beautiful story...


Sunnie Day 4 years ago

Dear Ian,

Such a look into your life, so honest and raw. Your words always bring your story to life. So you growl...makes perfect sense to me...drinking a bit much can turn us into a different animal...lol good for you!I felt like I wanted to jump on that man, beating him senseless to save my drunk friend...I wanted to be up in the balcony, yelling for you to get up here this instant and quit walking the streets.. I am sure the combination of the alcohol, the events of the night added to the mood of the night...You just wanted to sleep and forget...You had thoughts about the system (maybe the world) and all its strange perplexities... even then..Ian Dorking Clark...you are such a master of writing. I am so proud to know you and I always get so excited when I see you publish. Thank you! Hugs!


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 4 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Linda I appreciate the comments. It is true, I would find it difficult to write about anything I didn't know, and I don’t think I would ever attempt to anyway.

Okay, I suppose I was very lucky with my background and the different countries, and people. I am not bragging, because I don't think that that word applies, but my life has been absolutely full of incidents... My friend Steve (Hubber steve of ian fame) has mentioned so many times that almost every situation, place or person that he refers to seems to have a “I remember when…” from me.

I have not told anybody about all these incidents until now, but have had then forming and reforming in my mind for many years, so when I saw it written down, I noticed, as you did, that certain very important incidents and situations are not mentioned by name, and it depends on the reader to decipher, or to go away scratching his head.

You notice that the “S” word doesn’t enter the tale, although it is pivotal.

There are one or two details which were very important, and I have not even included them. maybe there is a feeling within me that this will be part of a more extensive story, and there will be memories drawn out… I don’t know.


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 4 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Becky, my mother never told me not to go with strangers, But I was safe. I was too lazy to get into situations that I couldn't cope with.

Mind you, I have walked home on many occasions, rather than... But that's another story.


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 4 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Nemanja, I am so happy to see you here. Please come again and again. You are most welcome, and can assure you that they are not all as miserable as this.

Thanks for the visit.


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 4 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Sunnie, that is such an inspiring comment. I needed a guardian angel some times, and maybe it was you, coming out of my future, as you shared my past with me today.

As I have said already, this is the first time I have told this tale, except for admitting it to Annie we she was here in November, so it has been stewing inside me, forming little sentences into paragraphs and paragraphs into the whole story. I didn't write it... I lived it, and it dragged me along with it.

Thanks for your visit and the lovely comment.


Sunnie Day 4 years ago

I am happy that you wrote it down...now you can just let it take flight forever in time. Thank you for sharing this story, for being bold and honest. We are not defined by our pasts...just what we learned from them I would hope..xoxo


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 4 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Yes, there is already a feeling of everything fitting into place, and I am finding I can can look at myself a little more honestly now.

But I still can remember:

"'And how are you feeling now?' he asked me.

'I’m better' I said."

And the silly bugger left it at that!!!


Sunnie Day 4 years ago

I think maybe that might be a man thing too..honestly..He says you can leave..You think good deal..that's behind me! Very normal I think...It is then placed in a box not to be opened again until now..:)


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 4 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Do you know, Sunnie, that the more I write, the more I think of incidents and happenings and the amazing things that have occurred, that if I started writing them now, I would never finish. I know I am a slow writer, and it takes me forever to write a hub, as story, a poem, but I am crammed full of them like a huge tube of word toothpaste, and the more you squeeze me, whether from the middle of the end, there's more that's ready to come out.

I'm only about a third through my British India stuff.


Sunnie Day 4 years ago

Wow! Well lucky us! :) You are a never ending well of stories and that is a good thing. I think by you taking your time really makes for a great read...thought is put into it meticulously and that is not a bad thing at all... :)


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 4 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Thank you, my friend. We must talk soon. I want to know about your Peeps, and how they are getting on.

And it would be nice to hear your voice again.


snakeslane profile image

snakeslane 4 years ago from Canada

Hello Mr Lawns. As usual your writing is brilliant. I am hearing the Lion's roar. Your characters are fully drawn. I am with you every step of your barefoot way, and appreciating your 'altered' state of mind. Regards, snakeslane


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 4 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Thanks, Snakeslane. I hope you can manage the next Part. Hoping you enjoy it.

That word "brilliant" has popped up again, and I am so happy to read it.

In fact, if you were to be here, you would see a very silly smile on my face.

Most gratefully received.


snakeslane profile image

snakeslane 4 years ago from Canada

You are very welcome, but it is I who must thank you for delivering yet another exquisite read to my page. I feel very honoured to be sharing this moment with you, so please, by all means grin and smile away...I am on my way to part two. There was a delay as I went for coffee in the hotel I am staying at, and was locked out of my room, but that is another story.


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 4 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Hotel? You must be posh.

Locked out of your room?

I feel there's a hub hidden in there somewhere.


snakeslane profile image

snakeslane 4 years ago from Canada

Hi Ian. It was a morning of back and forth down endless corridors. There is a story for later. I am very far from home on a heartbreaking family errand. Quickly coming unposhed as it's been a costly journey. I can't tell you any more right now, but it is incredibly sad.


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 4 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Oh! I am so sorry. The last thing you wanted to read was an old tale of someone hurting those around him.

I hope there is a better outcome to your errand than you now envisage, or am I just whistling in the dark for you?


mckbirdbks profile image

mckbirdbks 4 years ago from Emerald Wells, Just off the crossroads,Texas

I think I picked up gum on my shoe following you toward Adelaide Terrace. You sprinkle your stories with the precise amount of detail to fill us with images. We follow where your words lead and come away amazed, as if, we spent a quiet hour at a cinema.


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 4 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Thank you for your visit, Mike. You always surprise me with your elegant comments. I somehow appreciate my scribbling that much more when I read your words... they make them more relevant.

I hope you enjoy Part Two as well.


Nellieanna profile image

Nellieanna 4 years ago from TEXAS

My dear Ian - I'd been waiting to comment, first of all for the smoke and debris to clear from my car accident and the tiresome details following it up and then my birthday and the nice details during and following it, all of which are just far too trivial by comparison with your masterpiece and its profound meanings. I couldn't have them overshadowing.

Then I also thought I'd wait to comment for your return but I simply can wait no longer.

My awe is too palatable. I say 'ditto' to each elegant comment already posted in praise, awe and empathy and/or sympathy with this Part 1 of your story, which leaves us teetering on the brink of the next part, where I shall go now. No doubt it will amaze.

Hope all is proceeding well with you NOW. I've been thinking of you frequently.

Hugs and thank you for sharing this amazing and poignantly beautiful story with all of us who love and deeply admire you.

Nellieanna


Docmo profile image

Docmo 4 years ago from UK

Ian, our ability to takes us though such fascinating tapestry of memories, event and emotions is absolutely brilliant. The writing is raw and revving with energy, yet the shades of humour, self-deprecating or otherwise, infuses your hub with such poise. I am truly awestruck by the writing. Well done!


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 4 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Nellie, I hope you enjoy what you find when you travel on to part 2. A slight change from my usual style, but the cast of characters will no doubt, be familiar in a slightly darker dress.

That you for your comment, and Yes! Everybody has been very kind and obviously walked along that path with me as I took my hedonistic little stroll.


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 4 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Docmo, your comments are kind and very heartening. I mean to convey not only the personal, without delving into morbidity, and you have seen that I can find a wry humour in all aspects of the human condition (Well, my human condition).

Thank you for finding this and reading it... I hope the other part does not disappoint you.


kallini2010 profile image

kallini2010 4 years ago from Toronto, Canada

Loved this, Ian.

I would not blame anyone... obviously, the pills did not have the desired effect or I would not be reading this.

But your writing did. Your writer's voice carried as it always does.

You say pandemonium. I say life.

Loved, loved, loved this.


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 4 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

My dear friend, Svetlana, I have waited with bated breath for you to find this and to comment on it. I knew that you would understand the significance of every move, and would be walking there (metaphorically speaking of course) every step of the way.

Thank you for your kind comments, and your perception.

Ian


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 4 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Svetlana, if you haven't read it yet, or you have, I hope you enjoy, and can empathise with part two.


d.william profile image

d.william 4 years ago from Somewhere in the south

Loved this first part to your tale. I don't usually like long narrative hubs, as they tend to be boring and repetitious. But yours is well written and riveting and the length was of little consequence. The sign on a good writer. I look forward to reading more of your words.


kallini2010 profile image

kallini2010 4 years ago from Toronto, Canada

Of course, I intend to read the 2nd part.


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 4 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

d.williams, I feel the same about lengthy writing, and I am afraid that there are many who think that quantity will make do in the absence of quality.

Having said that, there is little that I have written for Hub Pages that is not lengthy, but I can honestly say that I have made a concerted and honest effort to not fill it with padding and to write with some style.

I hope I never fail to entertain or satisfy you.

Thanks for the visit.


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 4 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Thank you, Svetlana.


d.william profile image

d.william 4 years ago from Somewhere in the south

Your comment regarding those who think quantity equates to quality is exactly why i find long narratives not so enjoyable here on hubpages.

If the first two i read of yours are indications of the quality of your writings, i can assure you that i will not be bored in reading any of them, regardless of length. I will definitely re-visit to enjoy more of your works.


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 4 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

d.williams, I have just read your hub, 'Unnatural Love - Can It Be Stopped?'. i loved it. In fact I have pasted it on my FaceBook page with the comment, "Really worth reading. You'll laugh and you will cry, and I hope you will also share it."


mckbirdbks profile image

mckbirdbks 4 years ago from Emerald Wells, Just off the crossroads,Texas

Did Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. fall off the face of the earth? I hear you are writing a book length story. How is that coming?


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 4 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Hello, Mike.

No, the rest of the UK is still where you last put it.

I am still struggling to write a story that has currently 39,000 words, but I am sort of suffering writers' block.

I have two stories going, and the other has about 17,000 words but it is going even more slowly.


Becky Katz profile image

Becky Katz 4 years ago from Hereford, AZ

Ian, my old coot, I have been missing you and thought that since you don't answer my emails, I would come see if you are here. I see you a few places but not many. Love ya and miss ya.


mckbirdbks profile image

mckbirdbks 4 years ago from Emerald Wells, Just off the crossroads,Texas

Hello Ian. Now a bit of time has passed and I see Becky has checked in, so I thought I may just stop by and see if that manuscript is ready to be sent off to the publishers yet. Hope you are doing well; and since there are no reports otherwise I will assume there are. Only one hubber is getting any of your attention, that I know of.


Becky Katz profile image

Becky Katz 4 years ago from Hereford, AZ

I saw him at Docmo's Winnie the Pooh hub. I wanted him to celebrate my first fiction story with me, but he isn't around.


mckbirdbks profile image

mckbirdbks 4 years ago from Emerald Wells, Just off the crossroads,Texas

I think he dozed off. We will wake him from his slumber.


Becky Katz profile image

Becky Katz 4 years ago from Hereford, AZ

I sent him a couple of emails too.


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 4 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Hello Becky and Mike. This is fun receiving all these comments (Yeah! I know that they were conversations between you two, and I and my hub are just the platform, but I can dream!!!)

I haven’t received an e-mail from you for ages, Becky, so where it went, I can't imagine.

I am not doing anything on HubPages at all, except reading other people's hubs WHEN I AM NOTIFIED, but that doesn't happen much. There is something seriously wrong with HP. I don’t hear when someone posts or when someone comments on my stuff, and then it looks as if I am rude and not happy to receive comments.

I am still scribbling away at a couple of stories, and the latest word count is 44,000 and 20,000, so I am being kept busy.

I have managed to sell seven copies of the eBook, so that makes me happy. They are friends and family, mostly, a couple of kind Hubbers and a couple of children (now grown up) I have taught in the past.

I certainly get more of a buzz from these small sales than I ever got from being involved in the AdSense disaster. I would still be annoyed, but what’s the point with an organisation like Google.

Hoping that you are both well and happy and I promise I will come and snuffle out and see what you have written lately... I feel so left out.

Please excuse me writing to you as a “couple” but I know that what I have to say to one applies to the other.

Fond regards and love etc

Ian


Becky Katz profile image

Becky Katz 4 years ago from Hereford, AZ

Good to hear you are still alive and kicking, ya old coot. Love ya


mckbirdbks profile image

mckbirdbks 4 years ago from Emerald Wells, Just off the crossroads,Texas

Hello Ian. It is exciting news that your work has progressed so far and that you are rapidly approaching book length. This must make you have a great sense of accomplishment. If the work is the same quality as everything else we have seen then it will be well received.


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 4 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Alive and kicking. it's true, Becky, but I find most people don't want to be kicked as much as I want to kick them.

I hope you got my e-mail today. I sent it from my phone, but as, for some reason, my phone thinks it is only a thing for talking with, I have to send a picture with every message and attach what I want to say to that.

x


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 4 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Thank you, Mike, for your encouraging words. Actually a novel can be from 40,000 words upwards, so it falls on the right side of that criterion. I don't know how much more there is to write, as it is not a planned bit of scribbling, so we shall see how far it goes.

Your words, as usual, are so kind and make me feel so enthusiastic. Thank you.


mckbirdbks profile image

mckbirdbks 4 years ago from Emerald Wells, Just off the crossroads,Texas

You might enjoy this movie, 'The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel' about some Brits that choose for a variety of reasons to retire in India.


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 4 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

I saw it as soon as it came out, Mike and loved it more than anybody could imagine, unless they knew my soul deeply and intensely.

Maggie Smith and Judi Dench are two of my very favourite actresses (Yes, I still use that word), and I think Dev Patel is a lovely guy.

Of course I loved the architecture and the "La la la" attitude of the staff and management at the Marigold.

There was not a part of the movie that I didn't like. I cried, I laughed, I cried, I laughed all the way through. My friend, who went with me, is a 29 year old Pakistani, so for many reasons (age, country, etc) he might not have liked it, but he also declared it to be one of the very best movies he has ever seen.

I wanted to see it again that week, but unfortunately things didn’t work out, or I would have.

I definitely will buy it when it comes out on DVD.

I looked at buying the book, by Deborah Moggach, but my Kindle hadn’t arrived, and believe it or not, the price since then has increased from about £2.90 to £3.15!!!

I was a little disappointed in the writing when I sampled the first chapter. I think I can write better, but I would say that, wouldn’t I?

It is a brilliant idea for a book and especially a film, when there are wonderful actresses and actors who could pull it off... I think I’ll send my Twilight Lawns stories to Mesdames Smith and Dench, and see what they think.

Unfortunately, Dame Judi is almost blind and would have to ask Dame Maggie, a very close friend, to read her the ‘Twilight Lawns Chronicles’.

By the way, talking about the ‘TLC, Amazon still isn’t selling my eBook, although Barnes& Noble, Apple, Sony, Kobo etc etc. are. selling it, because the people I “published it with are still negotiating with Amazon.]

Grrr!

(I bet you didn’t thing you would get a reply as long as this for just recommending a film, did you?)

Cheers

Ian


mckbirdbks profile image

mckbirdbks 4 years ago from Emerald Wells, Just off the crossroads,Texas

I thought you would like it. It had humor, and pulled at human nature. It had a dash of spice (pun intended). The screenplay was well written, I won't go track down the book. And the subject is one that so many of us are facing. I am not eyeing fondly India as a place to run off to make my retirement funds last longer. As far as I know, they could have been filming in the dead of winter.

I hope all is well with you.


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 4 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

My friend, I mentioned, has told me that when his brother returned to Islamabad this morning after returning from finishing his University course, he was met by temperatures of about 40C (104F). I know that is in Pakistan, but it's all on the sub Continent.

The hottest weather conditions I have been in was years ago when I was in Oman, and it was 134F.

Yes, all is well with me.


Becky Katz profile image

Becky Katz 4 years ago from Hereford, AZ

Ian, I did not get an email from you. I just saw this note that you posted telling me you sent it. I am sorry I was so remiss in checking for it. Love ya.


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 4 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

That was ages ago, Becky.

HP is such crap that nobody gets notified about anything any more. No wonder I haven;t posted anything since the end of January, there's so little point. Half the time I feel people are either pissed off with me or I haven't been in contact,

Or if it comes, it's so late.

Never mind, Have a lovely Christmas and a wonderful 2013


Becky Katz profile image

Becky Katz 4 years ago from Hereford, AZ

A little testy today, are we? Haha, you need to be nice now or I will be calling you an old coot.


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 4 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

No, I'm not testy, I just feel disappointed that HP started out so well for me and then I had a slump, but you and Mike and Sunnie and Augustine dragged me out of the Slough of my Despond only to find I am getting nowhere.


mckbirdbks profile image

mckbirdbks 4 years ago from Emerald Wells, Just off the crossroads,Texas

Twilight, you have gotten to know Sunnie, Becky and Augutine, that is not nowhere my friend!


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 4 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

And you, Mike.

I know you're right, but I have always had my own way, and I hate waiting and expecting people to show a bit of integrity.

Best I just write for myself, That, I can't do without.


mckbirdbks profile image

mckbirdbks 4 years ago from Emerald Wells, Just off the crossroads,Texas

There is an old saying, 'You can't take it with you.' Do you know what a pity it would be if you took what you have with you and did not leave traces of your soul behind for generations to come.


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 4 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Wise words, my friend. Wise words.

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