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A Story About Judging Others

Updated on October 27, 2011

Be Honest!

Do You Judge Others Based on Appearance?

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Is he smart, mean, nice, rude - and how can you tell by looking at him?
Is he smart, mean, nice, rude - and how can you tell by looking at him?


My mother judges people a lot. I don’t want to generalize here, but I think many people my age can say that about their mothers! At least most people that I have met. Then again, I myself may be judging. I won’t give away my age, but let’s just say I’m not in the teenage crowd.

In any case, she judges people all the time. Mostly she judges me and people younger than her. We don’t make the right decisions, we do things wrong, we act wrong, we are not living our lives right, and we don’t understand what she understands about life.

She doesn’t understand why the girls on survivor have to wear such little clothes and she thinks that the young woman who calls in sick to work should suck it up like she does (and make everyone else sick at work like she does).

I could write a book about things my mother has said to me about other people and the judgments she makes on everyone’s life, but this is just supposed to be a story. A true story, but one that opened her eyes a bit.

She was waiting in line at a gadget store to get some answers about why her phone wasn’t working properly. She had stepped out of line for a moment to look at something on display and when she stepped back two ‘young kids’ had taken her place in line.

The young man was tattooed all over his body and had long hair tied back in a ponytail, and the girl he was with had way too skimpy shorts on and a halter top as well. They looked like they were ‘bad kids’ with no direction in life, and they were rude and ignorant as well. Hell, they probably did drugs!

To her surprise, while thinking this, the young man turned around and asked if she had been in line. My mother being the quiet hypocrite politely exclaimed that it was no problem and that she had stepped out of line anywase (while she swore in her head).

Once she got up to the teller she asked about her phone. The teller became busy on the phone and my mom had to wait for help. While she was waiting the young (tattooed) man turned around and said “I couldn’t help but overhear you. I think I may be able to help you with your problem.” He then proceeded to help her for the next half an hour figure out exactly what the problem was with her phone. He even got on the phone with his brother who had the exact same phone as my mom to hash out a solution.

Turns out he was a computer guy who worked in a really good job and knew what he was talking about. He was polite, helpful, and willing to lend a hand when he really didn’t have to. He wasn’t the rude, ignorant, bad boy (drug addict) she had judged him to be and she was shocked!

I was so happy to hear her tell me this story. I’m not surprised that she judged them but I was surprised that she said something nice about him. Sometimes she will hold her judgments in place, even if they prove her wrong. But this time she got a little wake up call to getting to know people before you judge them. And it actually sunk into her head! She has actually lessened her judgments!

What’s the Moral of the story? - If my mother – who judges on a daily basis no matter what I say to her can change her thoughts about someone and stop being so quick to judge – anyone can.

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