Does He Love Me? Does She Love Me? - How to Tell
Do You Love Me? Well, do you? We have heard this said before and it's strange sometimes that we even have to ask.
If you find yourself in a relationship that you are unsure of how your partner feels about you, you may find yourself asking this question more than you like to.
In this article we are going to discuss how to tell if he or she loves you by helping you understand the difference between love and lust.
Is It Love or Lust?
How do you know if he/she really loves you? Here are some things you need to know about love and lust to help you decide for yourself.
Love and lust are both strong feelings that people have for one another. They both feel the same. They are so close to feeling the same that they are often mistaken for one another. However, there are major differences between the two. The differences are often seen by ones actions and the things they say.
Lust is where every relationship starts. You see someone, you think their attractive, you like them a lot, you have an extreme emotional desire for them. You don't know them well enough to love them. Even though it may feel like love, its lust.
I know sometimes people say the word lust and it just sounds horrible. You think of a dog with their tongue hanging out drooling. Sometimes this is the case, but lust is just a strong yearning desire.. just like love. However, Lust is not committed to you. Lust in the beginning stages of a relationship seems to be great and at times a lot of fun. Lust just doesn't have all the bells and whistles that love has.
Lusts turns into Love. Love is bigger, it's stronger and it last a whole lot longer. As you get to know a person ,spend time with them, help them, and involve yourself in that persons life you begin to move from lust into a better situation called love. .
Let's Take a Look at a Relationship that is of Lust and One that is of Love
Lust will do all the things that love does. It will wine and dine you. It will tell you it loves you and they want to marry you. However, when comes time to proving what they are saying it's a totally different attitude that you get.
Lust will speak in terms of "me" and "mine". Lust will most of the time not inconvenience itself for you. Lust will use arguments between the 2 of you as a time to venture off into seeing other people. Lust is driven off sex not you. Lust will most of the time put your feelings 2nd.
Lust knows nothing about you. It doesn't know your favorite color, the kind of music you like, what size clothes you wear. It doesn't know what makes you laugh and what makes you cry. Lust usually has more than 1 relationship going at the same time. Lust does not last through the tough times. It probably has almost never met your family. And to top it off , lust will almost never concern itself with these things.
These lustful characteristics will play a significant role in how he/she treats you later in the relationship, more on this in a moment.
Love, on the other hand, is a strong desire just like lust. But it comes with a bigger and truly unbelievable better package. It too will wine and dine you, tell you it wants to marry you. When it comes time to proving what they are saying , it can prove it and so much more.
Love will speak in terms of "us" and "ours". Love will use an argument between the 2 of you as a time to get an understanding of whats going wrong and try to fix it. Love knows your favorite color, your clothing size ,what makes you laugh and what makes you cry. Love has no other relationships. Love is driven off you and not sex. Love will last through the tough times. Love will always concern itself with these things.
The problem often comes when a person never comes out of the lust stage. Lust that does not turn into love will begin to become problematic as the newness of the relationship dies down. All the things they were doing to try to get you to "go out with them" seems to go away. You'll find a person that only has lust for you, will make you feel since they "got what they want" they are satisfied and no longer need to put their best forward. A lustful person, because they are not committed to you becomes mean, disrespectful, and uncaring without caring if it hurts you or not.
When someone has began to love you, however, they go from being just someone you are dating to someone who genuinely cares for you and your feelings. You can feel that they want more and they want to be more to you. They make a conscious effort to show you they love you and want to be with you by continuing to give you their best even after the newness of the relationship has died down.
These are the things you need to think about when asking yourself "Does He/She Love Me?"
In the next section, we will discuss how you can spot someone who may only be looking for a lustful relationship and someone who is looking for love before you dive into a relationship with them.
Love or Lust Resources
- Follow Candace on Facebook for More Real Love Advice
Get more love advice and tips that can help you understand your relationship. Follow, Like and Share the Love!
- Does He Loves Me?
Find Out Exactly How You Can Tell if He Loves You. Get the Honest Truth About How He May Feel About You Now!
- Is It Love or Lust?
Take the Love or Lust Quiz and find out!
Nip It in the Bud
When you are dating someone. Be sure to listen to what's being said, asked and done. Are they asking any questions about you? What you like? What you dislike? Are they asking about your parents? Where you're from.. etc. A person that is trying to piece you apart is more than likely, genuinely, trying to get to know you for the purposes of one day loving you.
Also, take a close look at how that persons lives. Does this person appear sneaky, deceptive, or too good to be true? Does this persons actions match what they are saying?
If you're going on dates with someone and they are never asking any questions about you, you need to put up a red flag. If the conversations are about the latest ball game, news, hair style, great places to hang out and sex all the time. You should start to wonder.
If at times this person comes up "missing" and can only call you at certain times, I'd say there might be an issue. If they tell you, they love you... but you can't tell that they do, there might be a potential problem. If their temper gets hot when you try to explain yourself .....and this goes on and on for every date ... These are the clear signs of someone that may be problematic to you.
A lot of times relationships fail on the first dates because neither one or both involved took the time to find out about each other. To make matters worse, they end up sexually involved and BAM.... they're in a relationship and no one knows squat about the other.
People that have casually slipped into a relationship in this manner really don't know who they're dealing with. When all the excitement has died down, it's then they find out what kind of person the other is. Sometimes, it's not what they expected.
If you are trying to find love, pay close attention to whats going on during the dating stages. To help better your chances of getting into a loving relationship it's important you understand the difference between love and lust as covered in this article.
Off to a Good Start
To get off to a good start with finding true love, be mindful of what is going on during the first dates. On the first dates when a person is looking to have a loving relationship with you, they're asking all kinds of questions about you ,your family and anything they can think of to get a feel for you. If you are feeling the same you should be asking similar questions too. You're essentially looking to find out if this person is a good candidate for you.
Also, when a person is seriously considering getting to know you for the purpose of loving you, their actions will tell you just that. Their words matches their actions. There is no mystery to them, they are not trying to hurt you or deceive you in any way. You feel loved.
As you go about the relationship, the 2 of you will be excited to learn all you can about the other. You will see the two of you growing together and not apart. Your needs and feelings will be 1st in each other lives.
This is not to say it will always be easy. Problems will arise for sure. But the key will be how the two of you get through it. Love will always look to fix whats wrong and be sympathetic to your needs so it can get back to happiness. Love does not want to quickly end the relationship as a fix. It will do what ever it can to make things better first and foremost.
Use the tips found in this article to help you answer the question "Does He/She Love Me?"
There's so much more you can learn about love and lust by visiting How Do I Know If He Loves Me . You can also get all kinds of Relationship Advice on all kinds of love topics too.
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