ONLINE DATING RANT

Online Dating After 50

I've been back on the online dating screen for less than two months. Nothing has changed with the behaviors of the men on these sites. I recently spoke with several on the phone; and within less than 10 minutes, they began talking about needing their sexual desires satisfied.

***SIGH***

Over a month ago, I gave a 70-y.o. man a chance to meet me in person. During our telephone conversations, he spoke like a true gentleman, stating he was marriage minded. When we finally met in person, he changed the script. He stated that he was wealthy and only wanted to have sex with me; but would take care of all my material needs. I left him right there.

***SIGH***

I recently met another guy and was introduced to his family. They welcomed me and were very nice. Again, this guy talked as if he was marriage minded. However, within a few minutes of private conversation he began commenting on my luscious lips and how he loved my 'behind'. He even asked me what types of panties I liked.

***DEAD***

He realized I wasn't too happy with his questions. He went on to tell me that he would love to marry me; but he didn't know me well enough.

Okay.

What was my response? Here it is:

"So, you won't marry me because you don't know me well enough; but you will have sex with me even though you don't know me well enough. Ummm . . . okay."

>>>NEXT>>>

I have been giving this online dating scene too many chances to eke out a quality man. In its infancy, the online dating world was filled with genuine people seeking genuine relationships. Now, it’s chockfull of adulterers, philanderers (Those relationship statuses that state, “It’s complicated!”), scammers, and sexual deviants (Men who want to discuss BDSM or Bestiality. Yes, I’ve been contacted by those types, too!).

Only those who are afraid of human contact will rely solely on online dating to meet their mate. However, that AIN'T about to happen in MY world.

I'm aware of many who have met their spouses online and I know a few personally. That's beautiful and great, leaving with some hope that there are genuine men out there. I'm not a quitter. However, I am a realist. I will not spend another second of my valuable time communicating or conversing with grown-ass men who believe they are ENTITLED to my body. The saddest reality of my experiences is that ALL these men are over 50!

As I stated, I'm not a quitter. I'm out doing my thing. However, the digital age has RUINED it for those of us seeking genuine relationships! The SADDEST part of the online dating scene is the majority of the men who have contacted me are old enough to know better.

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2 comments

dashingscorpio profile image

dashingscorpio 15 months ago

Online dating did not create these types of men.

They've always been around. Personally speaking I've never understood how someone could be "marriage minded" without having someone they've fallen "in love" with. Hopefully these people aren't simply planning to marry "the next" person instead of "the right" person.

Every "serious relationship" I ever had began "casually" and (evolved) into something serious. These days people don't want to invest time getting to know anyone unless they're prepared to mail "save the date" notices!

Even if someone is "open to marriage" it doesn't necessarily mean they believe every woman or man they meet is "marriage material".

It also doesn't mean they have an (all or nothing) mentality when it comes to dating, fun, and romance. Some people believe in "living life" while they continue their search for "the one". Life is a personal journey.

Lastly it also takes time to get to know someone even if you're initially impressed with them to determine whether or not they are "the one".

My advice to people is first of all avoid the "free dating" sites. Secondly research various online dating sites including the niche sites that cater to particular demographics. (Age, race, religion, political affiliation, pet owners, or whatever is a "must have" for you.)

Thirdly: Stop being so serious! Dating is suppose to be a FUN sociable activity. The first date is primarily to see if there is any chemistry between you, have a similar sense of humor, hobbies/interests, what is your favorite this or that...etc Even when there is no connection learn to enjoy the movie, play, concert, dinner, or whatever the activity is.

Online dating is nothing more than a "tool" for meeting new people. Much like a fork is a tool for eating. However you will never hear of an obese person blaming their weight gain on their fork!

And yet many people who have bad online dating experiences will blame the online dating industry!

Each of us gets to (choose) our own friends, lovers, and spouse.

We (choose) who we go out with so therefore if someone is having one bad dating experience after another it may be time for (them) to re-examine their "mate selection" criteria! Learn to be a better shopper!

One other consideration is Meetup.com which is not an online dating site. It contains thousands of groups of people who have various hobbies and interest in common. The groups meet up once or twice a month. Groups range from dancing, yoga, meditation, hiking, theater goers, book clubs, writing, and even some single mixers. At worst you may end up making new friends with people who have similar interests. Should you meet someone who is eligible you can get to know them over time a the meetings.

Best wishes!


dashingscorpio profile image

dashingscorpio 15 months ago

You may want to go to datingadvice.com and read reviews of some of the online dating sites out there. eHarmony is known for attracting serious daters. However I'm told there is a 400 question survey required to be filled out. Nevertheless if someone is that serious they're likely to invest the time.

Quite awhile back I wrote a hub titled 6 Common Mistakes Women Make With Online Dating. It may be of some help to you as well. http://hubpages.com/relationships/6-Common-Mistake...

Best wishes!

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