What Does a Girl Mean When She . . .

Here are a few words of a complete fool: "Yeah, I been married to my 'old lady' for two years and I ain't bragging, but I know her better than she knows herself." Ladies, am I right about the man who had little enough sense to make such a statement being a fool?

This was the norm from as far back as the 1930's and on through the 1950's. But somewhere in the mid-1960's, some bold and daring woman started a movement entitled "Women's Lib," which at first was more like a roaring fire on the open range. Men were enraged, outraged and not quick to get engaged to their fiancee's due to them wanting equal rights with men.

Ignorance played a huge role in the rebellious men. Threatened is more accurate. And throw in a few pounds of misunderstanding and a smidgen of poor communication and presto! You have pure chaos in a marriage that had mostly been dominated by men.

God bless the men (in my following) and myself when it comes to communicating and understanding what women are saying and not saying. No, I am not talking about the old adage, "when a girl says yes, she really means no," and visa versa. I am under the impression that when a girl says "no," she means "no."

But what about body language? And no, again, I am not talking about how wonderful women look "dressed to the nines" and walking down the avenue. Honestly speaking, "this" body language is beyond (a) language. It is a Heavenly symphony all in perfect tune.

So with that being typed, what does a girl mean when . . .

She Has - - a puzzled look on her face? Good question. First make sure you are not the subject of her concern. Sometimes your wife or girlfriend will see you at lunch with a girl cousin whom you have never told her about and this can always cause a girlfriend or wife to look confused. So make sure that you tell her about every female in your life relatives, ex-lovers and all.

She Yells - - but not at you. A wise boyfriend or husband will, every time, check to make sure that he is not the reason she is yelling. Relax and listen to why your girlfriend or wife is yelling. If you are patient, she will tell you about it at a later time. Bank on it. I speak from personal experience. Note: many times a girlfriend or wife will wait for a few days and when you are exhausted from a tough day's work, start telling you what the problem was when you are at the point of dozing off to sleep. Just preparing you.

She Glares - - away from or at you. Any way it means problems. Sometimes trouble. A girlfriend might have hurt her feelings by not noticing her recent weight loss or some male bank employee mistakenly called her by another girl's name. Glaring is just her way of digesting how disgusting or senseless she thinks the person was who caused her to get angry

Puts Her Hands - - on her hips and looks into your eyes without batting one time. This communication avenue means "angry," and mostly at you for forgetting something you said that very morning you would do for her. So learn to keep a list, either written or mental, of what you promise your girlfriend or wife you will do on a certain day or night for her.

Takes a Deep - - breath when you share something with you that you swear is a great money-making idea. Guys, do not be extra-sensitive when your girlfriend or wife "tells" you something by taking a deep breath it just means that your idea is not feasible. And try not take this cute gesture so personal.

Becomes Distant - - and says few words. Oh, you do like all men do and ask over and over what is bothering your wife or girlfriend with no success. Girls are deeper in emotional situations and thinking than guys. Many times a girl is simply going over a painful memory of something that happened years ago that always causes her sadness. Please do not start saying, "Okay. It's my fault. Might as well go ahead and admit it. My fault." Statements like this will only make things more tense.

Speaks Short - - when you just say hello. She is aggravated, but not always with you. Give your girlfriend or wife some space. Believe me. If it is you who causes her to be short with you, she will tell you, so until she does, just "go with the flow."

Pats Her Foot - - at the bank or some institution where you and her are to wait to be seen by an investment banker, lawyer or realtor. This simply means that she is impatient and not angry at you.

Drums Her Fingers - - on the nearest table or arm of the loveseat she is sitting on at the time. (See above explanation and transpose "drums her fingers" over "pats her foot).

Silent Stare - - is tough to catch, but simply put, you and your sweet wife or girlfriend are watching a great film on television. But you are so into the film that you do not hear your wife or girlfriend talking away at you about someone from her college class calling that morning wanting to visit with her. This is tough to explain, but somehow you just sense you need to look in her direction. Then you see the silent stare mixed with a bit of anger. Politely ask her to repeat what she just said. And "this" time, LISTEN!

Mentions Another - - woman's name more than four times during an evening of watching television or going out to eat. Pay close attention on her tone of voice. If she sounds sharp and catty, it is because you have said something this "Cathy Sue" happen to cook better than her and you bragged on it or you gazed at this "Cathy Sue" as she walked gingerly down the produce aisle at the grocery store dressed in her short tennis skirt and white sneakers. Apologize as quickly as possible. The longer you wait will lead to more anger and it will be you who bears the brunt of your wife or girlfriend's anger.

Note: when I have sat up way too late when writing hubs, my wife has an easy signal for telling me it is bedtime. She simply stands over me pointing at her watch.
Either I have been correct in assuming it was bedtime or it was "time" for me to hit the road.