What Grandpa and Grandma Talked About During Their Courtship

We all at one time or the other, have dreams. These interesting "journey's" in our sleep can carry us to distant places, talk to an old flame we lost years ago, or enjoy a dream of serious and interesting information about people in our own families.

For instance. Consider our grandpa and grandma and how they lived, worked, and were an integral part of a social network in their day during the early 1800's. Personally, I find this era more than interesting. I find it highly-valuable in its supply of near-priceless information that might help me in the fast-paced year of 2016.

Before we begin, let me preface this topic with some preliminary facts:

• Boys and girls in this era when "courting," always "dressed to the nines," no flesh showing. At all. Remember, the moral conduct and standards were much higher in the 1800's.

• Conversations too, were carefully-monitored by the girl or boy's chaperon probably the family priest or minister, a trusted uncle or aunt. Anyone who had a sharp knowledge of right and wrong.

• Couples could not embrace for fear of sparking a lust for each other that was strictly-condemned by the church, so the couple had to sit with each other, but not too close. This was also governed by their chaperons.

• The fashions (see graphics in this hub) were more than respectful, but not stuffy. Now if the couples had been "courting," in the Victorian Era, I doubt if the couples could see each other for all of the layers of clothing used to cover their physical features. (I am talking to the girls).

• Talk about strict. In the latter days of the Victorian Era, the young man and girl would stand in a room with each surrounded by friends and messages were taken back and forth by a chosen, trusted person of perfect moral standards. I said it was strict.

• For girls, laughing or giggling, even in softest tones, were considered "secular flirting," and not supported by the church. Integrity and the saving of it, was the name of the game in this time.

What Grandpa and Grandma Talked About During Their Courtship

• "John, why the sad face?" "Oh, Mary Katherine, I had a traumatic episode today." "Oh,?" "Yeah, my father, a good man, grew angry and whipped my ass." "Oh, my! Are you hurt?" "Mary Katherine, my father whipped my donkey because I could not get it to moving faster while I was plowing."

• "Simp, may I ask you a Godly question?" "Sure, Anna Lee." "Do you like to collect rocks?" "Well, sure, but in our home, there isn't time for leisurely hobbies. My mother says leisure hobbies are from the devil."

• "Evelyn Joyce, did your family get your corn planted before the moon changed phases?" "Sure, Henry. My father and brothers did that in, and I am not boasting, record time."

• "May I pay you a compliment, Ella Carol?" "Sure, but I need to see what my chaperon says. We don't need to start talking sinful for fear of going to hell." "That would be okay, but keep your compliment decent." "Ella Carol, I think your parlor is decorated perfectly."

• "Jason, would you like a cup of tea?" "Oh, sure, Minnie June. I just love tea, but in a moderate amount."

• "Clark, I enjoy cross-stitching. What productive past-time to you have?" "Margaret Joan, I love to cut a large amount of timber and then split it up for us to use as firewood. Sorry that you cannot do this for cutting and splitting wood is a man's thing to do."

• "Flora Mae, I am very nervous about something I need to ask you." (Chaperon draws nearer upon hearing this remark). "Well, ask me, but please, no devilish jokes or wisecracks." "Flora Mae, I was pondering last week if I might have the wonderful privilege of walking you to church next Sunday morning--of course with a chaperon and us walking three feet apart.

(Then proving that life is not perfect), it happens . . .

• "Billy Durbin, who is finished with his saucer of home-made tea cakes and delicious tea, starts to hand the saucer and cup back to "Ophelia Streetman Backkerberry, accidentally drops the saucer and cup into the floor. A look of fear dominates "Ophelia's and Billy's face. Both their mouths are wide open and they are speechless.

• "Darn it," exclaims "Ophelia" before she can catch herself. "Whackkkk!" This is the sound of their chaperon striking her on the shoulders with a long, slick, slim, narrow Hickory bough. A punishment for young people for committing such a sinful error.

• "Ophelia drops her head in shame." "Well, Miss Ophelia, it is getting late. Almost 6:30 p.m., and my bedtime. I do not see me calling upon you again for my parents strictly forbid me from courting such a fowl-mouthed worldly girl as yourself."

One out of ten courtships that failed is not a bad record.

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