What is Moving On?

Ok….so what is healing???? I or some person is doomed to the state of depression after a series of bad relations, and is broken to the hilt. But he/she moves on; is able to love some other person. But that other person breaks his/her heart. Maybe it was his/her own fault; or maybe it was only his fault. I don’t know. But a heart is broken one more time. NO big deal, some would say, after all, there are so many people in this world who go through this, and still live, or are okay with it. But not this one person, the skies have fallen for him/her. No meaning of this life too. So, he/she goes on to struggle to find at least happiness in continue living, and bravo, he/she manages it!! Well done guy/gal. He/she is proud of himself/herself. He/she goes on, modifying or more appropriately creating a mutated version of himself/herself! He/she succeeds in doing so, or so I think, before the emotions strike again, twice. Making that person realize that he/she had never really changed. So, will some one please tell me, what is moving on??? Is it managing to move on and love some other person? Or is it protecting oneself from more heart breaks, more futile relations or emotions, and not running after some mirage like dreams, just wait for the right person, or maybe right moment; and till then erase all desires of love, companionship, etc. Till then, just focus on what is equally if not more important, my parents, career, hobbies?? Is it really possible to not think and manage both emotions and other goals, relations together? Maybe he/she is afraid now to take those chances; what if you get hurt again, and that pain interferes in their other pursuits? After all, after sometime one does realize what one can afford to lose, and what can’t.

Is it so wrong to give yourself chance after chance in love? Is it so wrong to try and find your true companion? What if none of the persons you loved, and those who supposedly loved you back, do not reciprocate your feelings the way you do. What if this cycle goes on, and despite your best efforts, and all the love, you realize none of them really wanted to be your companion for life. Either because they were happy being just acquaintances, or best friends, or their love was not for a lifetime. It was plain time pass for them, so the same company which was interesting initially, became boring in later days. First he/she had no dearth of time for you, then gradually either they were busy; or maybe other friends took over. In nutshell, you were no longer that important in their life.

So, the most important decision or question of that person: “should I forget all about my dreams/desires for love, companionship, cherished moments, romance? Or should I go ahead and take the risk of getting hurt again, still, after four-five heartbreaks? Which of the latter means moving on/healing, or becoming strong in true sense? The other important question, Is loving some one again after all this, my strength or my weakness?”

Lots of questions and answers I guess! I’ll choose my own answers, what about you?

-Charu Bhatnagar

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