Stressed? How to have PEACE

Are you stressed out? ANGRY? Want to have a calm spirit?

In my last blog, I talked about "how to stay happy with your spouse". I'm going to continue on those lines in this blog. I plan to take a Proverb for each blog and share my experience and outlooks on them.

Anger, it's an emotion that left unchecked can cause us much heartache and pain. I used to have a anger problem. I grew up in a home that was filled with anger. I don't remember a day at home (unless we had company), that my mom and dad didn't fight.

They never physically hit each other, but the verbal abuse was just as painful, if not worse.

Looking back, I have empathy for my parents. I know they didn't know how to handle the pressures of life, nor did they have any education on relationships.

In the 60's, you just didn't search out help. And, they didn't go to church, so they had no social or church network to help them. It wasn't until I got married, that my mom and dad received Jesus into their hearts and started attending church. Hallelujah! That was a miracle!

We tend to carry what we learned as a child into our lives and relationships when we get married. That is, until we get revelation of what is the healthier and happier way of living.

That's exactly what I did. I was SOOO ANGRY! I was mad at my husband everyday. Why? Well, he wasn't doing what I thought he should be doing! I thought he was my problem. I was unhappy for so many years until I found out that God didn't want me to "Let the sun go down on my wrath." To me that meant, don't go to bed Linda, until you get the problem worked out.

That wasn't easy for me to do. I didn't know what to say to him. I would stay awake trying to not go to sleep angry and he would be next to me fast asleep. It made me even madder! I thought, "How can he sleep when I'm so upset!" He had already forgotten about it and was sleeping soundly.

What happened to cause my breakthrough? It was a process of inner reflection on my needs and lack of self-esteem. I was really miserable with myself and looking to my husband to meet those needs. When I found out that he couldn't make me feel better, that it had to come from within, it was a part of a healing process.

One day, I remember he had made me so upset that I couldn't hardly see straight. I had decided that when I got mad, I would pray and ask the Lord to help me. Well, this day I was so mad, I said to the Lord, "Lord, you've got to help me RIGHT NOW! Because if you don't I may do something that I will regret.". The Lord heard me and helped me. Thinking back, I believe that was a turning point in my deliverance from anger.

The Proverbs I read this week reminded me of that victory over anger. It says in Proverbs 17: (two different translations)

• Verse 27 in the Message Bible says, "The one who knows much says little; an understanding person remains calm."
• Another translations says, "Anyone who has knowledge controls his words. A man who has understanding is not easily upset."

I graduated this past year from an Advanced Leadership training course, which was very life-changing. One of the things they taught us was to be "grounded and centered". This taught me to focus on the inside and not on the events that are happening on the outside.

The Bible teaches that we are a 3-part being: 1) We are a SPIRIT, 2) We live in a BODY, 3) We have a SOUL, which is our mind, will and emotions.

• 1 Thessalonians 5:23 (Taken from www.bible.com) May God himself, the God of peace, sanctify you through and through. May your whole spirit, soul and body be kept blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ.

Learning to focus inside to my spirit and not on the situation, has really helped me not to be stressed out. I love to be able be calm in the midst of stressful situations. That doesn't mean I don't ever get upset, it just means I'm not stressed out all day, everyday like I use to be. I enjoy life now, instead of being stressed out. I enjoy my husband now, instead of getting stressed out by what I think he should or shouldn't be doing.

Something to ponder...

There's a lot more I could share, but I'll save that for the next blog.

Until next time...

Linda Cross

Email me, I'd love to hear from you!

lindasblogs@gmail.com