How to Let Things Go?

“Letting go” becomes very difficult for all of us because of our attachment to things and people. I thought over and over about this topic, “How to let go”. That led to another question, “What to let go of”?

All of us want to lead a happy, contended and peaceful life. What are the hindering factors for achieving happiness and peace? The burdens we carry on our shoulders are the hindrances to a happy and peaceful life. By burdens I mean the mental burdens we accumulate over long periods of time. These burdens are jealousy, hatred, revenge and other negative emotions.

All of us have experienced this feeling some time or the other. Basically if you dig deep down into the depths of this feeling, we can see that jealousy originates from the fear of self-inadequacies. We feel that someone else is better than us or somebody else has better accomplishments than us. But, is it true? We are not inferior to anybody. On such occasions we have to pamper our mind and tell it that we are good at many things and we need not feel jealous or inferior to others.

Hatred actually starts from small differences of opinion. When there are two individuals it is natural to have differences of opinion and conflicts. But if we don’t take conscious effort to pacify, reunite and strengthen the relationships, these negative emotions follow. Knowingly or unknowingly we tend to brood over those little differences of opinion and try to emphasise and prove that the other party is on the wrong side. Arguments and resentment starts and it reaches a stage where the individuals no more feel the warmth of the relationship.

Hatred means that we are not ready to accept the presence of others or that we look at the other person as a competitor or someone who stands in our way. This shows that we don’t believe in ourselves. We need not feel threatened by others. We should be able to love ourselves to the fullest so that the love spills over and spreads to our fellow beings and they will no longer be a threat. Rather we will develop the capacity to accept the person as he or she is and get along with them irrespective of our differences of opinion.

It is developed when anger is not handled properly. It is not wrong to feel angry. All of us feel angry on several occasions. But we should be careful that it is not taking a destructive turn. When we feel anger towards someone, over some issues, it is best to have dialogues and resolve the issue. If we can take things lightly in life and if we are able to laugh at ourselves for the silly mistakes we make, life becomes easier and the number of anger outbursts comes down.

We should learn to forgive others by sending positive thoughts towards the people who hurt us. Trying to stop the negative thoughts consciously also will help in letting go and forgive others.

Having self-awareness is the most important key to get over these negative emotions. All of us are filled with inner qualities of love, care, concern and peace. If you have ever spent time in solitude, listening only to the sound of your breath, you might have realised these inner qualities in you. The more we become aware of these inner qualities, for most part of the day, we will be able to maintain a pleasant mood. If you carefully observe, you can see that gradually your interactions with others become fruitful and positive. Your mind is not filled with hatred, anger, jealousy or revenge. With this exercise of seeking solitude and reinforcing the good inner qualities we start to feel very light inside, our problems and worries will become negligible and we start feeling oneness with others which is the end of all worldly problems.

Dear Friends, please leave your thoughts and opinions as comments.