Painting Over Yellow - How Fear Affects Our Life
A few years ago I made a very poor paint choice. I painted the walls of our rec room an angry yellow. It was supposed to be gold, but it looked exactly like mustard. I had vague plans to paint over it, but then I found out it is difficult to paint over yellow and I was stopped dead in my tracks. Choosing to paint is always difficult for me and knowing it will be hard makes it even more difficult to begin.
I was in a paint store the day I found out my yellow wall was more than just a decorating mistake, that it was in fact, an ordeal to overcome.
I was at the paint store getting advice for my upstairs rooms because clearly I cannot be trusted with paint choices.
As my friend and I gathered supplies we were chatting and I said, "I really need to paint over that yellow wall downstairs." The reaction to this comment was eerie. The whole store stopped. I had been speaking to my friend, but a saleslady responded with what sounded like panic in her voice, "Yellow?" She proceeded to inform me that yellow has a stubborn way of shining through. It will affect other colours and change their appearance. The yellow might be hidden beneath a new colour but it is still influencing and changing the colour on top.
Yellow.
Yellow bellied.
Are you yellow?
Taunts of cowardice. Fearfulness.
My yellow wall became a giant object lesson with a spiritual application. I struggle with fear. I am a follower of Christ. I read the Bible and I know the promises He gives and still my life, my words, my actions are tinted by the underlying yellow in my heart. There is fear tainting my life as a follower of Christ.
So how do I get rid of this yellow?
The lady at the paint store said I will need a very good primer. What primer can rid me of my fear?
I know the answer.
For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline. 2 Timothy 1:7
God Himself gives me the power to overcome fear. It is a change that comes as I continually turn to Him in my fear and He Himself changes the fear to love.
The primer I need is the power of the Holy Spirit and a continual steady love. When my stomach knots in fear because I think I cannot be the parent, the wife, the friend, the daughter or the sister I ought to be, I ought not to be paralyzed by fear. It does not need to tint my actions and my thoughts yellow. When fear wants to shine through, I need to do battle by turning to the One who loves me. The Lord Jesus died and rose to save me. He offers me life "to the full" (John 10: 10), not a fear-full life. He has demonstrated His love for me in countless ways, I cannot help but love Him. When I rest in the knowledge of His love and total provision the fear cannot exist, it cannot taint my thoughts, my words or my actions. All that is left is a child loving and trusting her Father and her Father loving and providing her with a 'Spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline.'
"There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears in not made perfect in love." I John 4:18