CMLL Super Viernes Preview: Tournaments! (Tournaments Everywhere)

RIP Chyna and Prince

And just like that he’s back already. Hey, when you take a week off from writing to beat all three Uncharted games and watch season two of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt, you’re going to return with a huge burst of energy that not even Bill Walton can match. That’s what you’re seeing from me here with my second column in…several hours. This time we’re breaking down tomorrow’s CMLL Super Viernes show, which features Block B of a tournament, a cool main event and three other matches that I can assure you will most definitely occur. What occurs in them is the mystery. But enough wasting time; I’ve got Ten Commandments memes, lunch and a replay of Uncharted 2 to get to (gotta get all that treasure peeps!). Moses, take it away.

Angelito and Stukita vs. Pequeño Nitro and Pequeño Olímpico

What to Expect: An opening CMLL match that happens to feature a really, REALLY good wrestler in Stukita. He’ll do cool stuff and the other guys may do so too (I’ll be honest; I haven’t seen any of these other dudes as far as I know of). I’m frankly just hoping that Pequeno Olimpico is better than actual Olimpico. Not a huge challenge, but you just never know.

Winners: Angelito and Stukita. And the beat goes on.

Esfinge, Pegasso and Tritón vs. El Cuatrero, Skándalo and Virus

What to Expect: GOOD GAWD, THAT’S VIRUS’ MUSIC! The king has returned and really, that’s all that matters here. Two other things to look out for; El Cuatrero wrestling without his usual partner Sanson and how Esfinge responds to what was a…well it wasn’t pretty this past Tuesday, let’s just say that. Remember when CMLL decided to give him the Gran Alternative push over a bunch of other young guys a few months ago? Pepperidge Farm remembers.

Winners: The rudos will take it two to one, with Virus and Cuatrero getting the pins/submissions in the final fall. Once more, the beat goes on.

Ángel de Oro, Rey Cometa and Stuka Jr. vs. Euforia, Olímpico and Ripper

What to Expect: Finally some potential excitement besides Virus and Stukita, even if it’s mostly on the technico side. Seriously; this is a bout of two very different teams. The technicos are armed with three high flyers capable of great feats, and one of them (Cometa) has the potential to be utterly electrifying at any given moment in time. For the rudos, we’ve basically got Psicosis “The Snake” Ripper, Euforia (a good but not great member of the UG’s group) and Olimpico, who strikes fear into the hearts of lucha fans everywhere with just the mere mention of his name. I foresee this coming down to two simple factors; can the rudos keep up with the technicos and keep this from dragging and perhaps most importantly will they be able to catch these three when they launch their all out assault through the air? Both need to hit for this match to be more than a forgettable Friday Night six man with a few cool dives.

Winners: If there’s a God (or Cthulhu) in the sky, the technicos should win this. Thankfully we all know Cthulhu exists, so the technicos will take this two falls to one. And with that, the good stuff is now upon us!

Torneo Nacional de Parejas Increibles (Block B)

Caristico and Cibernetico vs. Atlantis and Gran Guerrero vs. Máximo Sexy and Terrible vs. Rey Escorpión and Último Guerrero vs. Kráneo and Súper Porky vs. Dragón Lee and La Máscara vs. Titán and Vangellys vs. The Panther & Tiger

What to Expect: Some history first for the first time reader/CMLL viewer; the Torneo Nacional de Parejas Increibles (the National Incredible Pairs Tournament) is an annual CMLL tourney that features two blocks of eight teams; the twist is each team features a technico and rudo teaming up and often times the partners are enemies. Yes, this is totally Dario Cueto’s favorite non Trios Tournament…tournament in the history of the western hemisphere. Seeding for the blocks is decided by a battle royal (with the last two men winning), after which the teams throw down like Godzilla and Mothra. Last week saw Block A commenced with Mistico and Mephisto claiming a spot in the finals. And thus here we are with Block B. And it’s a loaded block; like Scrooge McDuck loaded.

Seriously, aside from the Kraneo-Super Porky union that no one asked for this is a pretty bad ass block. We’ve got Caristico and Cibernetico in a weird/wacky union, Atlantis and Gran Guerrero in a continuance of the never ending Atlantis-Guerrero issues, Maximo and Terrible (two men who feuded over the CMLL Heavyweight Title last year), Escorpion and the UG (veteran badass’s baby!), the feuding Dragon Lee and La Mascara, a bizarre but welcome Titan/Vangellys partnership and a really, REALLY intriguing pair in The Panther and Tiger. That’s seven really good teams here and it should lead to six really good to great matches (provided Kraneo and Porky are bounced in the first around, as they should be). Look for this to come down to the two teams you’d expect in Caristico/Cibernetico and Atlantis/Guerrero, though I wouldn’t be surprised to see Escorpion and UG enter the conversation. And damn, I really want to see this Panther/Tiger team. Keep an eye on these guys people; both are really good and could be the show stealing team of this block.

Winners: You can pretty much flip a coin between the Caristico/Cibernetico team and the Atlantis/Guerrero one. My head says it’ll be Atlantis/Guerrero because Atlantis wins this tournament almost every year (seriously, the only thing Atlantis dominates more is great mask vs. mask matches). My heart however says Caristico/Cibernetico, mainly because that means Caristico and Mistico would have to square off next week and my goodness I really want to see those two wrestle. In the end I’m going with my heart and say Caristico and Cibernetico take this by defeating Atlantis and Guerrero in the finals, leading to a big time Caristico/Cibernetico vs. Mistico/Mephisto final next week. Now all I need is for that final to lead to Caristico/Mistico at the Anniversary Show (either for the Mistico name or mask vs. mask) and I’ll be happier than a drunken Chuck Bartowski when Sarah finally admitted she was into him. Good times man, good times.

Máscara Dorada, Mistico and Volador Jr. vs. Cavernario, Felino and Mr. Niebla

What to Expect: If the tournament wasn’t enough fun for you, well then there’s the main event that features three of the best high flyers in lucha libre today, CMLL’s most underrated wrestler in Cavernario, the always welcome Felino and Mr. Niebla, who strangely seems to be entertaining me more and more with each passing week. I wouldn’t expect this match to be long enough for it to rise to extraordinary heights, but even if it only gets 5-10 minutes these are two teams that will give you something entertaining. The most interesting aspect will be whether or not this match sets up something going forward; Volador did beat the sadly missing Negro Casas last month, perhaps it’s time for him and Casas’ bro Felino to square off.

Winners: This is either going to be a technicos win 2-0 via DQ in the second fall or the rudos winning 2-1 after one of the rudos gets an unseen foul on one of the technicos to set up a big match next week to go along with the Torneo Nacional de Parejas Increibles final. If I had to pick…let’s go with the latter. A complete and utter guess I know.

And that children is how a preview column becomes…a preview column. I didn’t think that one far enough ahead. I’ll be back later with a conspiracy theory about Octagon and his outrageous quest to keep himself relevant. Till then, here’s a picture of Blue Demon being…I’ll just let the images tell the story actually.

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