Fun Tips on Boosting Home Energy Efficiency


Bad Bubble Bath

It might make you happy, but it’s banned, banned, banned.
It might make you happy, but it’s banned, banned, banned. | Source

Tip One:

You know that bubble bath you used to luxuriate in? It wastes energy, wastes bubbles and makes your skin wrinkled if you linger too long. So no more of those for you.

Instead, get yourself a bucket, stand it outside and collect rainwater. Then after the rain has stopped, take the bucket inside, stand over it with a flannel and give yourself a wash-down. Not only will you save your money and the planet, but you’ll feel very virtuous.

Better yet, next time it rains, just strip off, and run outside to the back garden or yard for a shower.

(For alternate tips for wusses see opposite the blue box towards the end of the article.)

Tip Two:

Get rid of your washing machine. That will save the environment loads of energy and you loads of money. You can give up that expensive gym membership with all the extra exercise you will be getting.

And there’s no cheating allowed, so don’t think you can head off to the launderette and feel virtuous. (We British couldn’t even if we wanted to since launderettes are a thing of the past, with about one per 1000 square miles.)

So dig out that old washing board and start scrubbing.
What do you mean, you haven’t got one, and you don’t even know what one looks like? Here’s a picture, and if you can’t find one to buy, go make one.

Just for you, not one, but two washing boards

Source

Besides boosting your home’s energy efficiency and getting yourself a work-out at the same time, another advantage of washing by hand is that your clothes will last longer, so saving you even more money, and saving even more of the world’s resources. This is because you’ll wash your clothes less often. Okay, you might smell a bit, but who cares?

You do? Well then, get creative with your clothes-wearing and pop a tee-shirt on under your sweater. Tee-shirts take less time and effort to wash than sweaters and you’ll need the sweater to keep warm in winter, since you will also be turning down the heating. (But that’s another tip and I haven’t finished this one yet!!)

Did I hear you whining, but how do I wash the bedding? I can’t do the sheets by hand!

That’s what you use the bath for, now that you are no longer destroying our environment, and your skin, by steeping in it. Plus, think how strong you’ll be after wringing all those sheets out. Then you take your (dripping) sheets outside and hang them over your washing line to dry.

What are you whining about now? It’s raining? Well then, get an inside clothes drying rack or one of those pull-out lines to hang over the bath.

(Serious aside: electric tumbler dryers are the biggest users of energy in the home; see alternate tips for wusses for more info.)

A Poll

Should there be a photo for Tip Three?

  • Yes, that would be very funny.
  • No, I don’t want the writer to be banned from Hubpages.
  • Hmm, let me think about it…
See results without voting

Tip Three:

Cut your home off from the grid and use your poo to create fuel to power your central heating boiler. Truly, it’s possible, and happening, if not quite on a domestic level yet. Here’s just one of many articles I found. Human waste used to create green fuel

(Does it smell? I’ve no idea, but my guess is probably.)

Source

Tip Four:

Since you’re now off-grid and using you-know-what to heat your home, you’ll want to insulate it thoroughly to keep fuel usage to a minimum. After burning your you-know-what, you might be left with some ash. A builder once told us that ash is a very good insulator and it poses no fire-risk, since it’s the residue left after the fire. Victorians scattered it between floors, so I suggest you do the same. (Does it smell? I’ve no idea, but my guess is no, since it’s been burned.)

Ninja Monkey Polar Fleece Drop Seat Footed Pajamas, Size 4
Ninja Monkey Polar Fleece Drop Seat Footed Pajamas, Size 4

If you are going to keep yourself warm by looking like a big baby, you might as well go all the way and get a onesie with a monkey print.

 

Tip Five:

Copy the teenagers and get a onesie. You thought these were for babies? Think again. Adult (or almost adult) versions of the baby all-in-one pajamas are all the rage with teenagers to wear while slobbing about at home. They keep you warm, so you can turn down the heating. So what are you waiting for? I’ve even included an Amazon capsule for you, so order one now.

And that ladies and gentlemen, are my tips for now. I hope you enjoy wearing your baby-outfit, while living in your poo-fuelled house, while bathing in the rain, while – actually I’ve just had a brilliant idea – you could go into the rain, while wearing your onesie and get both you and it washed at the same time. Onesies are made of polyester fleece so will dry in no time.

Products to boost your home’s energy efficiency.

Energy Film Glare Control Window Film 48-by-84-Inch
Energy Film Glare Control Window Film 48-by-84-Inch

This film is easily added to your window and could save you energy all year round. In winter it provides insulation and keeps your home warmer, and in summer it and reduces glare from the sun in, so keeping you cool.

 
Niagara Earth Massage 1.25GPM Low flow showerhead
Niagara Earth Massage 1.25GPM Low flow showerhead

This shower head gives you plenty of force, but with less pressure, and saves 40% energy and water over a standard shower head.

 
Honey-Can-Do DRY-01610 Heavy Duty Gullwing Drying Rack, White
Honey-Can-Do DRY-01610 Heavy Duty Gullwing Drying Rack, White

With this drying rack you can dry your clothes inside without using an energy draining tumbler drier.

 
Crawford-Lehigh LA84P-1 Large Capacity Deluxe Parallel Clothes Dryer
Crawford-Lehigh LA84P-1 Large Capacity Deluxe Parallel Clothes Dryer

This outdoor washing line takes up little room in your garden and your clothes will smell gloriously fresh if dried outside. (Known in the UK as a ‘whirly.)

 

And if, by any chance, you don’t like the suggestions above, please read my:

Alternate Tips For Wusses.

Tip One:

Take Showers instead of Baths.

Save bubble baths for when you feel especially low or stressed, and have a shower instead. Fit a low flow showerhead or shower restrictor to give you a clean while still staying green.

Tip Two:

Experiment to find the minimum wash cycle and temperature that gets your clothes clean. However, don’t overdo this. If anyone in your household has asthma or other respiratory problems, wash bedding at 60°c. This temperature kills 100% of house dust mites, a main cause of allergy. Likewise, if someone is ill, wash at a temperature high enough to kill off any infection. (If you end up washing clothes twice because the temperature was too low, you aren’t saving energy or money, so be discerning.)

Whenever possible hang washing outside to dry. Tumbler dryers are the biggest user of energy in any household. Either use a washing line or what we in the UK colloquially call a “Whirly”. (Technically known as a rotary dryer, see the Amazon capsule for an illustration.) If it’s impossible for you to dry outside, then use a clothes-drying rack to dry inside. As this produces condensation, be sure to open a window. However if it’s too cold to open a window, the condensation produced will require more heat to evaporate, and, according to green thing Wiki, then it’s time to use your tumbler dryer, as it becomes as energy efficient as drying on the rack.

Tip Three:

Compost your kitchen waste to use in your garden. (Just to be totally clear: kitchen waste means your vegetable and fruit peelings.)

Tip Four:

Insulate your home. Wool is a natural insulator that is now widely used instead of the hazardous fiberglass previously used. A well-insulated house means you can turn the thermostat down in winter and yet it stays cool in the summer without the need for air conditioning. You can further, and very cheaply, insulate by adding a tinted film to your window. These help keep warmth in during winter and reduce glare from the summer sun, so boosting your home’s efficiency all year round.

Tip Five:

Wear appropriate clothing for the weather. This might mean turning the heating down in winter and wearing extra clothing. Natural fibers such as wool, cashmere or silk are breathable and keep you warm. So pop on a cardigan or sweater. In summer take your work suit off when you get home so you don’t need the air-conditioning so low.

Now, that was all easy wasn’t it?

More by this Author


28 comments

Sunshine625 profile image

Sunshine625 4 years ago from Orlando, FL

I truly appreciate British humor!!! I like the way you think Yvonne and I'm glad we're hubbing buddies!! I'm off to purchase a washboard or two. Not! Voted UP and Funny!!


jesimpki profile image

jesimpki 4 years ago from Radford, VA

Love it! Very funny way to catch people's attention and great tips (the wussy ones)!


Just Ask Susan profile image

Just Ask Susan 4 years ago from Ontario, Canada

LOL Loved all your ways to boost home energy tips and found this hub really funny. Sorry but I am a Wuss what can say, I'll have to take the alternatives.


Melovy profile image

Melovy 4 years ago from UK Author

HI Sunshine625,

Yay, you got here first! I so glad this hub was useful to you and that you are off to buy some washboards. Oh, but what’s that I see, a Not! What a wuss.

Thanks for you comment, and I’m glad we’re hubbing buddies too.


VeronicaFarkas profile image

VeronicaFarkas 4 years ago from Ohio, USA

I, too, am a bit of a wuss. "You-know-what" will never be used to heat my home! LOL

Great ideas. Seriously. I enjoyed the humor, too!


Melovy profile image

Melovy 4 years ago from UK Author

Hi jesimpki,

Glad you like the hub. I saw your comment on the WTI forum, and will be reading your hub soon. Thanks for reading and commenting.


Melovy profile image

Melovy 4 years ago from UK Author

Hi Susan

Another wuss - what is Hubpages coming to?

Thanks for stopping by, and glad it gave you a laugh.


Simone Smith profile image

Simone Smith 4 years ago from San Francisco

Hahaa, this is fabulous! And I, for one, LOVE my onesie.


Melovy profile image

Melovy 4 years ago from UK Author

Hi Veronica,

And yet another wuss, I see. Not willing to try out ‘you know what’? What can I say?

Thanks for your comment and glad you enjoyed it.


Melovy profile image

Melovy 4 years ago from UK Author

Hi Simone,

You are about the right age for a onesie, so I’ll let you off! Thanks for your comment, and glad you enjoyed the hub.


tillsontitan profile image

tillsontitan 4 years ago from New York

You certainly catch attention with this one! Loved it and laughed through the first half. Job well done Melovy! I'll have to try to find my mother's washboard.


Melovy profile image

Melovy 4 years ago from UK Author

Hi tillsontitan,

Ah, I’m so glad to see your off to get your mother’s washboard. What a relief that the message is getting through to someone. Finally someone with some stamina after all these wusses!

Thanks for your comment and glad it gave you a laugh.


cherylone profile image

cherylone 4 years ago from Connecticut

Melovy, I laughed all through the first part of this hub and thought it was great, then I read the second half and thought it was great too, what a great way to catch a persons attention! :)


YasmeenAli profile image

YasmeenAli 4 years ago from Atlanta, GA

I love this! Although, I have heard that baths actually conserve more water than showers. But either way, this was an enjoyable and somewhat useful hub.


Melovy profile image

Melovy 4 years ago from UK Author

Hi Cherylone,

I’m so pleased to see the hub made you laugh, and that you enjoyed the second half too. Thanks for your kind comment.


Melovy profile image

Melovy 4 years ago from UK Author

Hi YasmeenAli,

I think it’s power showers that use as much water as baths, and it probably depends how long you spend in the shower and how much water you have in your bath! I remember reading a few years ago that in parts of Australia people were asked to spend no more than 5 minutes in the shower because of a drought at the time. (Not sure how they enforced it, perhaps the shower police came along and told people they’d had enough and to get out now!) Still, the low flow shower heads should make showers more efficient.

Thanks for your comment. It got me thinking, as you can see!


YasmeenAli profile image

YasmeenAli 4 years ago from Atlanta, GA

Melovy,

HAHA! shower police...I love that! I remember hearing something about the drought in Australia. I think just for me personally I don't use as much water in the bath...or maybe that's just what I'll tell myself because I enjoy them so much. Thanks for your reponse!


TKs view profile image

TKs view 4 years ago from The Middle Path

Great job, Melovey. Perfect set-up to get people thinking your "wussie" tips are a doable option in comparison.

As a side note, if not enough people do their part to conserve, your first collection of tips, may be our only option left.


Melovy profile image

Melovy 4 years ago from UK Author

Hi again Yasmeen,

When I was young (many years ago) there was a bumper sticker which read: ‘Save water, bath with a friend.” So you could always try that!

Seriously, it’s all about balance, meeting our needs and the environment’s needs, and taking conscious action is the way to go. It’s quite likely you are using less water since you are considering what you do. Thanks for popping back.


Melovy profile image

Melovy 4 years ago from UK Author

Hi TKs view,

Glad you liked it. I was actually surprised how much action has already been taken towards number 3 of the non-wussie tips - though as I said, not on a domestic level. However far-out some of the ideas seem, I do admire these pioneers of conservation. I’m very optimistic about the state of things; I recently heard a radio program about amazing changes that have happened in Brazil to protect the rainforest, and there’s lost of action taking place in the UK. New build houses have to be carbon neutral from 2016.

Thanks for your comment.


Sharyn's Slant profile image

Sharyn's Slant 4 years ago from Northeast Ohio USA

OMG, I am not all that familiar yet with your humor but wow, I got a huge glimpse of it here! Love this, the serious tips and the funny ones too! Great job.


Melovy profile image

Melovy 4 years ago from UK Author

Ah, Sharon, I’d like to think my humour is witty, but it is probably more accurately described as very silly! Glad to read you enjoyed it and the serious tips too. Thanks for your comment.


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO

Melovy - you make me proud!! LOL

I absolutely LOVED this hub - it's so hilarious and man so many things ring true...you are so virtuous!

I have a washboard - but it's just for decoration! lol


Melovy profile image

Melovy 4 years ago from UK Author

RHW, so glad you enjoyed this. I had fun writing it.

Cool that you own a washboard so when we've run out of oil etc you'll still be able to get your clothes clean!


Cogerson profile image

Cogerson 4 years ago from Virginia

Awesome humor within some very interesting tips to make your home more energy efficient. Thankfully where I live....the summer heat is about to be over...so we will have a break before the cold weather gets here.

I wonder if we had the washboard in the photo, if we could get the teenagers to ever wash their clothes again. Voted up and funny and very useful.


Melovy profile image

Melovy 4 years ago from UK Author

Hi Cogerson,

I had fun writing this - does that show? Funny that you are cooling down, here in Scotland we are at long last getting sunshine and warm weather - and the kids go back to school tomorrow!

Thanks for your comment and the votes.


jenbeach21 profile image

jenbeach21 4 years ago from Orlando, FL

Thanks for the tips. They are too funny. I wish adult onsies were more socially acceptable. They certainly look comfortable!


Melovy profile image

Melovy 4 years ago from UK Author

Jenbeach21, glad you enjoyed the tips! Adult onsies do look comfy don't they? Thanks for your comment.

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