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How to Go Directly to Jail
It’s funny that it began with a refrigerator. By funny, I mean, I recently spent five days in the county jail. After the initial anger over the injustice of my arrest, and the interrupted sleep of sobering up, I always find...
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I Am Sex
Can I have the floor for a second? I would like to speak honestly and from a place that has seen less light than Helen Keller. My Heart. I am not sex. I reach out for my phone to prove this statements validity. I will reinforce it by calling...
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Dating Tips
1. Become bi-sexual. - I realize that some of you have just thrown up a little bit in your mouth, but hear me out. It is far easier to keep things in perspective and maintain a reasonable amount of tolerance when you imagine these two...
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Breaking the Silence.
Listen. That’s the sound of the crickets chirping. All these years of silence and when I finally vomit up my vigilance, nada. Not that I have a “reading audience”, but I’m almost certain I have a family around here somewhere… now...