Margo Arrowsmith received the "Lens of the Day" Twice
Arrowsmith Printing 9/22/08
Macular Degeneration: the Blindness You Can Prevent 4/5/11
"Knowledge is knowing that tomatoes are fruits. Wisdom is not putting them in a fruit salad" Unknown
Margo Arrowsmith is fiercely committed to enabling those who take care of their elderly parents do a great job, have a life of their own, save money and have more joy.
If you are looking for a proven professional who can guide you to address the medical, social and financial issues that prevent the best care for your parents, hinder your own professional and personal life and make you feel constantly stressed, guilty and inadequate for the job you've come to the right place.
With more than 30 years of professional experience and 10 years of personal experience caring for her own parents Margo Arrowsmith is uniquely qualified to understand your parent care problems from all angles.
Her mission is to enable more people to be able to stay at home in their declining years, with the best care that will make them happier while saving money and bringing more joy to all.
From an early age Margo has shown a penchant for helping people solve problems combined with an amazing insight. She learned more about doing this through earning a masters, years of post graduate training and years of hands on practice with a variety of families and individuals.
Her biggest challenge came when she spent five years helping her father take care of her mother and then took on the responsibility for helping her father during his final years.
"My father did most of the care for my mom for five years. She was a little difficult to handle, but he did the work and was devoted to her. They lived in a cottage in my back yard and the set up was ideal.
Then one day Dad came down with aspiration pneumonia. He was initially hallucinating but remained disoriented for several weeks. When he left rehab he still wasn't back to his old self and it was unclear that he ever would be.
I was working full time and had a mortgage to pay. There was no way I could take this by myself. I panicked and started looking for assisted living homes. There were some lovely homes, with small rooms and huge price tags. Unfortunately, but ultimately fortunately my parents really couldn't afford it. Had they moved into one of these homes their money would have been gone in a year and the home would have discharged them back to me. They would have been broke and there would have been no money to hire any help at home.
Thank God, Dad recovered fully and pretty quickly. The night before he died, in my home, at nearly 93 he was sharp as a tack. He was able to continue the care for mother until just before she died. We were able to get help from Hospice in the last days, but if I had it to do over again, I would insist that he build a team earlier.
Dad was devastated when his bride of 69 years left him early. But he had a positive attitude and a will to go on. Knowing him as I did, I know that he would have been depressed and broken after living in even the nicest of elder homes.
Other than a quintuple bi pass surgery at age 85 my dad had always been strong and healthy, but years of eating fried food and working hard with no real exercise had taken their toll and he was in fact 88. I had five wonderful years with him, but I also had to watch him become more and more fragile.
We eventually had to hire some help for him to bath and other things. I learned a lot about resources and how to manage a team. If I had it to do over again I would have insisted that we work on getting a team earlier.
The benefits? 10 years with my parents where they were happier and not broke. When they absolutely had to have team, the money was there to hire people and as Dad always insisted, there was a little left over after he died.
But the ultimate payoff was the night of November 20, 2009. Dad was going to sleep in his lift chair as he often did. But then he called me down stairs, he had decided to get into his bed. He asked me to help him unbutton his shirt cuffs. I helped him into bed as he was having trouble lifting his legs. I hugged him and told him how much I loved him and he told me the same. We said good night. That was the last contact we had as the next morning I found that he had passed in his sleep.
If he had been in a home, no matter how nice, we would never have had that."
What excites me about doing this work with others who are dedicated to caring for their parents at home, but still want to have a life, is that I know how daunting it can seem, but how possible it is, with the right plan.
What I have to offer is decades of professional experience and the invaluable hands on, 'been there with you' insights. I will guide you to the right solution for you and your parents. You will see your parents having the best care while having time for a personal and professional life of your own. You will have more joy with your parents and in your own life. You will even ultimately save money.
You will have the knowledge about what to do and what is available and have the wisdom to know how to use those things with your own personal, family situation.
Whether you are right in the middle of an out of control situation with your elderly parent care or just contemplating a future that will necessitate care for your parents, Margo Arrowsmith can help you.
Call her at 919 844 7904 or email at Margo.Arrowsmith@gmail.com
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