10 Common Things You Must Never Do To An Elephant
How about them elephants?
Did you ever dream of owning an elephant as a pet?
Did you ever in your most-psychedelic dreams want to be a elephant?
These are not silly things to consider, but two serious questions with answers that dictate how you really feel about elephants. From Disney's Dumbo to warrior general, Hannibal Barca's trekking over the Alps with the much-needed aid of his elephant caravan, elephants have always played an important role in our lives. But these humble creatures have never stood up for themselves and demanded a fair amount of respect.
- Hannibal is best remembered for leading the Carthaginian army and a team of elephants across southern Europe and the Alps Mountains against Rome in the Second Punic War.
- Hannibal, the warrior general of the Carthaginian army, lived in the second and 3rd century B.C. He was born into a Carthaginian military family and made to swear hostility toward Rome. During the Second Punic War, Hannibal swept across southern Europe and through the Alps, consistently defeating the Roman army, but never taking the city itself. Rome counterattacked and he was forced to return to Carthage where he was defeated. To avoid capture by the Romans, he eventually took his own life by taking a form of fast-acting poison.
- At 26, Hannibal was given command of an army and immediately set out to consolidate Carthaginian control of Iberia. He married Imilce, an Iberian princess, and conquered or allied with numerous Iberian tribes. He made the seaport of Qart Hadasht ("New City," now Cartagena) his home base. In 219 B.C., Hannibal attacked the town of Saguntum (Sagunto, Spain), raising the ire of Rome and starting the Second Punic War.
A few elephant facts:
Just what do you know about elephants besides watching them parade tail-to-nose-to-tail in those monotonous circus parades that used to come through "Small Town, U.S.A." to announce their shows on the outskirts of town for a few days. The poor elephant. Used for almost everything, and seldom given the homage it well-deserves.
It was once estimated that there were once more than 350 species of elephants in the world. Today we only have two of them left: the Asian and the Africa species.
The African elephant is the largest of the two species left in the world. They have extremely large ears and both the males and the females grow tusks.
Asian elephants have been domesticated for thousands of years. The powerful beasts have been employed to move heavy objects, such as felled trees, carrying humans on their backs, and even to wage war.
In my fascinating research about elephants, I found out some very astonishing facts. So astonishing that I had to condense my information down to . . .
10 Common Things You Must Never Do to an Elephant
10.) Dress-up like Batman and try to get the elephant to hoist you up on its back by yelling at him or her.
9.) Jabbing this magnificent creature in the side with a sharp stick to get it to obey you.
8.) Throwing scalding water in its face to show it who's boss.
7.) When riding the elephant, never let your foolish nature lead you to kick it in the sides. Always remember. This is an elephant. Not a horse.
6.) When you feed apples or peanuts to this humble beast, never try and trick the beast by applying Snap-E-Tom hot sauce to its food.
5.) Charging toward the elephant waving your arms and screaming thinking that this will scare the elephant into pulling your cousin "Roy," who loves to abuse alcohol and weighs over 302 pounds, out of a nasty drainage ditch where he passed out last night from trying to find his way home.
4.) Telling your little nieces to use the elephant's truck to play jump rope.
3.) Running the elephant through an automatic car wash.
2.) Making the elephant wear a derby hat and RayBan's to look like Tom Cruise.
1.) Forcing the elephant to drink gallons of beer and watch it stumble (like you do) when you are intoxicated.
And elephants do have phenomenal memories, so if you do any of these things to an elephant, I would say that you get what you deserve.